Читать книгу Be Your Own Best Friend - Chessie King - Страница 11

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I’m feeling PROUD

MY DEFINITION: Your inner cheerleader is chanting, ‘Give me an O, give me an H, give me a YAAAAS … Give me an I. Give me a D. I. D. I. T. And what do you have … OH YAAAAS, I DID IT!’


Whatever you did, no matter how big or small that thing was, I am so damn proud of you. We’re going to celebrate this moment because next time you doubt yourself, you can come back to this place and remember how glorious you felt.

We can all be pretty bad at congratulating ourselves, but giving yourself recognition is so important in building our self-esteem and becoming our own best friend.

I feel so much pride for my friends, family, Mat and total strangers – but I have struggled to congratulate myself in the past. I’m easily proud of the little things like putting on a white wash without turning it all pink by sneaking in a red sock. But with the bigger things, the things other people were ‘proud’ of me for, I just couldn’t feel it. But we’re working on it, my best friend and I.

Writing this is genuinely the proudest I have ever felt of myself. Every time I sit down at my laptop to write words, I do a little wiggle. I think it’s a real milestone for me, it’s a proud mum moment, like I’m proud of my brain, proud of my fingers for tap-tap-tapping away.

INDULGE IN THIS PRIDE.

Tell your brain just how phenomenal you are. Not anyone else – you. This is your time to big up yo-self. It’s not just saying, ‘Well done, good job gal,’ once a year – it’s a daily thing, because it all adds up. You have to believe you’re worthy of the congratulations, the celebrations. Be your own supporter, cheerer-on-er and then spread the lalalove:

You have three ‘I’m proud of you’ compliments in your kindness bank; they’re to give away today, tomorrow and the next day …

1. For you

WHAT ARE YOU PROUD OF TODAY?

Write it down – you can read this whenever you’re stuck in a patch of self-doubt. Revisit it, relive it.

HEY ME. REMEMBER THAT TIME YOU …

did your first talk at a school and spoke to 150 girls about body confidence, mental-health awareness and social media?

YOU ORIGINALLY THOUGHT THAT …

you wouldn’t be able to do it, so you were going to say no when you were asked to speak for an hour on your own.

BUT YOU DID IT AND YOU FELT …

so appreciated and you still buzz off the energy in that room now. You woke up the next morning so proud of yourself, you were paid in hugs, lovely feedback and teachers who said how interesting they found the talk.

SEE, YOU CAN DO IT.

2. For a stranger

I see you – you’re feeling yourself, let’s use that rocket fuel to make someone else feel proud of themselves too. Let’s show everyone else some love and feed them some of your energy. You’ve noticed the new assistant in the office is feeling a little anxious as it’s her first day – give her that extra boost and recognition she deserves by commenting how well she did when you’re leaving the office. Build each other up, see people, hear people, root for each other. A fire doesn’t lose anything when lighting another fire.

3. For a family member/friend/partner/colleague

With all compliments, they should come from a place of truth, and not just be forced, because that won’t help anyone.

See how it goes down … how do they take it? If they deflect it, say it again in a different way … I find rephrasing it works – mean it and repeat it:


It’s never too late for you to start being proud of yourself – it doesn’t mean you’re ‘cocky’ or ‘arrogant’. Come back to this joyful feeling when your inner cheerleader has gone quiet on you.


Be Your Own Best Friend

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