Читать книгу Before We Say Goodbye: Preparing for a Good Death - Ray Simpson - Страница 17

The faces of death leer at us through life. The face of fear may lurk in the background, and then suddenly loom large. It is likely to do this when we face the unknown, danger, pain, loss of security or mobility, and ultimately extinction. Such fear mars our lives. D.H. Lawrence wrote, ‘The English … are paralysed by fear … That is what thwarts and distorts the Anglo-Saxon existence … Shakespeare is morbid with fear, fear of consequences.’

This condition is not limited to the English, of course. What is the answer? If we name the fear and bring it out into the light of day, it recedes. So name the fear, then drag it into the centre of an imaginary circle of love. ‘Perfect love casts out fear,’ writes Saint John. Watch it diminish. Only by journeying to the places of greatest fear will we discover the source of strength that is stronger even than death.

Another face of death is loneliness. This is not the same as solitude, which contains no loss of wellbeing. Some cope by clinging to a person, place or project, but all these will come to an end. Where will we be then?

Others disguise this inner loneliness by whizzing around, getting hooked on virtual reality, or by being glued to chat sites on the web. All these will come to an end. Where will we be then?

Only by journeying into the place of greatest loneliness will we rise above a life of subterfuges. Bring your loneliness into that same circle of love.

A third face of death is anger due to loss of ego control. Abusive, pushy or defensive behaviour is a sign of this. Racism is another sign. Some cope by forming addictive habits, or by making success their god. But these things have feet of clay. When these crumble, where will we be?

Only by journeying into the place of loss of control can we find lasting freedom.

There are other faces of death, such as despair and pretence. These, too, if they are to lose their hold over us, have to be named, owned and brought into the circle of love.