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For 2

When we lived together at university, Anna and I frequently felt…a little tender. We’d set ourselves up good and proper for a day of vegging. Still in our pyjamas, we would go down to the shop to buy bumper amounts of juice, cheap bread and sweet chilli sauce, to accompany an array of high-school movies and a day’s hilarity. Really, we were making our own fun, because we were just too broke to order a takeaway. This became our substitute for sesame prawn toast and those exciting hot tinfoil boxes of Chinese delights. They really hit the spot in a gross and junky way, which is sometimes exactly what we needed to indulge ourselves.

4 slices of corner-shop bread

3 tablespoons vegetable oil

2 tablespoons sweet chilli sauce

Carefully slice the crusts off the slices of bread. Heat the vegetable oil in a big frying pan on a medium flame. When the oil is rippling, dip a corner of the bread into it to check that it sizzles. Providing it does, add the 4 pieces of trimmed bread and fry until golden and crisp. Turn them over to do the same on the other side. Pour out the sweet chilli sauce into a ramekin and set aside ready for the dipping. When the bread has absorbed the oil and is stiff and golden on both sides, remove from the pan and, on a wooden chopping board, slice each piece into soldiers. Scoop these into the sweet chilli sauce, and munch immediately. There you have our fakery. For best results repeat this dish a few times throughout a long and lazy day.