Читать книгу Leashes and Lovers - What Your Dog Can Teach You About Love, Life, and Happiness - Sheryl Matthys - Страница 15

How do our dogs become such an integrated part of our lives? Perhaps it’s because dogs don’t care what color, race, religion, or gender you are. They don’t care if you’re homely or beautiful, wear makeup or not, what brand of clothes you wear, or whether you’re rich, poor, fat, or skinny – for them you’re just you, the most important person in their life. As humans, we are obsessed with beauty, but we are all beautiful, famous, rich, smart – in our dogs’ eyes. Part of the reason your dog has been able to invest wholly in you is trust. He trusts that you’ll do the right thing by him.

Trust is so vital to our human relationships, and yet so rare a factor in most of them. Mistrust is a much more common emotion for us to experience, and yet I can’t imagine a more selfish emotion than mistrust. When we don’t trust someone we love, what we’re really saying is, “Your ability to cause me pain is more fearful to me than your ability to cause me pleasure is hopeful.”

Mistrust is all about us; trust is all about them. And that is where dogs really shine. They are always more than willing to risk, to give, to sacrifice, to become embarrassed, or to try again and make fools of themselves in their almost frenzied pursuit of trust.

Dogs trust us implicitly, and yet how often do we return the favor? A dog would never abuse this trust. That is why we feel so vulnerable, open and, yes, intimate with them. We know they won’t betray us, humiliate us for their own benefit, or mock us.

Why shouldn’t we feel that way with our friends, family, lovers, and spouses? What if we allowed ourselves to be truly trusting of those we care about? What if we could open up to others and feel vulnerable without the selfish fear of embarrassment, humiliation, or betrayal?

Yes, some people will embarrass, humiliate, and betray us. But are these people worth having relationships with in the first place? Why punish those who would never dream of hurting us because we fear a select few who could and would?

When we don’t trust someone we love, what we’re really saying is, “Your ability to cause me pain is more fearful to me than your ability to cause me pleasure is hopeful.”