Читать книгу Desert Rogues Part 2 - Сьюзен Мэллери, Susan Mallery - Страница 18
Chapter Fourteen
ОглавлениеS adik’s mouth was firm and passionate, his lips an inescapable seduction. She supposed that, as pregnant as she was, she shouldn’t want to make love with her husband, but she couldn’t help responding to his desire…or her own. Dr. Johnson had said they could keep being intimate until she told them otherwise.
Sadik breathed her name. His long fingers traced the curves of her face, even as he deepened the kiss. Their tongues stroked and circled. Low in her belly she felt the familiar tension.
The drive back to the palace had never been so long. Despite the raised privacy partition separating them from the driver, she knew that nothing more than kissing would happen until they reached their rooms. Somehow the anticipation made everything even more intense.
Finally they arrived back at the palace. Giggling like teenagers, they raced through the hallways of the palace, heading for their private suite. Sadik opened the door, then quickly drew her inside.
They were pulling clothes off each other, even as they moved toward the bedroom. He touched her everywhere, arousing her to the point of frenzy. When they sprawled onto the bed, they quickly found their way into the side position they’d been using for the past few weeks. It allowed them to face each other while they made love, without having to worry about her growing belly.
Cleo arched in pleasure as he moved into her. His arousal filled her completely. One of his hands stroked her intimately, making it impossible to keep from gasping in delight. They stared at each other. She studied the handsome face that had become so familiar to her.
“We’re having a baby together,” she whispered.
His slow, happy, proud smile touched her heart. “I know,” he told her, speaking softly. “I saw him today. We both saw him.”
Yes, she thought even as passion overwhelmed her. They had both seen the baby, and that connection bound them together for life.
He moved his hand faster and she lost herself in her release. Sadik soon followed, calling out her name and clinging to her. When they were finally able to catch their breath, he stroked her face and traced the outline of her mouth.
“You are my wife,” he said. “I am your husband. And so we will be until we die.”
A simple truth, she thought. Inevitable. Why had she been avoiding the inevitable? Her heart swelled with her feelings until she had no choice but to voice them. She kissed his mouth.
“I love you, Sadik.”
He froze, as if he had suddenly been cast in stone. Then his eyes darkened and he pulled her against him.
“I am glad,” he said. “That is as it should be. You will love me well, and now you will be content to stay.”
He continued to talk, but she couldn’t hear the words. She didn’t think she was even capable of breathing. Had her heart stopped? Had she been cast in stone?
Eventually Sadik rose and dressed. He urged her to rest for the afternoon, and because she couldn’t move or speak, she didn’t argue. Instead she lay under the covers he’d pulled up around her and stared at the ceiling. Eventually something warm and wet trickled down her temple into her hair. She touched the spot, only to find tears.
An awful pain filled her chest. Hopelessness overwhelmed her. In that moment, at the doctor’s office, she had opened her heart to Sadik in a way she’d never opened to anyone before. She’d allowed her love to grow until it overwhelmed common sense. On a rush of feeling, she’d handed over her heart. And he had taken it without offering anything in return.
Cleo knew she’d lived through more disappointments than many people. Her mother’s continual abandonment, both emotional and physical, had left her scarred. Her teenage search for love, when she’d been foolish enough to think that sex was the answer. Her mistake in judgment with Ian. All those events had wounded, bringing her to her knees, but she’d always been able to get up, figure out what she’d done wrong, learn from it and start over. For the first time in her life she felt defeated.
She couldn’t win this battle, because the enemy was a ghost. Sadik would never love her. It didn’t matter how much respect they had between them or how many children bound them together. He would never love her.
Until this moment she’d avoided the truth. Now that she faced it, she wasn’t sure what she was supposed to do.
Three days later Cleo realized that her continued weight gain wasn’t going to be a problem. She didn’t want to eat, she couldn’t sleep and every inch of her body ached as if she’d been dropped from a three-story building.
She forced herself to choke down food because of the baby. For the same reason, she went to bed each night. But while Sadik slept, she stared at the ceiling. As for the pain…she knew it was simply the physical manifestation of her broken spirit. She had played a high-stakes game and she had lost.
In the cool of the morning she walked toward the garden where she was due to meet the king for their time together. She’d dressed in a bright-blue dress and had applied more makeup than usual in an effort to disguise her distress. She even managed to smile at the sight of the king of Bahania being batted at by two calico kittens.
Hassan heard her step and glanced up. He smiled in welcome, then set the kittens on the ground and rose from the bench. His expression changed from pleased to angry in the space of a heartbeat.
“What is wrong?” he demanded by way of greeting.
Apparently she hadn’t done such a great job of concealing her distress. “Nothing. I’m fine. I haven’t been feeling that well in the past couple of days. I think I have a touch of the flu.”
Hassan cupped her face in his hand and stared into her eyes. “Child, you are a constant delight to me. However, you are not an accomplished liar. What I see in your eyes has nothing to do with the flu. Tell me what troubles you.”
His concern was more than she could resist. Unwelcome tears filled her eyes. She closed her eyes and spoke the truth.
“I’m dying inside,” she whispered. “Please, Your Highness, don’t make me stay here.”
The king led her to the bench. After she was seated, he handed her one of the kittens. Cleo stroked the soft fur and felt sharp claws dig into her hand. The small body was warm. When the kitten nestled onto her palm and leaned against her chest, a low rumbling purr burst forth. The sound was far too big for the baby creature’s size. Through her tears she smiled.
“She’s very beautiful,” she said as she stroked the kitten’s head.
“She has much spirit, that one.” Hassan sat next to her and picked up the other kitten. “Her mother isn’t purebred like most of my cats. She is not a particularly good hunter, but there is something about her heart. She loves with all her being.” He shifted the kitten in his arms so he could stroke its belly. The kitten collapsed with delight.
“This will be her last litter,” he said. “Each time her kittens grow and we give them away, she suffers greatly. For weeks she is sad. Sometimes she will not eat and I must feed her by hand.” He shrugged. “No one has told her that I am the king.”
“It sounds like she wouldn’t care.”
He chuckled. “Probably not. After all, that makes her a royal cat.” His humor faded. “As much as I love her kittens, for they carry a piece of her with them, I cannot bear to put her through the pain of having her litters leave her again. Her unhappiness wounds me.”
He looked at Cleo. “She is just a cat. You are the daughter of my heart. Every day you are gone, I will bleed a little inside. I will think of you often. In time we will need to come to some arrangement with regard to my grandson. But for now you are free to go.”
She hadn’t had a clue where he’d been going with the cat story. Now that he’d given her permission to flee Bahania, the band tightening around her chest loosened a little and she was able to draw in air. Time away from Sadik would allow her to recover…or at least start the healing process. She had a bad feeling that he was going to be the only man she ever really loved.
But she would deal with that reality another time. For now it was enough that she could retreat and lick her wounds in private.
“Thank you, Your Highness. I know this isn’t what you want. It’s not what I want either, but—”
Hassan held up a hand to silence her. “I’m giving you time, Cleo, not a permanent pardon. You and Sadik will have to deal with each other eventually. But for now a separation may be the best thing. We have a villa in Florida. As we approach the beginning of winter, that will be a safe place for you. I will arrange for a doctor to be on call for you there. The plane will be ready for the journey at three this afternoon. Does that suit you?”
Actually it overwhelmed her. She put the drowsy kitten on the bench, then flung herself at the king. He held his kitten in one arm as he hugged her with the other.
“I am sorry to see you go,” he told her. “You have been a wonderful daughter. I am very proud of you, Cleo. Never forget that. As for Sadik, I am sad to say, my son is a camel’s ass.”
Sadik paused in the act of typing in a transfer order. The cursor blinked at the tail end of a multimillion-dollar entry. His fingers hovered over the keys, but something had distracted him.
He raised his head, wondering if he had heard an unfamiliar sound. No. It wasn’t that. He tried to shake off the feeling of something being wrong and return to his work, but he could not. He finished typing the number, hit Enter, then saved his work and exited the computer program.
After rising, he crossed to the window and stared out. No unexpected storm darkened the horizon, yet he couldn’t shake the feel of tension in the air. Something was different…and very wrong.
Cleo.
He left immediately for the private wing of the palace, but even before he entered their suite, he knew she was gone. Even so, he crossed the living room and headed for the bedroom. Most of her clothes hung in the closet, but a few casual pieces were gone, as were her cosmetics. He checked the nightstand by the bed and saw that her vitamins were missing, as well.
Cursing under his breath, he hurried toward his father’s office. Was it too late? No, he told himself. Wherever she had gone, he would find her. He had to find her. The pace of his heart picked up the rhythm of the words—he had to find her.
He entered the king’s office without knocking. One of the guards took a step forward, and a secretary rose to his feet, but Sadik ignored both of them. He headed directly for the double doors and entered without knocking.
King Hassan sat behind his desk. He didn’t seem surprised to see his son, and waved off both the guard and the secretary before motioning for Sadik to take a seat.
Sadik dismissed the invitation with a shake of his head. He approached the desk and placed both hands on the broad surface.
“You told her she could leave.”
He spoke the statement rather than ask the question. His father met his angry gaze with a steady look.
“Yes, I did.”
Sadik curled one hand into a fist and pounded it on the desk. “You had no right. She is my wife.”
Hassan rose and glared. “Her heart is broken. I would not watch her fade away from unhappiness. You did not recognize the treasure you possessed, so now you have lost her.”
No! It could not be so. Sadik sucked in a breath, but the act took great effort. Perhaps because there was suddenly a gaping hole in his chest.
“She was content. She loves me. She told me herself.”
Just three days before. He remembered the moment with perfect clarity. For the first time since he had found out about the baby, he had been sure that Cleo was not going to bolt. In the act of confessing her love, she had freed him to relax. If she loved him, she would stay. They would always be together. Women who loved were happy. It had always been so.
“Apparently loving you is not enough,” Hassan said angrily. “She expected more, as did I.”
Sadik frowned. “What more would you expect? I have been a faithful and caring husband. She wants for nothing. I attend to her every morning, I have learned all I can about her pregnancy and the upcoming birth.”
His father slowly shook his head. “You have not learned the most important lesson. I thought you would. I knew what you went through after Kamra’s death, and I know what you vowed. But you are wrong, Sadik. You have always been wrong. Not loving someone does not keep you safe—it merely keeps you alone.”
He resumed his seat. “I will do nothing to help you. Cleo is leaving. After the birth of my grandson, we will fly to see her and the baby. Only then will we discuss what is to happen.” His father’s gaze narrowed. “My intent is not to keep you from your son. However, Cleo needs time. I forbid you to follow her.”
Sadik left without responding. His own father had turned against him. And Cleo had run from him. He took a step, then another, only to stop when he felt a sharp, angry pain in his chest. He could not breathe, could not think, he could only endure the hollow emptiness filling him.
The sensation was faintly familiar. He searched his memory and recalled that he had felt it when he had lost Kamra. But that pain had been a pinprick compared with the open wound he experienced at the loss of Cleo. It was as if he’d been ripped in two. How could there be a world without her? How could he survive? She was both sunlight and moonlight in his ever-dark sky. She had accused him of only caring about the baby, but she had been wrong. The child was an unexpected gift—she was his everything.
He forced himself to keep walking. Memories flashed through his brain, each more accusing than the last. How he had taken her affection and her love for granted. How he had never told her what she desperately needed to hear. He’d been so sure he could avoid pain by not admitting his feelings, but the words did nothing to change how he felt inside.
“Cleo.”
He breathed her name. The act of speaking it aloud gave him strength. He knew what he had to do.
He ran through the corridors of the palace. The shortest path to the garage led through the public areas, and he raced through a tour in progress. He heard the surprised tour guide identifying him to the tourists, and the whirring clicks of dozens of cameras snapping his picture.
Once in the rear of the palace, he hurried into the garage and got behind the wheel of his fastest car. There was not much time. Cleo would be leaving on the family jet, so he couldn’t count on an airline delay to keep her in Bahania.
He raced down the circular drive that led into the city. A flash in his rearview mirror caught his attention. Guards in pursuit!
He ignored them and put his foot on the gas. Fifteen minutes later he entered the highway that would take him to the airport.
Hurry. Hurry. Hurry.
The words beat inside his brain, over and over. He tapped his fingers against his steering wheel and willed his car to go faster. In the distance he heard the sirens of the guards after him, but he ignored them. Nothing mattered but finding Cleo.
After five minutes he decided he had better call ahead and see if he could delay her plane. Several frustrating minutes later, he was no closer to getting in touch with the tower than he had been before he had started. His father sought to block his attempts to bring Cleo home. He would have to—
Sadik slammed on the brakes. Tires screamed in protest, the car shimmied, then bounced as he drove it onto the shoulder. His chest squeezed so tight, he couldn’t breathe.
A black car—like the ones used by members of the royal family—lay on its side in a ditch off the highway. Several rescue vehicles crowded around the damaged automobile. It was as if time had bent and circled around itself to bring him back to a moment he had already endured. He had found Kamra in just this way.
Dead on the side of the road.
He brought his car to a stop. Had he been able to speak, he would have screamed out his protest. Indescribable agony tore through him. He wanted to demand justice. He could not live without Cleo. Didn’t anyone understand? How could she be gone?
He did not know how long he sat there. It felt like lifetimes had passed, but perhaps it was only a few minutes before a police officer knocked on the window of his car.
“Prince Sadik? Is there a problem?”
Sadik lowered his window and slowly shook his head. “The accident,” he rasped in a voice that sounded a thousand years old. “The passenger.”
The officer consulted his notebook. “Someone from one of the embassies. He was drunk, of course. Fortunately he only hurt his car and his pride.”
Sadik stared at the man, unable to absorb the words. “He? Not a woman?”
“Just one person in the vehicle, sir.”
Sadik tried to thank him, but he didn’t know what he said. All he knew was that Cleo was not dead. He still had a chance. If he was too late at the airport, he would travel the earth until he found her. He would bring her home—whatever it took to convince her.
He pulled out onto the road. The guards from the palace were much closer now. He could see their cars in his rearview mirror. The police officer jumped back as Sadik sped down the highway, sending gravel flying.
In a matter of minutes the airport was in sight. He circled the main terminals, heading for the private hangar that housed the royal fleet. Up ahead he could see one of the cars from the palace pulling to a stop in front of the small terminal. Behind, the guards gained ground. It would be close.
He floored the accelerator, racing to the terminal. Up ahead Cleo stepped out of the car, then turned toward the noise. Sadik raced as close as he dared, then slammed on the brakes, turned off the engine and sprang from the vehicle.
“Cleo, you must wait,” he yelled as he ran toward her. Behind him a dozen or so guards gave chase.
He was close enough to see the pain on her face and the confusion as she registered that he was being pursued by palace guards.
Cleo stared at the spectacle of her very proper, very princely husband flying toward her as if the hounds of hell were at his heels. Obviously, he’d figured out she was leaving and expected to stop her. She didn’t know what he wanted, but she knew she was too heartbroken to listen to any logical argument about how they had to stay together for the sake of their child.
“Cleo, please.”
She turned her back on him and headed for the terminal. If she hadn’t stopped by her doctor’s office to make sure it was all right for her to fly, she would have been gone by now. His last-minute theatrics wouldn’t have mattered.
The sound of a rifle cocking caught her attention. Cleo froze, then shifted so she could see Sadik. She nearly stumbled in amazement.
Prince Sadik of Bahania, the king’s second oldest son, stood in the grasp of several armed guards. He put up a good struggle and a fourth man joined the fray in an effort to keep Sadik in place. A fifth man aimed a rifle at the prince.
“We have our orders, Your Highness,” the armed guard said. “You are not to interfere with Princess Cleo in any way.”
Cleo blinked. This couldn’t really be happening. Not to her. Since arriving in Bahania, she’d seen some crazy things, but this was…insane.
Obviously, she wasn’t going to have the clean getaway she’d wanted. Sadik was here and determined. She would have to deal with him.
She dropped her carry-on bag to the ground, then walked toward her husband. The fact that it took four guards to hold him still was fairly impressive, not that she would tell him so. She looked at his handsome face, at the mouth that had kissed hers so tenderly. In that moment she wished with all her heart that things could have been different between them. She would have changed the rotation of the earth for him…if only he had loved her back.
“I’m not going away forever, Sadik,” she said softly, trying to ignore the guards standing so close. “I need time to think and to make peace with my life. I know that we’re going to have a child together. You and I will have to come to terms with that and with how we’re going to raise our child. The king has given me a reprieve, not permission to disappear.”
He stared at her with an expression she’d never seen before. The intensity of his gaze made her uncomfortable, as did the guards. She turned to the one with the rifle.
“Any chance you’d let him go?”
The guard stunned her by nodding and stepping back. Instantly Sadik was free. Cleo blinked.
“I did that?” she asked.
Sadik stepped away from the guards and straightened his suit jacket. “Apparently my father gave them orders to follow your instructions. I am grateful you did not ask to have me shot.” He took her hand in his and led her toward the terminal. “If you will permit me a few minutes of your time before you leave?”
She was still too amazed by what had happened with the guards to protest. It was only when she found herself in a small, private room that she realized Sadik was going to try to convince her to stay. She sighed. When would he figure out that all the sensible words in the world weren’t going to work on her? When would he see that—
“You are alive,” he breathed, pulling her close. “I thought I had lost you, both when you left and then again when I saw that car on the side of the road. I could not have lived without you.”
He wasn’t making any sense. She wiggled to get free of his embrace. “Sadik, what are you talking about?”
He cupped her face and rained kisses on her skin. Once his lips brushed hers, it was darned hard to maintain emotional distance. She forced herself to push him away.
“I’m not falling for that again,” she told him, taking a step back.
“You do not understand.” He grabbed her upper arms. “I thought you were dead. I thought it had happened to me again. Only this time the horror was greater, so much greater because once you were gone, I knew that I would have lost the most precious part of myself.”
She resisted the urge to shake her head. “You’re not making any sense. Gone where? On the plane?”
He kissed her. She tried to stop him and then, well, she stopped trying. Because as much as she knew she had to leave Sadik, she didn’t want to go.
“I have hidden the truth,” he murmured against her mouth. “I thought if I did not confess it, even to myself, that it could never hurt me. I refused to say how I felt about you. And by not acknowledging my feelings, I planned to keep you at arm’s length.”
His dark eyes brightened with emotion. “Losing Kamra pained me. The discomfort was an inconvenience. Losing you would destroy me, Cleo. You are my world. So I pretended not to care. Because if I did not care and you went away, I should not mind.”
She swallowed hard. “Sadik?”
He stroked her hair away from her face. “I love you, Cleo. I cannot exist without you. This isn’t about our child—it is about you. Only you. From the beginning you have entranced me. Those first few passionate days together changed me forever. But I was determined to resist. I would not be ruled by a mere woman.”
She heard the words and desperately wanted to believe them. Mostly because she didn’t have a choice. “So that’s why you didn’t call or try to get in touch with me when I went back to Spokane? Because I was a mere woman.”
He smiled slightly. “I had something to prove to myself.”
“And did you?”
“No. Spending all my time trying not to think of you is exactly the same as thinking of you all the time. I knew you would return for the wedding, so I vowed to wait. I was also determined to have you.” He kissed her palms. “In my bed and in my life.”
She leaned against him and let his healing words wash over her. “Can you really let Kamra go?”
He sighed. “She has been gone a long time. I used her as a talisman to hold you at bay. The truth, my love, is that she was an arranged match. We came to some agreement between us. There was mild affection, but to compare my feelings for her with my feelings for you is to compare a glass of water with the ocean. I love you.”
She flung her arms around him, burrowing close. It was something of a trick, what with her stomach in the way.
“Please stay,” he begged.
She closed her eyes, as much to hold in the joy of the moment as to try to compose herself.
“I will love you forever,” he promised. “I will prove myself to you every day. I swear on my honor, you are the most important person in the world to me. You belong here, with me. Please, Cleo.”
She could not stand to see her handsome prince brought to his knees. She kissed his mouth.
“I will stay,” she told him, her heart filled with happiness. “And I will love you…one year for each grain of sand in the Bahanian desert.”