Читать книгу One Summer At The Ranch: The Wyoming Cowboy / A Family for the Rugged Rancher / The Man Who Had Everything - Rebecca Winters, Christine Rimmer - Страница 15
ОглавлениеIt was the second time Tracy’s son had expressed the very sentiment she felt. She had to admit she was enjoying this trip a lot more than she’d anticipated. But along with this newfound excitement, her guilt was increasing.
Strictly speaking, it wasn’t the guilt some war widows experienced, making them cling to the memory of their husbands. The love she and Tony shared would always be in her heart. They’d talked about the possibility of his dying, and she’d promised him she would move on if—heaven forbid—something happened to him. Since that horrible day, she’d been doing her best to make a full life for herself and Johnny.
This was a different kind of guilt, because she didn’t feel guilty about enjoying Carson’s company. To be honest, she was attracted to him. Very attracted.
Her biggest fear was that he’d already sensed it. Last night he’d sounded relieved after they’d had their talk. As he’d explained, when he and his friends had put their plan into action, they’d done it purely to brighten up the lives of a few families affected by the war.
Neither Carson nor his friends wanted or expected some love-starved woman with a child to come on to them because she’d lost her husband. The thought had to have crossed his mind when they’d first met at the airport.
According to Carson, the three men had been bachelors when they’d joined the Marines. And they were still living that lifestyle outside of this special project that was bringing so much joy to Johnny’s life. Since Tracy couldn’t help what they were thinking, there was no point in being embarrassed. What she needed to do was be friends with all of them, the way she was with Tony’s brothers. That was going to be especially hard when she was around Carson, but she could do it. And she would!
“Mom—there’s the lake!”
Johnny’s exultant cry jolted her back to the moment. They’d moved on ahead of her. “Good for you for finding it! Does it look like Lake Erie with lots of barges and a lighthouse?” she teased.
“Heck, no. It’s little, with pine trees all around it.”
She smiled. “Can you see any fish?”
“Can you?” she heard him ask Carson. Oh, Johnny. Her son was so predictable.
“See all those dark things moving around?”
“Yeah.”
“The lake is full of rainbow trout.”
“I don’t see their rainbows.”
“You will when you catch one.” Carson was ever the patient teacher. “We’ll cook it for your dinner tonight.”
“Won’t there be anything else to eat?” was her son’s forlorn reply.
Carson’s laughter warmed new places inside her. “We’ve got lots of stuff.”
“That’s good.”
Tracy drew closer to them.
“Hey—I can see some tents and a table! Someone else is camping here.” He didn’t sound happy about that.
Carson laughed again. “Yup. That someone is you, partner. Those tents have already been set up for us.”
“Whoa!”
“Maybe you’d like to sleep in that three-man tent with Sam and Rachel.”
“Oh, yeah. I forgot they were coming. Where will you sleep?”
“Right next to you guys in my tent.”
“What about my mom?”
“There’s a tent for her and one for the Harrises. The one on the end is for Buck.”
“But there are six tents.”
“Yup. The extra one is where we keep the food and all the supplies we’ll need. After we take care of the horses, we’ll fix ourselves some lunch.”
“Goody.”
Their entertaining conversation was music to Tracy’s ears. She finally broke through the heavy cover of pines to discover a small body of deep green water bathed by the sun. “This place looks enchanted.”
While Carson put out some hay and water for the horses, he slanted her a hooded look. “It is.”
She felt a shiver run through her. They’d already dismounted and he’d removed the saddles and bags.
“Come over here, Mom. I’ll tie your reins to this tree the way Carson showed me.”
“Such wonderful service deserves a kiss.” She got down off her horse and planted one on her son’s cheek.
“The latrine is around the other side in the trees, away from the camping area,” he informed her.
Latrine. Since their arrival in Jackson, Johnny’s vocabulary must have increased by a couple of hundred words at least. He was becoming a veritable fount of knowledge.
“Thanks. I’ll keep that in mind.” Without being asked, Tracy picked up their bags. “I’ll take these.”
“Put mine in the big tent.”
“Didn’t you forget to say something?”
“Oh, yeah. Please. I forgot.”
“I know, but it’s so much nicer when you remember.”
Carson’s eyes smiled at her before she started walking along the tree-lined shore toward the tents pitched some distance away. She undid the tie on the screen and entered the big one where three sleeping bags and extra blankets were rolled out. It was getting hot out, but the temperature inside was still pleasant.
She emptied his saddlebag and put his things in little stacks against the side of his sleeping bag. Then she left and picked out one of the other tents for herself. It didn’t take her long to unpack.
When she emerged, she discovered Carson putting out picnic food on the camp table beneath some pine boughs to give them shade. Johnny had the duty of setting up the camp chairs.
Tracy approached them and looked all around. “With the smell of the pines so strong, this is what I call heaven on earth.” She eyed her son. “Do you know how lucky we are, Johnny? Can you believe Carson and his friends have gone to all this trouble for us? We’re going to have to think of something really special to do for them.”
“I know.”
They settled down to eat.
“Guess what?” Carson said after swallowing his second roast beef sandwich. “You’ve already done something special.”
Johnny stopped chewing on his sandwich. “No, we haven’t.”
“Want to bet? You accepted our invitation to come. We hoped you and your mom would like the idea.” He darted her a penetrating glance. “That’s all the payment we needed.”
Carson.
“At first I didn’t want to.” Her son was nothing if not honest.
“I don’t blame you. I’d have been scared to go someplace where I’d never been before. I think you were very brave to come.”
“I’m not brave, but my mom is.”
“She sure is.” In an unexpected gesture, Carson pulled out his phone and clicked on the photo gallery. “Now take a look at this.” He handed it to Johnny.
“That’s me riding Goldie!”
“Yup. How many kids do you know your age who can go on a trail ride in the mountains on their own pony?” Tracy hadn’t seen him take a picture. She was amazed. Had he taken one of her, too?
Johnny’s brown gaze switched from the photo to study Carson. “I don’t know any.”
“Neither do I. So don’t ever tell me Tony Baretta’s son isn’t brave.” Carson’s expression grew serious. “You’re just like your dad and I’m proud to know you.”
The conviction in his tone shook Tracy to the core and affected Johnny to the point of tears. They didn’t fall, but they shimmered on the tips of his lashes with every heartbeat. “I’m proud of you, too. You’re sick all the time and still do everything.”
If Tracy wasn’t mistaken, Carson’s eyes had a suspicious sheen. As for herself, a huge lump had lodged in her throat.
“If everyone’s finished eating, what do you say we put the rest of the food in the bear locker and go for a swim? Remember we have to fasten it tight. Occasionally a black bear or a grizzly forages through this area, but unlikely you’ll ever see one.”
Johnny looked at Tracy. “Don’t worry, Mom. Carson brought bear spray. He’ll keep us safe.”
She lifted her gaze to a pair of blue eyes that blinded her with their intensity. “I have no doubt of it.”
The three of them made short work of cleaning up and went to their respective tents to change into their bathing suits. When Johnny was dressed, he came running with his beach sandals and towel to her tent. She’d put a beach cover-up over her one-piece blue floral suit.
Before leaving Sandusky, she’d searched half a dozen shops to find something modest. Other women didn’t mind being scantily clad, but she wasn’t comfortable walking around like that.
Once she’d covered them in sunscreen, she grabbed her towel and they both left the tent in search of Carson. He’d beaten them to the shore and was blowing up a huge inner tube with a pump. Johnny squealed in delight.
The only thing more eye-catching than the sight of this pristine mountain lake was Carson Lundgren dressed in nothing more than his swimming trunks. Tracy had trouble not staring at such an amazing, hard-packed specimen of male beauty.
She felt his keen gaze play over her before he said, “Johnny? I want you to wear the life jacket I left on the table. Even if you’re a good swimmer, I’ll feel much better if you wear it while we’re out here. Don’t be fooled by this lake. You can only wade in a few feet, then it drops off fast to thirty feet.”
Johnny’s dark head swung around. “Okay.” He ran over and put it on. Tracy made sure he’d fastened it correctly.
“I think we’re ready!” Carson announced. He tossed the tube in the water, then dove in and came up in the center with a lopsided smile that knocked her off balance. “Come on in, and we’ll go for a ride.”
Johnny needed no urging and started running. Tracy threw off her cover-up and followed him in. “Oh—this water’s colder than I thought!”
“It’s good for you,” Carson said, and then promptly coughed. The moment was so funny she was still laughing when he helped her and Johnny to grab on to the tube. Once they were all comfortable, he propelled them around.
They must have been out there close to an hour, soaking up the sun and identifying wildlife. Sometimes they swam away from the tube. Carson flew through the water like a fish and played games with them. When everyone was exhausted, they went back to shore to dry off and get a cold drink.
“I think it’s time for a little rest.”
“But Mom, I have to go talk to Goldie. She’s missed me.”
“You can see her in a little while. Come on. It’s time to get out of the sun.”
“What are you going to do, Carson?”
He’d been coughing. “I’ve got a few phone calls to make, partner. It won’t be long before Buck arrives with the Harrises.”
Tracy didn’t know how he was able to spend so much time with them when he had the whole operation of his cattle ranch to worry about. “Thank you for another wonderful day, Carson.”
He flicked her a shuttered glance. “It’s only half over.”
She knew that, yet the fact that he’d mentioned it filled her with fresh excitement. With an arm around Johnny, Tracy walked him to her tent, but stopped by his to get him a change of clothes. Once he was dressed, he lay down on top of her roomy sleeping bag. After she got dressed, she joined him. In two seconds, he was asleep.
Tracy lay there wondering if Carson’s calls were all business. Since he’d come home from war, surely he’d been with women he’d met in Jackson or through his business contacts, even if it hadn’t been an official date. That would go for his friends, too. Any woman lucky enough to capture his interest would be wondering why he hadn’t been as available lately.
When she realized where her thoughts had wandered, she sat up, impatient with herself for caring what he did in his off time. She was supposed to be thinking of him as a friend, but her feelings weren’t remotely like anything she felt for her brothers-in-law.
He would have been a charmer during the years he was competing in the rodeo. He had to be driving a lot of women crazy, these days, too. Carson was driving one woman crazy right here on the ranch and she didn’t know what to do about it. Tracy had to admit those blue eyes and the half smile he sometimes flashed were playing havoc with her emotions.
After she’d met Tony, nothing had kept her from responding to him in an open, free way. Now, she had a son who came first in her life and the situation with Carson was so different it was almost painful. If he had feelings for her—sometimes, when he looked at her, she felt that he did—he hadn’t acted on them. But then again, he was naturally kind and generous. She didn’t dare read more into a smile or an intense look than was meant. He’d told her that she and Johnny were their guinea pigs.
The daunting thought occurred to her that Carson’s emotions weren’t invested, which explained why he never did anything overtly personal. Next month, another family devastated by the war would be arriving. He and his friends would welcome them and be as kind and attentive as they’d been to Johnny and her.
Maybe he’d meet a widow this summer who would be so desirable to him, he’d reach out to her because he couldn’t help himself. Tracy groaned. What kind of woman might she be?
Tomorrow was Tuesday, and they only had four more days here. With her attraction to Carson growing, she’d found herself dreading the march of time, just like Johnny. But it suddenly dawned on her that without some signal from him, those days would seem like a lifetime.
Another worse thought intruded when she heard voices in the distance. Johnny heard them, too, and sat up, rubbing his eyes. She reached for her watch, which she’d taken off to go swimming. It was four-thirty. Buck appeared to have arrived with the others.
What if Carson had picked up on certain vibes from Tracy and had been including the Harris family in all their activities to keep everything on an even keel?
Was it true?
Maybe she was wrong, since she didn’t know Carson’s mind, but she cringed to think it could be a possibility.
“Hey, Johnny!” Sam was right outside her tent. “What are you doing? We’re going swimming!”
“I’m coming, but I’ve got to get my suit back on!”
“Okay. Hurry!”
Off came his clothes. Soon he was ready. “Aren’t you coming, Mom?”
“In a minute. You go on.”
In case Carson was up for more play time in the lake, she decided against going swimming again. Grabbing her hairbrush and Johnny’s beach towel, she left the tent and walked toward the others. Monica and Ralph waved to her. They were already in the water with the inner tube. “Come on in!”
“I just barely got out! How was the balloon ride?”
“Fantastic! You should try it before you leave the Tetons.”
“Maybe I will!”
The children were clustered around Carson and Buck, who were handing out life jackets. She sat down in a camp chair, ostensibly to keep an eye on the children. But it was hard to focus when there were two tall, well-built ex-marines ready to enter the water. She finally closed her eyes and gave her damp hair a good brushing while she soaked in the heat.
* * *
THE COLOR OF Tracy’s hair shimmering in the sun was indescribable. The fine strands could be real silver and gold intertwined. While the kids played with the Harrises, Carson kept his eyes above the waterline to take in the curves of her exquisitely proportioned body.
Buck emerged from the depths next to him, coughing up a storm. “I agree she’s quite a sight,” he whispered when he’d caught a breath. “When are you going to do something about it?”
“Is it that obvious?”
“Not to anyone but me and Ross.”
“We didn’t invite her family to the ranch for me to make a pass.”
Buck scowled. “Hey, it’s me you’re talking to. I damn well know that. Tell me the truth. You haven’t gotten any signals from her that she’d like you to?”
“I don’t know. It’s hard to read her. She’s warm and friendly enough when she’s with Johnny, which is most of the time.”
“Maybe we need to arrange something this evening so she isn’t with him. Time is fleeting. Saturday will be here before you know it.”
Carson threw back his head. “Thanks for making my day, Buck.”
“Just trying to help things along for a buddy.”
“Sorry for snapping.”
“Forget it. There’s only one cure for your problem. I’ll tell ghost stories in the kids’ tent after everyone goes to bed. No adults allowed. While the Harrises retire to their tent, you and Tracy can sit around and talk. That ought to give you plenty of time to get creative.”
“She’ll probably go to her tent.”
After a pause Buck said, “Like I said, get creative and follow her.”
“That’s been my idea since the moment we set up camp.”
“Then I don’t see a problem.”
“I wish I didn’t.”
“Don’t let me down, buddy. You take first watch tonight and see where it leads. Wake me up when it’s my turn.” Buck did a backflip away from him and swam underwater to surprise the kids.
That was easy enough for his friend to say, but Carson intended to follow through, all the same. The hourglass was emptying every second. He needed to mind his grandfather’s advice when he’d been teaching Carson how to wrestle steers. “Put your fear away and seize the moment without hesitation, otherwise the opportunity is lost.”
Tonight might be one of the few opportunities left to find out what was going on inside her. Armed with a plan, it helped him get through the rest of the evening.
While Carson and Buck explained why they were wearing canisters of oxygen and masks, Ralph Harris volunteered to build a small fire along the shoreline away from everyone. It would help them to avoid breathing too much smoke.
Instead of rainbow trout, they served roasted Teton hot dogs and Snake River marshmallows. The menu was a huge hit and met with Johnny’s wholehearted approval.
With their meal finally over, Carson put the food away. Ralph volunteered to douse the fire and make sure there’d be no sparks. Now that it was time for bed, Buck made his exciting announcement and the children scurried to the big tent for stories.
The Harrises eventually said good-night. Before Tracy could say the same thing, Carson told her he’d walk her to the latrine. “In case Bigfoot is lurking.”
“Carson!”
He stood chuckling at a distance until she came out. “Maybe you’d better sit with me and have a soda until you’re not so jumpy.”
“Are you intentionally trying to frighten me?”
His pulse rate sped up. “Is it working?”
“Yes.”
“That’s good. I don’t feel like being alone on a perfect night like this.”
“It’s incredible.”
He liked the sound of that. They walked back to the camp in companionable silence. Carson waited for her to tell him she really was tired and needed to go to bed. Instead she sat down near him, staring out at the water.
Before dinner she’d put on a navy pullover with long sleeves over her jeans. Everything she wore suited her. Earlier, while she’d been roasting her hot dog and the flames from the fire were turning to embers, they’d cast a glow that brought out the creamy beauty of her complexion. She’d left her hair free, flowing to her shoulders. It had a lot of natural curl. He’d never met a more feminine woman.
“Tracy?”
Her gaze swerved to his. “What is it? I can tell something’s on your mind.”
He’d been about as subtle as a sledgehammer. “How would you like to go into Jackson with me tomorrow night?”
“You mean me and Johnny?”
“No. Just you. I want to take you dancing.”
After a slight hesitation, she smiled. “I don’t recall that being listed on your brochure.”
He took a deep breath. Damn if it didn’t always cause him to cough. “It isn’t. I’m asking you out on a date, strictly off the record. If the answer’s no, tell me now and we’ll pretend I never brought it up.”
She looked pensive. “I’m afraid I’m not a very good dancer.”
Carson still hadn’t been given the right answer. As far as he was concerned, this evening was definitely over. He got to his feet, too filled with disappointment to sit still. “Do I take it that’s a no?”
“No!”
His heart gave a big kick at her emphatic response. “So it’s a yes?”
“Yes, but let me warn you now, I’m out of practice.”
“It’s been a while for me, too.” He studied her classic features in the near darkness. “If you remember, we listed babysitting on the brochure. Do you think Johnny could handle that?”
“I think he could, but I’d rather feel out Monica. Maybe we can trade nights. If she’s willing to let Johnny stay at their cabin tomorrow night, I’ll tend her children at mine the following night.”
It thrilled him that Tracy was so ready with a solution. He was beginning to get the impression she wanted this date as much as he did. Otherwise, she wouldn’t have agreed to go out alone with him. “Sounds like a plan that will make our little cowboys and girls happy.”
A gentle laugh escaped. “Johnny really likes them.”
“They’re great kids.” He reached for the flashlight on the table. “Plan on wearing something dressy.”
“I only brought one outfit that would qualify, but I didn’t think I’d wear it.”
“I’ll wear something a little dressier, too. Come on. It’s late. I’ll take you to your tent.”
“I’d appreciate that.” She got up and started walking. “Will you shine the light inside to make sure Bigfoot’s brother isn’t waiting for me?”
He smiled to himself. “I’ll do that and one better. Buck and I are taking turns tonight keeping watch so everyone’s safe.” Once they reached her tent, he made a thorough inspection. “It’s all right to go in.”
As she stepped past him, their arms brushed. It was all he could do not to pull her to him.
She turned to him in the darkness. “Thank you for everything, Carson.” Her voice sounded husky. “With two ex-marines guarding each other and all of us, I won’t have a care in the world tonight.”
He needed to get away from her now. “Keep the flashlight with you. If Johnny wakes up and wants you, one of us will bring him to you. See you in the morning, Tracy.”
With the adrenalin pumping through him, Carson headed for the food tent and grabbed another flashlight from the box. Needing some exercise, he took a walk to check on the horses and make sure all was well.
Their little group had been making enough noise all day to scare off any bears. But on the off chance that one was hungry enough to come around and investigate, he was taking every precaution to safeguard their guests. The thought of anything happening to Tracy or Johnny in his care was anathema to him. He’d never had such intense feelings before.
With time on his hands, he got on the phone and chatted with Ross. They talked about plans for the rest of the week. There were bookings for regular guests extending into August already. It appeared their brainchild was showing the promise of success.
This kind of news should make Carson happy. It was making him happy, but he had two people on his mind who were sleeping in tents very close to him. He was going out of his mind thinking about them leaving so soon and told Ross as much. That’s when he heard a child’s voice cry out, “Mom—”
It could have been any one of the three children. “Ross? One of the kids is awake. Got to go.”
He took off for the bigger tent and almost ran into Buck who was holding Johnny’s hand. The second the little guy saw him, he cried Carson’s name and ran into his arms.
Carson got down on his haunches to hug him tight. “It’s okay, Johnny. You were just having a bad dream.”
“Mommy and I were at this big airport looking for you, but we couldn’t find you. I kept calling for you, but you never came. Then I couldn’t find my mom.”
Carson looked up at Buck who’d heard everything. They’d both assumed the ghost stories had given him nightmares. Maybe they had. But Carson had featured in this one and Johnny had been looking for him.
It seemed Carson wasn’t the only one hating the thought of Johnny and Tracy leaving the Tetons this coming weekend. The implication sent a shockwave through his body and wasn’t lost on Buck, either.
Mercifully, the other kids stayed asleep.
“I’ll take over now,” Buck murmured.
Carson nodded. “Come on, Johnny. Let’s go find your mom.”
The boy put a trusting hand in Carson’s and they walked to her tent. “Tracy?” he called to her from the opening. She stirred and sat up. “Johnny had a bad dream and wants to sleep with you.”
“Oh, honey, come here.” Johnny ran to her. Carson turned to leave, but Johnny’s cry stopped him. “Don’t go, Carson!” He sounded frantic.
“Johnny, Carson needs to go to his tent and get some sleep.”
“He can sleep right here by me. Please, Mommy. I don’t want him to leave.”
In order to avoid a bigger disturbance he said, “Tell you what, partner. I’ll stay here until you fall asleep. How’s that?”
“You promise you won’t go away?”
“Not until after I hear you snoring.”
“I don’t snore. Do I, Mom?”
She laughed softly. “Sometimes.”
Tracy turned on the flashlight to find the blanket. “I’m not using this, Carson. Why don’t you put this down next to Johnny.” She was wearing pajamas with little footballs on them and looked adorable.
As Johnny might say, this was the funnest sleepover in the whole world.
Carson arranged the blanket into a pillow and stretched out. Their close quarters made everything cozy.
Tracy kissed her boy who’d climbed into the sleeping bag with her. “Do you want me to leave the light on?”
“Heck, no. Carson’s here.”
Tears stung Carson’s eyes.
Tracy turned it off. “What kind of a bad dream was it?”
Johnny told her exactly what he’d told Carson.
He heard her deep sigh. “I’ve had dreams where I couldn’t find somebody.”
“You have?”
“Me, too,” Carson interjected.
“Well, we’re all here now and it’s time to go back to sleep.”
“Mom?”
“Yes?”
“I don’t want to go home.”
Carson’s heart skipped a beat.
“Shh. We’ll talk about it in the morning.”
“Promise?”
“Promise.”
“I love you, Mom.”
“I love you, honey.”
“Good night, Carson. I love you, too.”
Carson closed his eyes tightly. “The feeling’s mutual, partner. Good night.” What else could he have said that wouldn’t have upset Tracy?
When he’d had thoughts earlier in the day of being in the tent with her, he never dreamed he’d end up here in the middle of the night under these circumstances. In order to prove to her he wouldn’t take advantage of the situation, he waited until he could tell they were asleep, then he crept out of the tent. He found Buck sitting on one of the chairs with his legs propped on another one.
“Go to bed, Buck. I’ll never sleep tonight.”
“Why not, besides the obvious?”
Carson brought him up to speed. “I’m afraid this plan of ours may be backfiring big-time. We were supposed to give them a fun vacation, but now he says he doesn’t want to go home. I know you’re going to say he’ll get over it, but until he does, Tracy’s probably going to wish she’d never come.”
“Speaking of Tracy, what happened out there tonight when you two were alone?”
“I asked her to go dancing with me tomorrow night. She said yes.” The “yes” came out a little louder because he had to cough.
Buck moved his legs to the ground. “You weren’t really surprised, were you?”
“I don’t know. Ever since she got here, I’ve been turned inside out.”
He got to his feet and stretched. “Do you wish she hadn’t come?”
“If this becomes a nightmare for her because of Johnny, then yes. I have no doubt it was his father he was looking for.”
“I’m sure you’re right. It’s only natural. But she chose to accept our invitation. There’s a risk in everything and nothing’s perfect in this imperfect world. You have to know they’ve been having a wonderful time.”
“But at what cost?”
“That’s your old guilt talking, Carson. You’ve got to stop taking on what can’t be helped.”
Buck was right. “I don’t know how to do that.”
“It’s the only flaw I find in you. See you in the morning.”
