Читать книгу Toilet Training - Vicki Lansky - Страница 5

Introduction

Why Is Toilet Training Such a Big Deal?

A number of things can contribute to a parent’s strong need to get a child toilet trained, right now. Some are pressures from your peers, fear that you’re failing as a parent by tolerating a child in diapers, the enrollment of your child in preschool, and, not least, the strains and stresses of what’s known as “diaper drag.”

First, assume that any neighbor or relative who claims victory in toilet training her child before yours is lying (well, maybe exaggerating), fantasizing, or redefining the term. I never considered my children really trained until they could get in and out of the bathroom, get their clothes off and back on, clean their bottoms properly, and wash their hands—all without any help from me. But for now, we’ll work with that more limited but still important definition that simply has the child saying, “Get me to the potty” in time.

Second, plan not to take it personally. Your child’s readiness for toilet training is no indication of his or her IQ, your level of parenting ability, or your parents’ attempts to raise you properly. (Despite what your mother-in-law might imply about your 3-year-old still being in diapers, doesn’t mean she did a better job than you’re doing.)

Third, be assured that it will happen. When your child is truly ready, physically and emotionally, toilet training will happen rapidly. And be assured that while it’s going on, toilet training is very, very important, but when it’s accomplished, you’ll wonder why it seemed like such a big concern!

Fourth, remember that you are not alone. When your child regresses for the third time, meditate on the fact that, simultaneously, several million other mothers and fathers are earning their toilet-training merit badges, too.

One controversy on this subject is the language used to describe this process. It’s called “toilet learning,” “potty training,” “toilet teaching,” and “toileting.” Yes, learning may be more accurate than training, at least according to today’s wisdom, but I’ve never had anyone ask me if my child was toilet learned. So please bear with my preference for toilet training, and don’t search for deeper meanings.

Remember that there are three things you can never make your child do— eat, sleep, or go to the bathroom.