Читать книгу Extra Time - Michelle Betham - Страница 7

Ryan walked into the small, almost secluded tapas bar which was tucked away up a narrow side street in the small fishing village of Poris de Abona, about twenty miles or so from the main Tenerife tourist resorts of Los Cristianos and Playa de las Americas. He’d driven there after managing to escape any major interrogation from his teammates as to where he was sneaking off to during their morning off from training. He wanted to explore, that had been his excuse. And although a few of the lads had looked at him as though he was mad – surely any free time they had should be spent by the pool or playing golf? – after what Ryan had been through, nobody questioned him. Not even Jim. But then, he had other distractions, didn’t he?

Looking around the dimly lit bar, Ryan saw her sitting in the corner, her blonde hair piled up on top of her head, her eyes down, concentrating on her mobile phone. He walked over to the small, square wooden table, pulling out the chair opposite her and throwing himself down onto it, switching on the Ryan Fisher charm in an instant. Now he’d seen her, seen how hot she looked in that pale pink dress, her skin already lightly tanned, he was glad she’d turned up here, unannounced. He quite liked surprises, and surprises that would guarantee him a shedload of sex were the best ones of all.

‘Hey, babe.’

She looked up from her phone, placing it down on the table as she smiled the biggest smile. ‘Hey, back.’

‘So, you thought you’d surprise me, huh?’

‘I needed a break, and this is the last chance I’ve got to take one before the new season starts. It’s already getting busy back at work.’ She looked right into his eyes. ‘And I missed you. I didn’t realise how much I was going to until you’d gone.’

He felt a small twinge of guilt as he realised he hadn’t really missed her at all since he’d been here. He’d been way too busy to even think about her. Busy doing stuff she didn’t really need to know about. ‘I missed you, too.’ Jesus! The lies still came so easily to him. But at least he felt guilty about reeling them off these days, unlike before, when his lies had driven away the woman he should have been married to by now. But instead she was married to his boss. How frigging wrong was that?

‘Really?’ Ellen gasped, her voice shaking him out of his thoughts of Amber. He had to learn to stop doing that, drifting back to memories of someone he was never going to have. No matter how much he still thought he wanted her. ‘Oh, Ryan… I was so worried about telling you I was here, because I know partners aren’t allowed on this trip, and what with me working for the club and everything… That’s why I chose this place to meet, it’s out of the way…’

He shut her up by leaning over the table and planting a kiss on her unsuspecting mouth. She tasted good – a mixture of coconut lip balm and sun cream.

‘Was I going on a bit too much?’ she asked, her voice quiet, her eyes carrying an almost worried expression. ‘I know I can talk for England once I get started but…’

‘Ellen, it’s okay. Really. I’m happy you’re here, and hey, I like a woman who’s willing to break the rules now and again.’ He grinned, turning the Ryan Fisher charm up a notch, and he could see her relax instantly. Her pretty shoulders sagged, and her face almost lit up as she looked at him. But somewhere inside, a very small, very quiet alarm bell started ringing in Ryan’s head – he liked being with her, but was she starting to become just a little too attached to him? They’d spent a lot of time together over the summer break, and he’d tried really hard not to give her any mixed signals, because the last thing he wanted to do was mislead her. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt her.

‘Ryan… you and Amber…’

This was a conversation he really didn’t want to get into, not with her, so he was happy when a striking-looking dark-haired woman materialised at their table with two more bottles of beer, smiling at them both before retreating back to her post behind the bar. She provided a short but welcome distraction, and Ryan couldn’t help but watch her as she began serving another customer, smiling and laughing with a group of people at the bar whom Ryan guessed were regulars. It was that kind of place.

‘Ryan?’

He waited a second before turning to look at Ellen, that famous Fisher smile now firmly back in place. ‘Let’s finish these beers and go back to your hotel. Then you can show me just how much you’ve missed me. Okay?’

She smiled back, relief once more quite evident on her face. ‘Yeah. Okay.’

There was nothing like sex for taking Ryan’s mind off things. Nothing like it at all.

Amber closed her eyes and let the burning sun wash over her skin. Sighing contentedly, she settled back on her sun lounger by the huge circular pool at the team’s hotel. It was the day of Newcastle Red Star’s final match in their pre-season tour of Spain and the Canary Islands but, thankfully, Amber didn’t have to start work until later, when she and Ronnie would be at the match, talking to some of the players and interacting with the guys back in the studio, live from the game itself, a game which was being televised in the U.K. that evening on one of the Cloud Sports channels.

So, for now, all she had to do was relax. She couldn’t deny the nerves weren’t still there, though. This was a huge deal for her. She was the new face of football on a major satellite TV channel – for Amber it didn’t get much bigger than that. Cloud Sports had put a lot of faith in her, and she didn’t want to let anyone down, that was all. So far she’d been getting some great feedback, but those nerves were still going to take a while to settle down.

‘You look a bit apprehensive,’ Ronnie said, sitting himself down on the edge of the lounger next to her.

She opened her eyes, pushing her sunglasses up onto her head. ‘Yeah. Thanks for that, Ronnie.’

He smiled at her. Amber pushed her sunglasses down over her eyes and lay back again.

‘You’re doing great, Amber. Everyone back home is loving you, believe me.’

‘You’re not just saying that, are you? To placate me. I know what you’re like.’

‘As if. Anyway, you’ve done live TV before, haven’t you? Loads of times. Why should this be any different?’

‘I used to be on local TV, Ronnie. This is a whole different ball game.’

‘No it’s not. Where’s Jim?’

‘Team talk. They’re off to the ground for a training session in a little while.’ She sat up again, propping herself up on her elbows. ‘Why didn’t you bring Karen with you?’

Ronnie looked away for a second, staring out at the sea view in front of him. ‘I’m working, Amber.’

‘Yeah, and so am I. But I’m here with my husband.’

Ronnie looked at her. ‘Your husband is the manager of the team we’re following.’

‘So?’

He laughed slightly. ‘Come on, kiddo. Karen doesn’t want to hang around while I’m working. She’d only get bored.’

Amber sat up properly, pulling her knees up to her chest and hugging them to her. ‘She’d get bored? Here? Look at it, Ronnie. It’s beautiful! She could have…’

‘Leave it, Amber, okay? Just – just leave it.’

She widened her eyes as she looked at him, slightly taken aback by his tone. ‘All right. I’m sorry. Look, is everything okay?’

He sighed, pushing a hand through his hair. ‘No, and it’s me who should be sorry. Things are just a bit… a bit weird at the minute, that’s all.’

Amber cocked her head, desperate to know what he meant by that but getting the feeling that, whatever it was, he wasn’t in the mood to talk about it. But she couldn’t leave the subject alone altogether. ‘All the more reason to bring her with you, then, surely?’

‘No, Amber. Don’t you see? If I’d brought her with me, if I’d insisted she come here, wouldn’t that just have looked as though I wanted to keep an eye on her? Keep tabs on her? Make sure she wasn’t…’ He stopped talking, looking out at the sea view again.

‘If it was me, I wouldn’t have seen it that way.’

‘Well, Karen’s not you, all right?’

Amber frowned. ‘You’re happy though, aren’t you? I mean, you don’t regret marrying her again, do you?’

Ronnie continued to look out over the stunning clear-blue sea that was dotted with the odd jet ski and a catamaran way off in the distance, no doubt out on a whale and dolphin sightseeing trip.

‘I’m happy, yeah. I’m happy.’

Amber rested her chin on her knees as she looked at him. ‘Really?’

He finally turned to face her again. ‘What is this, Amber? I came over for a chat not a frigging interrogation. Things are fine and I’m happy, end of story.’ He closed his eyes for a second, taking a deep breath, and although Amber badly wanted to continue grilling him over his slightly erratic moods, she thought better of it. Whatever was on his mind he quite obviously didn’t want to go into it here. Not yet, anyway. But she’d get it out of him, eventually. She always did.

‘Right,’ he sighed, leaning over to quickly kiss her forehead, giving her hand a small squeeze before standing up, shoving both his hands in his pockets. ‘I’ll see you later.’

‘Where are you going?’

‘For a walk. Clear my head before we set off for the match.’

Amber watched as he headed back into the hotel, still frowning slightly. Something didn’t seem right, but she wasn’t going to push it.

Grabbing a short, bright pink kaftan from the table by her side, she pulled it over her head and stood up, smoothing it down over her white bikini. She was tired of sitting out in the sun now. Being out here on her own was only giving her far too much time to think about things, to dwell on stuff that she shouldn’t really be dwelling on, stuff that wasn’t important. Stuff that didn’t matter. And some stuff that did.

She was missing Debbie, too. She’d never really had a close female friend before, not until she’d met Debbie Hogan – part-time glamour model, North East socialite, gossip columnist, and new wife of Gary Blandford, Newcastle Red Star’s top defender and Ryan Fisher’s best friend. When she’d first met Debbie just a few months ago, Amber had thought there was no way the two of them could, or would, ever get on – Debbie was, more or less, your ‘typical’ WAG, if there really was such a thing, because Amber was beginning to think there wasn’t. Not really. Her attitude towards the women who shared the lives of these sometimes overpaid, cosseted, egotistical men had certainly changed after everything she’d been through with Ryan. And Debbie had become a friend Amber loved like a sister now. There were things she could talk to her about that she couldn’t share with anyone else, not even Ronnie, and especially not Jim. And right now, Amber missed her. Right now, Amber needed her.

Breathing an inner sigh of relief as the cool, air-conditioned interior of the hotel hit her, Amber strode towards the elevator, hoping with all her heart that Jim was in their room. She really wanted to spend just a little bit more time with him, on their own, before work took over once again, because sometimes she felt a little bit like she was still living in that glorious honeymoon period, and she was scared to let that feeling go. Scared to let reality back in.

Sliding her key card into the lock on the door of the hotel suite that had been their home for the past few days, she closed it behind her and walked inside, throwing her beach bag down onto the floor and pulling off her kaftan, casting it aside as she continued to walk through into the bedroom.

He was sitting on the edge of the bed, her handsome husband, flicking through a pile of papers, his mobile phone close beside him, a frown covering his face.

‘You okay?’ Amber asked, watching as he lifted his head, his frown quickly turning into a smile.

‘I am now.’

She smiled back, climbing onto the bed and kneeling up behind him, sliding her arms around his shoulders, kissing the back of his neck. ‘You look tired,’ she said, slowly beginning to massage his shoulders, feeling the knot of tension below her fingers as she kneaded deep. ‘And you feel so tense.’

He threw his head back, still holding onto the papers he’d been flicking through. ‘I’m fine, honey.’

She continued to knead his shoulders, listening to his quiet moans as her fingers pressed harder. ‘What are you looking at?’ she asked, resting her chin on the top of his head. He quickly turned the papers over, placing them on the bed beside him, his hand palm-down on top of them.

‘Just work stuff. Nothing important.’

It was Amber’s turn to frown at the way he’d quickly hidden those papers from her view. But maybe he just didn’t want to talk about work anymore. That would be understandable. ‘Anyway,’ she said, shrugging it off. ‘How about trying to ease that tension just a little bit more, huh?’

‘What you got in mind?’ He smiled, closing his eyes as her thumbs stroked the back of his neck in small, circular motions.

She stopped what she was doing for a second, untying her bikini top and throwing it onto the floor before pressing her naked breasts against his back, running her hands up and down his arms as she rested her chin on his shoulder. ‘Oh, I don’t know. You got any ideas?’

He gave a low, sexy laugh. ‘Get over here. I need to look at you.’

She slid round in front of him, climbing astride him, pushing her breasts out as an invitation for him to touch her because, oh God, she wanted to be touched. She wanted him to touch her so badly.

‘Jesus, Amber,’ he groaned, running his fingers ever-so-lightly over her nipples, his eyes watching their every movement. ‘I don’t think I’d have got through this trip without you here.’

‘Yeah, you would,’ she breathed, throwing her head back as his fingers pressed harder against her naked breasts before travelling slowly down her body, trailing over her stomach, stroking her hips. ‘You’d have managed.’

‘You know that for sure, do you?’ he whispered, his lips lightly brushing the base of her throat as he began slowly untying the sides of her bikini bottoms, pulling them away from her so she was completely naked.

‘You’d have found some way of relieving the tension.’ She smiled, burying her fingers in his hair as his mouth covered one of her breasts, his tongue flicking over her nipple, sending her stomach on another major somersaulting session.

The time for talking was over. They both knew where this was heading now.

She could feel his erection hard against her, ready and waiting to fill her up, and she reached down to free him, taking him in her hand, gasping as her fingers wrapped themselves around him. His groans turned her on even more, her need to have him inside her growing by the second, so when he lifted her up slightly, she made no attempt to fight the inevitable, lowering herself back down onto him, guiding him in with her hand.

‘Oh Jesus, Amber…’ he groaned as he slipped inside her. She was so wet it took no force at all, no effort to push his way in. ‘You have no idea how much I need this right now.’

She threw her head back again as she rode him hard and fast, feeling him slip in and out of her in a beautiful, almost painful rhythm, her fingers buried in his hair as he thrust deep into her. She really couldn’t live without this man. She’d tried – for nearly two decades she’d tried – but despite thinking she’d put him to the back of her mind, laid all those ghosts to rest, she’d only really been kidding herself. He’d taken her at such a young age, and his hold had never loosened its grip. She was caught in his trap, entangled in his web, and there was no place else she’d rather be.

Within minutes she could feel that tingle begin to appear, start its climb, slowly turning from a delicious shiver into a tidal wave of exquisite pins and needles as he pushed deeper, taking her to that beautiful precipice before tipping her over the edge in a wave of pleasure and pain that engulfed her completely, making her cry out loud.

Oh God, she loved this man. She loved him so much. They had so many lost years to catch up on, and Amber wanted to make sure that, this time, nothing was wasted. No opportunities were overlooked or lost. She couldn’t afford for that to happen. She wanted to be with this man forever. And she wanted everything he could give her. Everything.

‘I love you so much, Jim,’ she whispered, her face buried in his hair as their bodies shuddered to a halt, his arms falling around her. He was still inside her, and Amber wanted him to stay there, just for a little while. Just for a little bit longer. ‘I love you so much.’

‘Hey, I love you, too, baby,’ he said, gently stroking the small of her back in slow, rhythmic movements. ‘You drive me fucking crazy, I can’t begin to tell you…’

She pulled away slightly, closing her eyes as his mouth touched hers, kissing her in the most beautiful way – slowly and carefully, his mouth slightly open, his tongue touching hers. But she knew that if she didn’t make a move soon, didn’t leave this little bubble of theirs behind, she was never going to be able to concentrate on work. And that’s where she needed her head to be now.

‘I’d better go grab a shower.’ She smiled at him, running her fingers lightly over his cheek as she felt him finally leave her body, and the sudden wave of emptiness that one small action caused her to feel was quite shocking.

‘We’re gonna be okay, Amber. Me and you. We’re gonna be okay.’

She just smiled at him again as she stood up, running her fingers through her hair, and Jim watched as she walked into the bathroom, naked and beautiful, and his. She was all his. Finally. And he loved her so much it hurt like hell when she was out of his sight, when she wasn’t near. It had always been that way. All those years apart, out of her life; he’d always felt that way. And nothing he’d done to try and forget her had worked. Nothing.

Looking down at the pile of papers by his side, he picked them up and turned them back over, scanning the pages again, his stomach turning, making him feel slightly sick at the realisation of just how close Amber had come to seeing them.

He stood up and walked over to his briefcase that was lying next to the dressing table, lifting it up and flicking the catches to open it, throwing the papers inside and slamming the case shut, locking it quickly. He was married to the woman of his dreams; the only woman he’d ever really loved – the only woman he’d allowed himself to love – and that meant there should be no secrets, not anymore. In fact, he’d promised her there’d be no more secrets. He’d promised her that, even though she’d asked him never to promise her anything ever again, after what he’d done to her all those years ago. So maybe it would have been better if he’d let her see the papers. It would have brought forward a situation he was dreading having to face; but it had to happen. And soon. He couldn’t avoid it. He had to tell her, she had to know. He had no choice now anyway. Events and circumstances had seen to that. Circumstances he’d known had been coming, but he’d chosen to bury his head in the sand and delay the inevitable.

But here, in Tenerife, it just wasn’t the time or the place to tell Amber everything. He’d wait until they were back home. He’d waited this long, another few days wasn’t going to make any difference. It wasn’t going to change the situation.

It was almost time to get everything out in the open once and for all; to prove to her that he had nothing left to hide. But he had been hiding something. And how she reacted to that was something Jim didn’t even want to think about.

‘Have I been doing okay?’ Amber asked, her heart beating ten to the dozen as she called Debbie back home in Newcastle after the game, which Newcastle Red Star had won 4-0, despite the humid evening and still relatively high temperatures. But even though they were on foreign soil, Tenerife was a holiday destination, and they were playing in the south of the island, which was a Mecca for British tourists. So the crowd had largely been made up of British supporters – holiday-makers and ex-pats, mainly – which had helped with the atmosphere. At times it had almost felt like a home game. ‘I’ve been so nervous, Debbie. I swear I was almost sick just before I went live to the studio for the first time last week, it’s ridiculous! I mean, like Ronnie said, it’s not as though I haven’t done this before. I’ve been working in TV for years now…’

‘Amber, chick, slow down, will you? Take a deep breath and slow down. You’ve been more than okay, do you hear me? I’ve watched all the games, and you’ve been doing great. Me and the girls, we’re all over at Tanya’s place tonight because she’s just had a brand new Smart TV fitted on the living room wall, you should see the size of it… anyway, everybody said the same – you’re a natural!’

Amber breathed out a long, loud sigh of relief, closing her eyes as she leaned back against the wall. ‘Really? You’re not just saying that because you’re my friend?’

‘No. I’m not just saying it. You’re so good at what you do, hon. You put the rest of us to shame, I mean, you’re the only one of us with a proper job, for starters.’

Amber couldn’t help but smile. ‘You’ve got a “proper” job, as you put it, Debbie.’

‘What? Writing a small column for a celebrity gossip magazine?’

‘Not just any celebrity gossip magazine though, Debs. The most popular celebrity gossip magazine there is. And you’ve got your modelling. You work just as hard as me, in different ways, that’s all.’

Debbie laughed, and Amber wished she could just pop over to her place right now, open a bottle of something white and sparkling and settle down for a good, long chat. Because Amber really needed to talk to her about something. Something that had been preying on her mind for a few weeks now, and she couldn’t shake it, couldn’t stop thinking about it. And it wasn’t something she wanted to bring up with Jim. Not yet, anyway.

‘You know what I mean,’ Debbie said. ‘And, at the risk of sounding shallow – but this is a very valid point, I think – you looked fabulous! Whoever did your hair and make-up is a true artist. Those eyes… And did you pick your own outfit?’

‘Debbie, I work for a sports channel, not E! Entertainment. Of course I picked my own outfit. You don’t think Ronnie and the guys have stylists, do you?’

‘I don’t know, do I? They should do. The state of them sometimes.’

Now it was Amber’s turn to laugh. She knew that calling Debbie straight after the game would be a good idea. She always had a knack of cheering her up, or taking her mind off things, and now was no exception.

‘So, those black, leather-look skinny jeans are yours, then?’

‘Yes,’ Amber laughed, unable to keep the surprised tone out of her voice. ‘What are you trying to say, missy?’

‘My influence must be rubbing off on you.’

Amber just knew she would have had the biggest smirk on her face when she’d said that.

‘What you up to now?’ Debbie asked. ‘Are you finished for the night?’

‘Yeah, thankfully. I’m shattered! I think Jim and I are off out for dinner somewhere. Alone, hopefully.’

‘How are things with you and Ryan? Have you spoken to him much since you’ve been over there?’

‘Bar the interviews I’ve done with him whilst we’ve been here, no. I’ve hardly said two words to him to be honest. It’s not that I’ve been avoiding him or anything, the opportunity just hasn’t been there, that’s all.’ There was just the tiniest hint of a little white lie, but there was no need for Debbie to know that.

‘And there’s no awkwardness?’

‘No. Why should there be? It’s been months since me and him… since it all happened, Debbie. It’s in the past now. We’ve both moved forward.’

‘Yeah. Yeah, you have.’

Amber was slightly distracted by the sound of voices – Ryan’s being one of them – getting closer. ‘I’m gonna have to go now, Debs.’

‘Okay, chick. I’ll see you in a couple of days.’

‘Yeah. And I can’t wait. I’m dying for a girly catch-up.’

‘Me too, hon. See you soon!’

Amber quickly ended the call but wasn’t fast enough to make her escape before Ryan and Gary pushed their way through the double doors she’d been standing beside. She couldn’t really run away now, could she?

‘Hey, Amber.’ Gary smiled at her, and she returned it.

‘I’ve just been talking to your wife.’

‘She okay?’ Gary asked. ‘Behaving herself, I hope.’

‘She’s at Tanya’s, with the rest of the girls. They’ve been watching the match.’

‘Yeah, sure,’ Gary laughed. ‘Since when were any of that lot interested in what we do? They’re just interested in the money we make.’

‘You need to give them a bit more credit, Gary.’ Amber tucked her phone into the back pocket of her jeans. ‘They’re not quite as superficial as you all seem to think they are.’

Gary just let out a derisive snort, said something to Ryan that Amber didn’t catch, and walked away, throwing Amber a wink over his shoulder. Amber narrowed her eyes and glared at him, slowly shaking her head.

‘You avoiding me?’ Ryan asked. An afternoon spent sampling the delights of the gorgeous Ellen still hadn’t managed to stop him from hoping he’d bump into Amber after the match. Okay, so he’d spoken to her in a professional capacity over the past few days, in a couple of interviews for TV, but he’d wanted to catch her alone. And right now, as he looked at her, all crazy red hair and piercing pale blue eyes, every memory all those hours with Ellen had managed to erase came flooding back tenfold.

Amber swung round, her eyes instantly meeting his. ‘No. No, of course I’m not avoiding you.’

‘It feels like you are.’

‘What do you want me to do, Ryan? Actively seek you out for regular get-togethers?’

He stuck his hands in his pockets, turning away from her for a second. ‘It just feels … ’ He looked at her again. ‘I don’t know… It just feels as though, what we had… it feels like it never happened sometimes, that’s all.’

‘Yeah, well, there’s been a lot of water under the bridge since then,’ Amber said quietly. It was hard to forget what she’d once felt for this man, and maybe she didn’t really want to. ‘So much has happened.’

‘Tell me about it,’ Ryan sighed, pushing a hand through his hair. He really didn’t want to still be feeling this way, but he couldn’t help it, couldn’t push those feelings down, no matter how hard he tried.

‘Are you… is everything okay, Ryan?’ Despite everything, she’d never stopped caring about him. She couldn’t do that, couldn’t just switch those feelings off, even after all these months.

‘Everything’s fine,’ he replied, his eyes meeting hers again. ‘It would just be nice to talk to you sometimes, without it having to be under the guise of a TV interview.’

‘That’s my job, Ryan.’

He just looked at her, and she stared back at him. He was so handsome, so young. So dangerous. She only hoped he’d learned enough lessons to allow him not to let history repeat itself. Again.

‘I’m married now, Ryan. You do understand that, don’t you?’

‘Don’t treat me like a kid, Amber. Yeah, I know you’re married. It’s bloody hard to ignore that fact when all you do is wrap yourself around the boss twenty-four-seven…’ Now he was thinking aloud. Not the best idea.

‘Do you know how childish you sound? If you can’t act like a grown-up…’ She turned to walk away but he grabbed her wrist, swinging her back round.

‘I’m sorry. I’m sorry, okay?’

‘Yeah. You should be.’ She pulled her arm free of his grip, rubbing her wrist. ‘Look, I know things are still a bit weird…’

‘I just want us to be friends, Amber. That’s all. I want us to be able to talk to each other and forget the past; put it behind us.’

She looked into his eyes. Kind eyes. Yeah, he really had changed over these past few months. Or that was the impression he was giving off, anyway. ‘And you think we can do that, do you?’ she said quietly, suddenly realising that this was the first time she’d really spoken to him – properly spoken to him – in weeks. He was right. All that time and the only talking she’d ever done with him had been because she’d had to – to interview him. Professional purposes only. Had that been deliberate on her part? All those months and this was the first real conversation she’d had with him. That thought flooded her with guilt, because he really hadn’t deserved that.

‘I think we can try,’ he replied, his eyes still fixed firmly on hers.

‘Ryan… I am so sorry. I am so, so sorry. I just…’ She sighed, leaning back against the wall, pushing a hand through her hair. ‘Maybe I just didn’t know how to handle it all. How to handle being around you. I mean, it’s still so complicated…’

‘It doesn’t have to be.’

‘Doesn’t it?’

He smiled, and Amber felt her stomach give a small but noticeable jolt. ‘I just want us to be friends. Nothing more, no ulterior motive. I promise.’

‘Yeah, well, you know how I feel about promises.’ She was aware of Jim’s voice somewhere nearby, and despite what Ryan had just told her, she still didn’t want Jim to think Ryan may be playing some kind of game. She wasn’t altogether sure how much Jim trusted Ryan. They’d never really talked about him – about what he and Amber had shared. And maybe that had been a mistake, too. Maybe they should have been more open, about everything. ‘Look, I’ve got to go, Ryan. I’ll see you later, okay?’

He nodded. ‘Yeah. Okay. Oh, and Amber?’

She turned round to look at him.

‘I’m happy for you. Really.’

If he said that out loud enough times then he might actually start to believe he meant it because, right now, he wasn’t altogether sure that he did. Of course he wanted her to be happy – after what he’d put her through it was the least she deserved. But it still hurt to think that, had it not been for his sheer stupidity, they could have been happy together. They’d come so close, so fucking close.

‘Why did you do it?’ Ryan whispered to himself as he watched her walk down the corridor, over to her husband. He watched as his boss smiled at her, kissing her quickly, sliding an arm around her waist as they talked, both of them totally unashamed of showing how much in love they were. ‘Why?’

But Ryan knew the answer to that. And as much as he would have liked to turn the clock back and rewrite history, he couldn’t. He just had to get on with his life, the way she was getting on with hers, and he would. He’d start doing just that.

Making his way down the corridor to join the rest of the team as they celebrated their win over CD Adeje, one of Spain’s most popular clubs, despite not being in the very top flight of Spanish football, he recalled a short and totally unexpected conversation he’d had just before the game. A conversation he’d thought nothing of, in fact, he’d just laughed it off as something flattering but highly unlikely to ever happen. However, seeing Amber just now, it made him think again. Maybe it wasn’t such a stupid idea after all. Maybe it was exactly what he needed. Maybe he shouldn’t dismiss it out of hand altogether.

Decision made. He just hoped it was the right one.