Читать книгу Bound By His Vow - Мишель Смарт, Maya Blake - Страница 12

LEO UNMOORED HIS motor launch and motored out to a favourite spot where he could look back at the twinkling lights fringing the Amalfi coast. He dropped anchor and sat on the deck, listening to the gentle slap of the water against the hull and the musical clanging of the rigging against the mast of a distant yacht as the onshore breeze passed through. A gibbous moon cast a silver glow across the crinkled surface of the ocean. It was the closest he got to peace these days, out here on the water.

It was laughably ironic that Eliza thought he was off bedding a mistress. He hadn’t been with anyone since Giulia had died ten months ago. Not that his relationship with her had been fulfilling in that department. He had tried to make it work a couple of times in the early days, but he had always known she was lying there wishing he were someone else.

Hadn’t he done the same?

He hadn’t wanted to hurt her by treating her as a substitute, so in the end they had agreed on a sexless arrangement. He could have had affairs; Giulia had told him to do whatever he had to do and she would turn a blind eye, but he hadn’t pursued it. He had the normal urges of any other man his age, but he had ignored them to focus on his responsibilities as a parent and his ever-demanding career.

But his physical reaction to Eliza was a pretty potent reminder that he couldn’t go on ignoring the needs of his body. He had wanted her so badly it had taken every ounce of self-control not to back her up against the nearest wall and do what they both did so well together. His groin was still tingling with the sensation of her body jammed tightly against his. He had felt the soft press of her beautiful breasts against his chest. He had desperately wanted to cover her mouth with his, to rediscover those sensual contours, to taste the hot sweetness of her.

He had intended to keep his distance during her short stay. He had been so confident he would be able to keep things on a business level between them. But, reflecting on it now, he could see how that call from Kathleen when he was in London for his meeting had completely thrown him. He was used to having his life carefully controlled. His domestic arrangements ran like clockwork. He had come to rely heavily on his staff, almost forgetting they had lives and families and issues of their own. When Kathleen had begged him for some time off he’d had to think on his feet and the first person he had thought of was Eliza. He’d told himself it was because she was a talented teacher and used to handling difficult and needy children. But what if the subconscious part of him had made the decision for a completely different reason?

He still wanted her.

Who was he kidding? Of course he still wanted her. But would a month be enough to end this torment that plagued him? Those three weeks he’d had with her had never left his memory. He could recall almost every passionate moment they had spent together. The memory of her body lived in his flesh. When he looked at her he felt his blood stir. He felt his heart rate rise. He felt his skin tingle in anticipation of her silky touch. The need to possess her was a persistent ache. Seeing her again had brought it all back. The blistering passion she evoked in him. The heat and fire of her response that made him feel as if she was his perfect mate—that there was no one else out there who could make him feel the way she did. It was going to be impossible to ignore the desire he had for her when every time he came within touching distance of her his body reacted so powerfully.

But wouldn’t an affair with her create more problems, which he could do without right now?

On the other hand, he was used to compartmentalising his life. He could file his relationship with her into the temporary basket. Wasn’t that what she would want? It wasn’t as if she was going to end her engagement for him. She’d had four years to do so and yet she hadn’t.

He didn’t understand how she could sell herself so short. What was she getting out of her relationship with her fiancé that she couldn’t get with him? He had offered her riches beyond measure, a lifetime of love and commitment, and yet she had thrown it back in his face. Why? What tied her to a man who still hadn’t married her? He didn’t even live with her. What hold did he have over her? Or was Eliza keeping a ‘fiancé’ up her sleeve so she could flit in and out of any shallow little hook-up that took her fancy? The ring she wore didn’t look like a modern design. What if she just wore it for show? What if it was her get-out prop? ‘Sorry, but I’m already taken’ was a very good way of getting out of a relationship that had run its course. She might have picked the ring up at a pawn shop for all he knew. If there was an actual fiancé Leo was almost certain she wasn’t in love with him. How could she be when she looked at him with such raw longing? He was sure he wasn’t imagining it. From the first moment he had laid eyes on her he had felt an electric connection that was beyond anything he had felt before or since.

But this time he wouldn’t be offering her anything but an affair. He gave a twisted smile. A shallow hook-up was what he would offer. He would set the rules. He would set the boundaries and he would enforce them if he had to. He would not think about the morality of it. If she was willing to betray her fiancé—if there was one—then it was nothing to do with him.

She could always say no.

By two a.m. Eliza had given up on the notion of sleeping. It wasn’t the jetlag or the strange bed. It was the restlessness of her body that was keeping her from slumber. A milky drink usually did the trick but could she risk running into Leo by going downstairs to get one? She hadn’t heard him return, but then, why would he need to? He had plenty of staff to keep his household running while he indulged in an off-site affair with his latest mistress.

Eliza slipped on a wrap and went downstairs. There was enough moonlight coming in through the windows to light her way. Just as she was taking the last step down, the front door opened. She gave a little startled gasp and put her hand up to the throat where her heart seemed to have jumped. ‘Leo?’

He gave her a wry look. ‘Who else were you expecting?’

Eliza pursed her lips. ‘I wasn’t expecting anyone. And I wasn’t waiting up for you, either.’

A mocking glint shone in his dark eyes. ‘Of course not.’

She jutted her chin at him. ‘I was on my way to the kitchen to get a hot drink.’

‘Don’t let me stop you.’

Eliza looked at his tousled hair. Bed hair. Just had wild sex hair. It maddened her to think he could just waltz in and parade his sexual conquests like a badge of honour. ‘How was your evening? Did it live up to your expectations?’

Even in the muted light she could see the way his mouth was slanted with a cat-that-got-the-canary smile. ‘It was very pleasurable.’

Jealousy was like an arrow to her belly. How could he stand there and be so…so blatant about it?

‘I just bet it was.’

‘You would know.’

Her brows shot together. ‘What’s that supposed to mean?’

His smile had tilted even further to give him a devilish look. ‘You’ve had first-hand experience at spending many a pleasurable evening with me, have you not?’

Eliza tightened her mouth. She didn’t want to be reminded of the nights she had spent rolling and screaming with pleasure in his bed. She had spent the last four years trying to forget. She threw him a dismissive look. ‘Sorry to burst the bubble on your ego, but you haven’t left that much of an impression on me. I can barely recall anything about our affair other than I was relieved when it was over.’

‘You’re lying.’

Eliza gave him a flinty glare. ‘That’s what really irks you, isn’t it, Leo? It still rankles even after all this time. I was the first woman to ever say no to you. You could have anyone you wanted but you couldn’t have me.’

‘I could have you.’ His eyes burned with primal intent. ‘I could have you right now and we both know it.’

She gave a scornful laugh that belied the shockingly shaky ground she was desperately trying to stand on. ‘I’d like to see you try.’

His eyes scorched hers as he closed the distance between them in a lazy stroll that sent an anticipatory shiver dancing down the length of her spine. She knew that look. It made her blood race through the circuitry of her veins like high-octane fuel. It made her heart thud with excitement and her legs tremble like a tripod on an uneven floor. It made her core clench with an ache that had no cure other than the driving force of his body.

He took her by the upper arms, his fingers digging into her flesh with almost brutal strength. ‘You should know me well enough by now to know how foolish it is to throw a gauntlet down like that before me.’

Eliza suppressed another little shiver as she flashed him a defiant look. ‘I’m not scared of you.’

His fingers tightened even further as he jerked her hard against him. ‘Then perhaps you should be.’ And then his mouth swooped down and slammed against hers.

It was a bruising kiss but Eliza was beyond caring. The crush of his mouth on hers brought all of her suppressed longings to the surface of her body like lava out of a volcano. She felt the raw need on her lips where his were pressed so forcefully. She felt it in her breasts as they were pushed up against his chest. She felt it unfurling deep in her core, that twisting, twirling, torturous ache that was moving throughout her body at breakneck speed.

How had she gone for so long without feeling this feverish rush of passion? It was like waking up after a decade of sleep. Every pore of her skin was alive and sensitised. Every muscle and sinew was crying out for the stroke and glide of his touch.

His tongue stroked hers until she was whimpering at the back of her throat. His hands were still hard on her upper arms, his fingertips gripping her with bruising force, but she relished in the feel of his commanding hold. His proudly aroused body was pressed intimately against her. She felt the hard ridge of him against the femininity of her body. The barrier of their clothes was torture. She wanted him naked and inside her, filling her, stretching her—making her feel alive in a way no one else could. She moved against him, speaking in a silent and primal feminine language that was universal.

But, instead of answering the call to mate, he dropped his hold and pulled back from her. He wiped the back of his hand across his mouth as if to remove the taste of her. It was a deliberately insulting gesture and she wanted to slap him for it. But she would rather die than show him how much he had hurt her.

‘You’ve certainly got the Neanderthal routine down pat,’ she said, pushing back her hair with a flick of her hand. ‘I’m surprised you didn’t haul me upstairs by the hair to your lair.’

His dark eyes mocked her. ‘Surprised or disappointed?’

She held his look with a sassy one of her own. ‘I wouldn’t have done it, you know. I wouldn’t have slept with you.’

The corner of his mouth kicked up cynically. ‘No?’

‘I was playing with you.’ She straightened her wrap over her shoulders with fastidious attention to detail. ‘Seeing how far you’d go.’

When she finally brought her gaze back to his another involuntary shiver trickled down her spine at the sexy, knowing glint shining there.

‘You know where to find me if you feel like playing some more. My room is three doors down from yours. You don’t have to knock. Just come right in. I’ll be waiting for you.’

Eliza gave him a crushing look. ‘Your confidence is seriously misplaced.’

His mouth tilted sardonically as he turned to make his way up the stairs. ‘So is yours.’

Eliza was up early the following morning. Not that she had slept much during the night. The needs Leo had awakened made her feel restless and twitchy. All night long her mind had raced with a flood of memories of their past affair—racy little scenes where she had pleasured him or he had pleasured her. Erotic little flashbacks of her lying pinned beneath his rocking body, or her riding him on top until she gasped out loud. They all came back to haunt her—to torture her with the gnawing ache of want that refused to be suppressed. Was that why he had stepped back when he did? He wanted to make her own her need of him. He was playing with her like a cat did with a hapless mouse.

She wasn’t going to let him break her. She knew he wanted her pride as a trophy. He wanted to have all the power, to be able to control what happened between them this time around. She understood his motivations. She had hurt him. She regretted that.

But on the battleground between them was a small defenceless child.

It wasn’t fair to let Alessandra get hurt by the crossfire. Any arguments they had would have to be conducted in private. Any resentment would have to be shelved until they were alone.

As she was dressing after her shower Eliza noticed her upper arms bore the faint but unmistakable imprint of his fingers where he had gripped her the night before. It made her belly quiver to think he had branded her with his touch. She slipped on a three quarter length cardigan to cover the marks. She didn’t want to have to explain to Marella or to Laura, the agency girl, how they had got there.

Laura was all packed up ready to leave when Eliza went to the nursery suite. ‘Alessandra’s still asleep,’ she said, nodding towards the little girl’s room. ‘That’s the best she’s slept since I’ve been here. She’s been a little terror the whole time. I don’t think she’s slept two hours straight before. You must have a magic touch.’

‘I don’t know about that,’ Eliza said with a self-deprecating smile.

Laura lugged her backpack over one shoulder. ‘I’d better get going. I have a ride waiting for me downstairs.’ She offered her hand. ‘Good luck with it all. I don’t envy you having to answer to Leo Valente. He’s quite intimidating, isn’t he?’

‘He’s just being a protective father.’

Laura grunted. ‘Yeah, well, I wouldn’t want to get on the wrong side of him. Did you know him before or something? I don’t mean to pry, it’s just that last night I kind of got the impression you two knew each other.’

‘I met him briefly a few years ago.’ Eliza knew she had to be careful what she said. The confidentiality agreement Leo had made her sign made her think twice before she revealed anything about her previous connection with him. She couldn’t risk being quoted out of context. She had no reason to believe he wouldn’t be true to his word over the consequences of speaking out of turn. There was a streak of ruthlessness in him now that hadn’t been there before. Didn’t last night prove it?

‘You dated him?’ Laura probed.

‘Not for long. It wasn’t serious.’

Laura gave her a streetwise smile. ‘Maybe you could have another crack at it. He’s got loads and loads of money. He’d be quite a catch if you could put up with the foul temper.’

‘I’m already engaged.’

Laura glanced at her left hand. ‘Oh, I didn’t realise. Sorry. When’s the big day?’

‘Yes, when is the big day?’ Leo’s deep voice spoke from behind them.

Eliza felt her face flood with colour as his gaze hit hers. She wondered how long he had been there. Long enough if that brooding look was anything to go by. ‘Laura is just leaving, aren’t you, Laura?’

‘Yes,’ Laura said and made a move for the door. ‘I’ll see myself out. Bye.’

A prickly silence filled the room once the young woman had left.

‘I’d prefer you to refrain from gossiping with the hired help,’ Leo said in a clipped tone. ‘It’s in your contract.’

‘I wasn’t gossiping. I was simply answering her questions. It would’ve been rude not to.’

‘You’re not here to answer questions. You’re here to look after my daughter.’

Eliza returned his hardened glare. ‘Is that really why I’m here? Or it is because you have an axe to grind? Revenge is a dirty word, Leo. It’s a dirty deed that could turn out hurting you much more than it hurts me.’

His cleanly shaven jaw locked with tension. ‘I’d have to care about you for you to be able to hurt me. I care nothing for you. I only want your body and you want mine. Last night proved it.’

Anger pulsed in her veins at his arrogant dismissal of her as a person. ‘Do you really think I would allow myself to be used like that? To be pawed over like some cheap two-bit hooker you hired off a dark alley?’

There was a condescending glitter in his eyes as they warred with hers. ‘I’d hardly call a million pounds cheap. But you can forget about bargaining for more. I’m not paying it. You’re not worth it.’

‘Oh, I’m worth it, all right.’ She put on her best sultry come-to-bed-with-me look. ‘I’m worth every penny and more.’

He grasped her so suddenly the breath was knocked right out of her lungs. She felt the imprint of his fingers on the bruises he had left the day before but her pride would not allow her to wince or flinch. ‘You want me just as much as I want you. I know the game you’re playing. You want to drive up the price. I’ve sorted out your school, but it’s your bank account you want sorted out now, isn’t it?’

Eliza couldn’t stop herself from looking at his mouth. It was flat-lined and bitter now, but she remembered all too well how soft and sensual it could be when it came into contact with hers. Desire flooded her being. She felt the on-off contraction of it deep in her core. He was the only man who could reduce her to this—to this primal need that would settle for nothing less than the explosive possession of his body. Could she withstand this temptation? Could she work for him without giving in to this desperate longing?

‘I don’t need your money.’

He gave one of his harsh laughs. ‘But you’d like it all the same. You’re starting to realise what you’ve thrown away, aren’t you?’

‘I always knew what I was throwing away.’

His top lip curled. ‘Are you saying you have regrets?’

She arched her brow pointedly. ‘Don’t we all?’

He held her gaze in a stare-down that made the base of her spine fizz like sherbet. ‘My only regret is I didn’t see you for what you were at the outset. You’re a classic chameleon. You can change in the blink of an eye. I had you pegged as an old-fashioned girl who wanted the same things I wanted. But you were not that girl, were you? You were never that girl. You were a harlot on the hunt for sensory adventure and you didn’t care where you got it.’

‘Why is it such a crime for a woman to want sensory satisfaction?’ Eliza asked. ‘Why does that make me a harlot? What does that make you? Why are there no equally derogatory names for men who want to be satisfied physically? Why do women have to feel so bad about their own perfectly natural needs that you men seem to take for granted?’

‘What’s wrong with your fiancé that he can’t give you the satisfaction you want or need?’

The question was like a punch to her chest. ‘I’m not prepared to answer that.’

‘Does he even exist?’

Eliza looked at him numbly. ‘What?’

‘Is he a real person or just someone you made up to use as a get-out-of-jail-free card?’ His eyes were hard as they drilled into hers. ‘It’s a handy device to have a fiancé in the background when you want to get out of an affair that’s not going according to plan.’

She swallowed against the lump in her throat. Ewan did exist, but not as he used to be. And it was her fault. His life was as good as over. He would never feel the things he used to feel. He could never say the words he used to say. He couldn’t even think the thoughts he used to think. He existed…but he didn’t. He was caught between the conscious world and the unconscious.

‘You’re so fiercely loyal to him. But is he as loyal to you?’

Eliza lowered her gaze as she fought her emotions back down. ‘He’s very loyal. He’s a good person. He’s always been a good person.’

‘You love him.’

She didn’t need more than a second to think about it. ‘Yes…’

The silence hummed with his bitterness.

How was she going to survive a month of this? What good was going to come out of his attempt to right the wrongs of the past? Nothing could be gained from this encounter. He was intent on revenge but they would both end up even more damaged than they already were. She couldn’t fix Ewan and she couldn’t fix Leo. She had ruined two lives, three if she counted Samantha.

And what about her life—the plans she had made were nothing but pipe dreams now. She wouldn’t be able to have the family she wanted. She wouldn’t be able to have the love she craved.

She was trapped, just like Ewan was trapped.

Eliza turned to the nursery, desperate to get away from the hatred she could feel pouring out of Leo towards her. ‘I’m going to check on Alessandra. She should be awake by now.’

‘My daughter’s orientation and mobility teacher will be here at ten,’ he said. ‘Tatiana works with her until lunchtime twice a week. You can either have that time to yourself or observe some of the things she is helping Alessandra with. I don’t expect you to be on duty twenty-four hours a day.’

Eliza looked at him again. ‘Aren’t you worried that she’s going to be upset by my being here for such a short time? It sounds like a lot of people are coming and going in her life. It’s no wonder she gets upset and agitated. She doesn’t know who is going to walk in the door next.’

‘My daughter is used to being managed by carers,’ he said. ‘It’s a fact of life that she will always need to have support around her.’

She held his gaze for a beat that drummed with tension. ‘I meant what I said last night. I think you should get Kathleen to call her each day. It will give her something to look forward to and it might make the time go a little quicker for her.’

His jaw seemed to lock for a moment but then he released a harsh-sounding breath. ‘I’m not sure if Kathleen will be back. I got an email from her this morning. Her family want her to move back to Ireland. She’s still thinking about it. She’s going to tell me what she’s decided in a couple of weeks’ time.’

Eliza swallowed. ‘Does that mean you’ll want me to stay longer?’

His gaze became steely as it nailed hers. ‘Your contract is for one month and one month only. It’s not up for negotiation.’

‘But what if your daughter wants me to stay?’

‘One month.’ The words came out clipped through lips pulled tight with tension, those bitter eyes hardening even further. ‘That’s all I’m prepared to give you.’

‘Would you really put your plans for revenge before the interests of your daughter?’

‘This is not about revenge.’

She made a sceptical sound in her throat. ‘Then what is it about?’

His eyes roved her body in a searing sweep that made her skin prickle with heat and longing. The memory of his bruising kiss was still beating beneath the surface of her lips. The need he had awakened was secretly pulsing in the depths of her body—an intense ache that refused to go away. She felt it travel from her core to her breasts as his gaze travelled the length and breadth of her body. ‘I think you know what this is about.’

Lust.

It wasn’t a word Eliza particularly liked, but how else could she describe how he made her feel? From the very first moment she had met him he had triggered this earthy response in her. She knew he was experienced—very experienced. She had come to the relationship with much less experience, but what she had lacked in that department she had more than made up for in passion. Her response to him had shocked her then and it still shocked her now. Didn’t that kiss last night prove how dangerous it was to get too close to him? He would dismantle her emotional armour within a heartbeat. Making love with him would unpick every stitch of her carefully constructed resolve. She could not afford to let that happen. Going back to her bleak and lonely life in England would be so much harder to bear if she experienced the mind-blowing pleasure Leo offered. How would she settle for the bitter plate of what fate had dished up to her if she got a taste of such sweet paradise again?

Eliza threw him a contemptuous look born out of the fear that he would somehow see how terrifyingly vulnerable she was to him. ‘And just because you want something, you just go out and get it, do you? Well, I’ve got news for you. I’m not on the market.’

He came up close with that slow, leisurely stroll he had perfected. She refused to back away but instead gave him the full wattage of her heated glare as she steeled herself for the firm grasp of his hands on her arms.

But he didn’t.

Instead he gently brushed the back of his bent knuckles down the curve of her cheek in a barely touching caress that totally ambushed her defences. She felt her composure crack as her throat closed over. Tears formed and stung at the back of her eyes. Her chest felt like an oversized balloon was inflating inside it, taking up all the space so her lungs could no longer expand enough to breathe.

‘Why are you doing this?’ Her voice was not much more than a thread of sound. ‘Why now? Why couldn’t you have let things be?’

His expression had lost its steely edge and was now almost wistful. ‘I wanted to make sure.’

‘Sure of…of what?’

‘That I didn’t make the worst mistake of my life the night you told me you were engaged.’

Eliza swallowed a walnut-sized knot of emotion. ‘You…you had a right to be upset…’ She couldn’t look at him. She lowered her gaze again and stared at her engagement ring instead.

There was the sound of Alessandra waking in the nursery—the rustle of bedclothes and a plaintive wail.

‘I’ll go to her.’ Leo moved past and Eliza listened as he greeted his little daughter. He spoke in Italian but she could hear the love in his voice that was as clear as any translation. ‘Buongiorno, tesorina, come ti senti?’

Was it wrong to wish he could look upon her as his treasure too?