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One needs to “separate the people from the problem” (Fisher, Ury, and Patton 1991) in a conflict. Even if some conflicts concern mostly the resolution of a problem, nevertheless the human, or intersubjective, component reveals itself as decisive in finding a way out of the problem.

In other cases, the damaged relationship is more important than the problem itself, which is only a symptom. Thus, addressing it constitutes a principal objective of mediation. It is not conceived as a moral question, but as a contextual necessity. Reality puts people or groups in contact, brought to stand alongside one another and to interact not only because they want to, but because they cannot do otherwise, at least in the near future. Here are many examples.

 Ex‐spouses – Two hypotheses can be distinguished. The first one requires a more sustainable relationship.Divorce with childrenParents need to maintain relations, even minimal, to better assume their respective role as parents. Children will be grateful that their mother and father know how to talk to one another and continue to exchange views, without tearing each other apart. All this is in the interest of the children.Divorce without childrenThe ex‐spouses wish to conserve a cordial or at least efficient relationship. Even if they do not see each other again, it is in their interest to maintain a relationship in the strict framework of the divorce procedure, which they hope will be the least painful possible.

 Neighbors – Unless you move to isolated regions, you will inevitably rub shoulders with neighbors, with whom it is preferable to maintain cordial relations so as not to make daily life difficult for yourself.Neighbor on the same floorDespite the racket from their party until five in the morning and the damage they caused to the walls of the corridor two days earlier, my neighbor and I have an interest in speaking civilly to one another in the future in order to manage co‐ownership issues.

 Students, teachers, parents – Our children spend much time at school. It is also the workplace of teachers. From elementary school, to middle and high school, students, teachers, and parents are linked for years. Preserving the quality of these relationships is fundamental for all (Cardinet 1997).Insults at schoolStudent of this professor or professor of this student, I think about tomorrow. I still recall this moment of tension where we lacked respect and nearly got physical. I have a hard time speaking to the other. But, tomorrow, we will meet again in class and it will be unpleasant. I would prefer to not go there, or to call in sick. But seeing one another again is inevitable: still six months before the end of the year. Ah, if only there were mediators! Could they help us?

 Employers and employees – By definition, a corporation supposes continuity; beyond conflicts, everyone needs to work together.Work methods in a companyEmployee of my boss, or boss of my employee, I no longer tolerate this lack of respect for the work methods I propose. They do not understand anything no matter how hard I try to explain it. As for firing or resigning, I do not even consider it. But tomorrow, the atmosphere will remain horrible. Ah, if mediators were able to make them understand the advantages of these new work methods!

 Between organizations – Businesses, governments, and associations maintain ongoing working relationships (clients, users, suppliers, partners, associates) which are not in their interest to cut off.A company and its supplierA company notes the increase in late deliveries, errors related to orders, and changes in taxes without previous information from its main supplier. Things become so bad that the company is nearly thinking of changing suppliers. Terminating relations: why not? But what will be the cost associated with a new supplier? Facilitating an exchange of explanations between the two companies, mediators help to shed light on the temporary difficulties of the supplier – the unexpected departure of the director of production. The supplier agrees to the preferential conditions of its client regarding future deliveries, once the director of production is replaced.

 Between countries – It is advantageous for neighboring states to maintain good relations. If tensions appear, it is in the interest of the international community to mitigate them through mediation efforts.A border disputeA border dispute has poisoned relations between two countries for years. But is it only a border problem? What about these ancient historical tensions that have not been dealt with? Is it not time to evoke endured and inflicted sufferings in order to work toward a reconciliation? From the viewpoint of neighborly relations, beyond fixing the borders once and for all, what about reflecting on exchanges across these borders: developing trade between the two economies, student exchanges, learning both languages, creating sister cities, etc.? A third party can help to support confidence building at least until direct negotiations can take place.

The concern to maintain or rebuild an acceptable – and ideally, satisfying – relationship is at the core of many mediations. Its success is measured by the results of the restored relationship, to the extent that parties themselves judge relevant.