Читать книгу The Complete A–Z of Everything Carry On - Richard Webber - Страница 16

INT. BANK MANAGER’S OFFICE. DAY

C.S. of door, as Boggs is shown in.

CASHIER: Mr Boggs, sir.

(As Boggs comes in, carrying a briefcase, the manager gets up and comes into shot to greet him and we now see that it is the man who was in the football ground stand with a hearing aid. His name is Bulstrode and (like most bank managers these days) he treats his caller very warily at first.)

BULSTRODE: My dear Mr Boggs, how good to see you again. Do sit down, sit down.

BOGGS: Thank you, Mr Bulstrode. And how have you been?

BULSTRODE: Oh, not too bad. But you know how trying this business is these days. Credit squeezes … bank rate … overdrafts … it’s all very worrying.

BOGGS: Yes, yes, of course. In the circumstances, it must be a relief to know that it’s other people’s money you’re gambling with?

BULSTRODE: (Not sure about this.) Yes … well, and what can I do for you?

BOGGS: (Producing it.) I thought you’d like to see this contract we’ve just taken on. (Hands it over.) For nineteen thousand odd, as you’ll see …

BULSTRODE: Very good, Mr Boggs. Congratulations. This should put you well in credit again.

BOGGS: Thank you, Mr Bulstrode.

BULSTRODE: Yes, indeed. (Producing box.) A cigarette?

BOGGS: Thank you.

BULSTRODE: Just help yourself.

(Leaves open box in front of BOGGS and picks up telephone.)

BULSTRODE: Coffees please for myself and Mr Boggs.

(Replaces telephone.)

BULSTRODE: Well, this is very good news. Very good indeed.

BOGGS: I thought you’d be pleased.

BULSTRODE: I’m delighted, Mr Boggs. I don’t mind telling you I’ve always had complete confidence in the ability of your firm.

BOGGS: You’re too kind. Naturally there are one or two difficulties to be overcome yet.

BULSTRODE: (Getting wary again.) Yes?

BOGGS: As this is to be a completely new line for us, we’ll have to invest in new moulds and various other things which I won’t bother you with.

BULSTRODE: I understand, yes …

BOGGS: But a short term loan of … oh, fifteen hundred should cover it.

(BULSTRODE starts fiddling with his hearing aid.)

BULSTRODE: I don’t seem to be hearing you, Mr Boggs.

BOGGS: (Louder.) I shall require a short term loan of fifteen hundred pounds!

BULSTRODE: That’s what I thought you said! That’s quite impossible, Mr Boggs. You’re already in debt to us for too much as it is!

(He grabs the cigarette box, snaps lid shut and puts it back in his drawer.)

BULSTRODE: I cannot authorise any more. I hate to appear mean, Mr Boggs, but I’m sorry.

(And he picks up telephone again.)

BULSTRODE: Cancel that coffee!

BUMBLE, MAYOR FREDERICK

Played by Kenneth Connor

The mayor of Fircombe is seen in Girls. An ineffectual man who’s regarded as a joke around the streets of this seaside town, he’s booed off the stage while preparing to say a few words at the Miss Fircombe beauty contest. Married to Mildred, a slovenly woman who does little for his status in the town.

BUMBLE, MILDRED

Played by Patsy Rowlands

The frumpish wife of Frederick Bumble does little to improve her husband’s standing as mayor of Fircombe, a seaside town in desperate need of a makeover. A heavy smoker, who spends much of her time in the lavatory or slouching around in her slippers and dressing-gown, much to Frederick’s disgust, who classes her as an ‘old compost heap’. When she can’t take her husband’s pomposity any more, she joins Augusta Prodworthy’s women’s lib movement. Seen in Girls.

BUNG, DETECTIVE SERGEANT SIDNEY

Played by Harry H. Corbett

In charge of investigations into the disappearance of Doris Mann, the sixth woman to vanish from Hocombe Woods within the year. Unhappily married to Emily, he accepts any chance to return to work, and ends up leaving his wife to be looked after by Virula Watt, whom he meets while sorting out the Mann case. He appears in Screaming!

BUNG, EMILY

Played by Joan Sims

The miserable, nagging wife of Detective Sergeant Sidney Bung who ends up being turned into a mannequin in Screaming! Just to prove there was not the slightest whiff of romance left in their relationship, Sidney decided to leave her as a dummy when he had the chance to return her to normality, preferring the charms of Virula Watt instead.

BUNGHIT DIN

Played by Bernard Bresslaw

The leader of the Burpas who’s based in the hill town of Jacksi in Afghanistan. Seen in Up The Khyber causing confusion and mayhem for the men of the 3rd Foot and Mouth company.

BUNGHIT’S SERVANT

Played by David Spenser

As the Khasi and Bunghit are lounging, whilst Jelhi plays and sings in Up The Khyber, the servant enters and announces that the chiefs have arrived, opening their eyes to the fact that the ones they’ve been entertaining are impostors.

BUNN WARD

A ward in Finisham Maternity Hospital. Seen in Matron.

BUNNY WAITRESS

Played by Shirley Stelfox

Works at the Whippit Inn in At Your Convenience. While serving Lewis Boggs and Myrtle Plummer, who are dining out at the inn, Lewis doesn’t know where to look when she leans over in her low-cut bunny outfit.

BUREAU OF INTERNAL AFFAIRS

Based in Washington, the Commissioner of the Bureau is seen in Cowboy, initially enjoying a bit of fun with a woman in his office until interrupted by Perkins, his assistant. A former janitor at the law school Judge Burke attended, he responds to Burke’s request for a peace marshal at Stodge City but can’t find anyone to fill the position until Marshall P. Knutt walks in looking for a job. Assuming he’s actually a marshal, he packs him off to Stodge City.

BURGER, COMMANDANT

Played by Kenneth Williams

In charge of the Foreign Legion unit in Follow That Camel, Maximillion Burger used to teach fencing at a Viennese finishing school before donning the legion’s uniform. While working in Vienna he met and fell in love with Lady Jane Ponsonby; when their relationship ended he found solace in escaping city life for the openness of the Sahara. Can’t believe his eyes, though, when his old girlfriend turns up in the middle of the desert.

BURKE, GRIPPER

Played by Bernard Bresslaw

A professional wrestler who’s been fighting in America for years before returning home to his previous girlfriend, Esme Crowfoot. Seen in Loving, this man-mountain acts like an animal and isn’t to be messed around with, which Sidney Bliss – who fancied his chances with Esme before Gripper appeared on the scene – finds out. After rekindling their relationship, Gripper and Esme get engaged.

BURKE, JUDGE

Played by Kenneth Williams

An attorney by profession, Judge Burke is also mayor of Stodge City; he has strict views regarding how the place should be run, preventing impropriety by demanding no shooting, fighting, boozing, gambling and ‘no nothing’. His influence vanishes, though, the moment Johnny Finger, alias the Rumpo Kid, rides into town.

The Burke family has been resident in the area ever since his great-grandfather sailed to America on the Mayflower, married into the Wright family and became a ‘Wright Burke’. Seen in Cowboy.

BURKE, SIR EDMUND

Played by Derek Francis

The irascible chairman of the Borough County Hospital’s committee, he presides over Dr Kilmore’s disciplinary hearing in Doctor. He says he’s prepared to listen to Kilmore’s case fairly despite the young doctor having bumped into his Jag, but doesn’t seem to live up to his word when he quickly asks Kilmore if he’s a sex maniac.

BURPA AT DOOR-GRID

Played by Larry Taylor

Seen in Up The Khyber guarding the door at Bunghit Din’s house in Jacksi.

BURPA GUARD

Played by Steven Scott

In Up The Khyber, the Burpa Guard gets knocked out by Lady Joan Ruff-Diamond. Tasked with guarding the jailed British soldiers who tried to recover the embarrassing photo of the Devils in Skirts wearing underpants.

BURPA IN CROWD

Played by Patrick Westwood

Seen in Up The Khyber, the Burpa shouts from a crowd which has gathered to hear the Khasi of Kalabar’s cries of help in his planned uprising against the British. The Burpa isn’t confident that they could topple the Brits.

BURPA ON ROOFTOP

Played by John Hallam

Just as the Burpas prepare to attack the British governor’s residency in Up The Khyber, Bunghit Din and the Khasi of Kalabar hear music drifting through the air. Bunghit asks the Burpa what he can see and reports back that the British have sat for dinner, despite shells and bullets flying around them.

BURT

Played by George Mossman

For Burt in Cowboy, see ‘Stage Coach Driver’.

BURTON, LOUISE

Roles: Private Evans in England and Girl at Zoo in Emmannuelle

Brighton-born Louise Burton began acting professionally at the age of thirteen, working on commercials and a special Jackanory series. After studying at Italia Conti upon leaving school, she appeared on stage and screen, including The Dick Emery Show and Mind Your Language for television.

She quit acting in 1988 when her first child was born, at which point she’d been a regular for seven years on an afternoon show, That’s My Dog.

BURTON, PETER

Role: Hotel Manager in At Your Convenience Peter Burton, born in Bromley, Kent, in 1921, had been working on stage for several years when he entered the film industry in 1950’s prisoner-of-war title, The Wooden Horse. Other early credits include What the Butler Saw, The Tall Headlines, They Who Dare, The Green Scarf, The Long Arm and Sink the Bismarck!.

Burton appeared as Major Boothroyd (the character was later known as Q) in the first Bond movie, Dr No, in 1962, but when he was unavailable for the second film, From Russia With Love, Desmond Llewelyn replaced him. Other big screen credits include A Clockwork Orange, The Bitch, The Jigsaw Man and, his last film, The Doctor and the Devils.

On television he’s appeared in programmes ranging from The Avengers and The Saint to The Professionals and UFO.

BUS CONDUCTOR

Played by Anthony Sagar

The bus conductor is seen in Regardless refusing permission for Francis Courtenay to bring Yoki, a pet monkey he’s been asked to exercise, on the bus.

BUS CONDUCTOR

Played by Kenny Lynch

The Bus Conductor is seen climbing the steps of the double-decker in Loving. He asks for fares from Bertie Muffet and the young lovers who can’t stop kissing each other.

BUSINESS MAN

Played by Michael Nightingale

In Cabby, the Business Man enters the cab drivers’ café and asks if someone will take him to the Station Hotel. He’s more than happy to accept a ride from Anthea, one of the glamour girls from Glamcabs, even though protocol among the taxi-driving fraternity means one of the men, who’d been waiting longer for a customer, should have had the job.

BUSTI

Played by Alexandra Dane

One of the Khasi of Kalabar’s wives seen in Up The Khyber, Busti becomes a volunteer when the Fakir entertains.

BUTCHER, MAJOR

Played by Julian Holloway

Based at the experimental 1313 anti-aircraft battery and seen in England. Ably assisted by his nurse, he examines the long line of slackers who report to sick bay when the new unit commander, Captain Melly, gets tough with the men and women in the battery. His answer to every ailment reported is to dish out a couple of Aspirin and send them on their way.

BUTTERWORTH, PETER

Roles: Doc in Cowboy, Detective Constable Slobotham in Screaming!, Citizen Bidet in Don’t Lose Your Head, Simpson in Follow That Camel, Mr Smith in Doctor, Brother Belcher in Up The Khyber, Josh Fiddler in Camping, Shuffling Patient in Again Doctor, Sinister Client in Loving, Charles, Earl of Bristol in Henry, Pepe in Abroad, Admiral in Girls, Tom in Dick, Henry Barnes in Behind, Major Carstairs in England and Richmond in Emmannuelle

TV: Christmas (69), Christmas (72), What a Carry On!, Christmas (73), The Prisoner of Spenda, The Baron Outlook, The Sobbing Cavalier, The Case of the Screaming Winkles, The Case of the Coughing Parrot, Under the Round Table, Short Knight, Long Daze, And in My Lady’s Chamber and Lamp Posts of the Empire

STAGE: London! and Laughing

Peter Butterworth didn’t join the Carry On outfit until Peter Rogers and Co. headed west in Cowboy, the eleventh in the series, but quickly became one of the mainstays. His characterisations often possessed a diffidence and dithering nature, highlighted by his portrayal of Detective Constable Slobotham in Screaming! Far from assisting his superior, his incompetency simply compounds the lack of progress being made on the case of the missing Doris Mann.

Born in Bramhall, Greater Manchester, in 1919, Butterworth was approaching thirty before he turned to acting professionally. It looked as if a military career beckoned and when war broke out, he joined the Fleet Air Arm, but his flying days were shortlived when his plane was shot down off the Dutch coast in 1941 and he was taken to a POW camp where he spent the remaining war years.

Peter Butterworth appeared in 16 Carry On films

While at the camp he met a fellow prisoner, none other than writer Talbot Rothwell, who would help change his life for ever. They struck up a friendship and Rothwell cajoled Butterworth into taking part in a camp concert, the primary objective being to prevent the German soldiers from hearing the noise of fellow prisoners desperately trying to escape.

When the war ended, Butterworth returned to England and pursued an acting career. Before long he was appearing in summer shows, revues and repertory theatre, before branching out into television, initially in children’s programmes. As his career developed, he started being offered more than just comedy roles in shows such as Emergency – Ward 10, Public Eye and a 1964 episode of Danger Man.

As well as small-screen success, he was kept busy on the stage and from the late 1940s onwards, in films too, including Murder at the Windmill, Night and the City, Blow Your Own Trumpet, Murder She Said, A Home of Your Own and The Day the Earth Caught Fire.

Married to comedienne and impressionist Janet Brown, Butterworth died of a heart attack in 1979, shortly before he was due to appear in a matinee performance of Aladdin at the Coventry Theatre.

MEMORIES

‘The thing about Peter is that he was one of the few people in this theatrical world who never talked about his work; he never spoke about himself outside to other actors. I never saw him studying scripts, including the Carry Ons, but I know he loved the camaraderie on the films.’

JANET BROWN –

Peter Butterworth’s widow

BUXOM LASS

Played by Margaret Nolan

The buxom beauty is chased like an animal across the fields by Henry VIII and his men in Henry. When she hides in a barn, Henry follows and tries forcing himself on her until the girl’s father, who hates royalty, arrives on the scene.

BYRNE, PETER

Role: Bridegroom in Cabby

Born in London in 1928, Peter Byrne left school and worked in a theatrical agent’s office for several months while waiting for a place at the Italia Conti Stage School. He joined the drama school in 1944 but was soon working professionally, beginning with a propaganda documentary for Lewis Gilbert titled Sailors Do Care.

In 1945 he joined the Will Hay act on radio and, later, performed in the Jack Hylton revue, Crying Out Loud, before, in 1946, being called up for National Service. After leaving the army two years later, Byrne worked in various repertory theatres, including Farnham, Margate and Worthing, where he appeared in the stage adaptation of The Blue Lamp. He remained with the show when it moved to Blackpool and the West End.

Later, in 1955, he joined the cast of Dixon of Dock Green as Andy Crawford and stayed twenty years, by which time his character was a detective inspector. Other television credits include The Pattern of Marriage (his small-screen debut), The Jazz Age, Blake’s 7 and, lastly, Derek in the successful sitcom, Bread.

In films he played small parts in first features as well as meatier roles in second features but bowed out of this side of the business to concentrate on television and theatre. He’s appeared in numerous West End roles in such shows as There’s A Girl In My Soup, September Tide and, most recently, The Mousetrap, which he now directs.

MEMORIES

‘I did lots of bits and pieces for Peter Rogers and Gerald Thomas, including brief roles in Watch Your Stern, Raising the Wind and The Iron Maiden. I had a similar small part in Cabby, just a few lines, yet I receive fan mail – can you believe that?

‘I remember I was running from one set to another and got lost while driving over to the location near Pinewood. Eventually I turned up and we got on with the scene. I’d never met the girl [Marion Collins] who played my bride but we were introduced, went into the clinch, said “goodbye” and that was the last I saw of her – that’s showbusiness. It was very pleasant, though.

‘When I was in Raising the Wind, I was in a sequence involving the orchestra. Although it wasn’t a Carry On film there were a lot of the same faces, including Ken Williams and Leslie Phillips, and one of the press officers came in with a group of Japanese journalists. I couldn’t get over it because they treated Ken and Leslie as if they were Robert Redford and Cary Grant! They went absolutely barmy when they saw the pair of them. It was the first indication, in my view, how big they’d become worldwide.’

PETER BYRNE