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8: Inspire Others

You can be a role model and/or a mentor. A role model projects behavior that is emulated by others. This definition does not determine whether the behavior is good or bad. We learn from positive role models how to live. We learn what no to do from negative role models.

How can you be a role model? You have a special talent that is yours to share with others. Project a clear picture of who you are, what is important to you and the direction you are headed. Awaken the expectations of a good life in people around you. Your behavior is an example observed by those around you. As such, you are a walking advertisement of your values, your goals and your life.

“Be such a man and live such a life, that if every man were such as you, and every life a life like yours, this earth would be God’s paradise.”

Philip Brooks, American Episcopal Bishop

There are a number of people who are or have been role models in my life. My parents, Russell and Elizabeth, were the most important. My father modeled the discipline of military duty and pride for his work in the Air Force. He would rise every morning at 5:30 am and prepare for work. He was clean shaven, shoes were always shined, uniform crisply pressed, fed (that was Mother’s doing) and out the door by 6:30 am. My mother was open and loving and modeled how to treat others with respect and how to anticipate and merit respect from others.

I joined the Boy Scouts in sixth grade. I wore my uniform as proudly as my father wore his. My Scout leaders were Ed Badgett, Charles Howell and Charles Dardie. These three men met with us weekly and took us camping once a month. They taught us the ways of scouting and more importantly how to be young men. We did not think of them as role models and mentors but they were.

Society has elevated athletes to celebrity status and role models. The Nike Corporation ran a successful advertising campaign calling on viewers to “Be like Mike”. Mike, of course, is the Hall of Fame basketball player Michael Jordan. Charles Barkley, voted as one of the 50 greatest players in NBA history, on the other hand said,

"Just because I can dunk a basketball doesn't mean I should raise your kids."

What a contrast in looking at the sports hero as a role model. Michael Jordan has accepted his status as a role model. Charles Barkley, on the other hand, does not see himself as a role model. Both, however, project behavior that others copy.

How can you be a mentor? A mentor offers knowledge and expertise (your special talent) on a given topic to someone (mentee) who wants a hands on approach.

There are different types of mentoring – business and social. Business mentoring could put together a senior management executive with a high performing junior executive or a new worker in a department with a veteran employee. Social mentoring one-on-one like Big Brothers Big Sisters demonstrates how adults can help at risk children overcome day to day challenges.

A business or social mentor must do the following in order to establish a mentoring relationship:

Be perceived as being able to help. A mentee must know that what you bring to the table (your special talent) will help them. Essentially, you are letting them know who you are, why you are there, how you can help and to set expectations. Your own self disclosure will help your mentee feel comfortable. You should gather information from your mentee that will help you gain rapport and establish a relationship.

Create a trusting environment that offers and receives open feedback. A trusting environment is a two way street. Mentor and mentee should feel at ease with healthy discussions that further learning.

Challenge and encourage learning that supports lessons learned from missteps. Sometimes great lessons are learned from trial and error. A mentor must allow the mentee to fail but encourage and challenge them to stand up and to start again.

No matter who you are or where you are in life you can inspire others.

“This is the beginning of a new day. You have been given this day to use as you will. You can waste it or use it for good. What you do today is important because you are exchanging a day of your life for it. When tomorrow comes, this day will be gone forever; in its place is something you have left behind... let it be something good.

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