Читать книгу Mad, Bad and Dangerous - The Book of Drummers' Tales - Spike Webb - Страница 23

Lee Levin is one of the USA’s top session players. He has recorded and toured with numerous artists including Barbra Streisand, Backstreet Boys, Pink, Christina Aguilera, Meat Loaf, the Bee Gees and Ricky Martin. He has also written educational drumming books, videos and CDs including Drum Programming Basics (Ultimate Beginner Tech Start Series) (Alfred Publications).

Lee told me about a dodgy incident while he was on a six-month tour of Latin America with Puerto Rican singer Chayanne.

We’re in a city in the western part of Venezuela called Merida, where they’re known for their fish-flavoured ice cream. Yum.

It’s quite near the beginning of the tour and we’ve made some slight changes to the visual side of things to improve the show. In particular, we’ve created a new ending so that the final encore now involves Chayanne leaving the stage while the band plays on. Then each member of the group takes it in turn to come to the front of the stage, take a bow and exit. The stage is set up with all sorts of ramps and risers, so each member has to run from their usual place to the front, which takes a good five to seven minutes in total. At the end, I’m left by myself to play a drum solo and then stand up, take a bow, and exit.

On this particular night, just before we take the stage, Chayanne’s manager at the time comes up to me and says: ‘As soon as you take your bow, throw your sticks to the audience.’ These managers are never short of bright new ideas.

Luckily, I have an endorsement with Pro-Mark and get my sticks for free, otherwise I might have thought twice about it. After about two hours, the show comes to a close, everyone takes their bows, filing off stage as planned and I’m left doing my solo. I finish, take my bow and then it’s time to throw my sticks into the audience. But there’s a bit of a problem.

My drum riser happens to be 12 feet off the main part of the stage, and flanked by ramps and platforms where Chayanne and various band members and dancers do their thing. This particular venue has a pretty low ceiling so, from my perch, I can almost touch the stage lights. So there’s not much room to toss my sticks. I can’t lift my arms up and toss them way up high into the crowded void ahead, so instead I decide propel the first one straight down towards the front of the stage, like a baseball pitcher, thus avoiding any of the lights just above me.

Bad move.

The stick hurls end over end towards the first few rows as intended. However, it finally connects with a humungous security guard who has been standing there to protect us. My heart sinks as it pelts him right between the eyes.

He doesn’t look at all pleased. I throw the second stick aimlessly up in the air and bolt off stage as fast as I can.

About ten minutes later I’m downing some water and walking back to the dressing room, thinking I’d got away with assaulting a huge tough guy whose job it is to look after the likes of me. Then I hear a door slam at the end of the corridor behind me. I turn and there he is, running towards me. He looks furious and has a large red welt on his brow. And he’s big, very big. What’s more, he’s holding the offending stick, so there’s no doubt as to the purpose of his mission. I’m shaking and thinking to myself, ‘I don’t want to die in Venezuela!’

As he approaches I resign myself to whatever’s coming. Then all of a sudden I am overwhelmed with relief as the guy grabs my hand, shakes it with a big smile, and asks me to sign the stick. Still shaking, I sign the stick and apologise for maiming him. He thanks me and strolls off like a true gentle giant.

Later in the dressing room I realise I’ve learned an important lesson: never throw a sharp object overhand at someone unless you want to hurt them.’

Lee was lucky. These security guards are not particularly well trained in the art of forgiveness, especially not when it comes to cheeky drummers. Lee told me he had tossed many sticks to many audiences after that day, but every single one had left his palm softly and with an exaggerated underhand motion. A lot less dramatic, but a good deal safer.