Читать книгу Трое в лодке, не считая собаки / Three Men in a Boat (To Say Nothing of the Dog) - Джером Клапка Джером, Джером Джером - Страница 6

It was Mrs. Poppets that woke me up next morning.

She said:

“Do you know that it’s nearly nine o’clock, sir?”

“Nine o’ what?” I cried.

“Nine o’clock,” she replied, through the keyhole.

I woke Harris, and told him. He said:

“I thought you wanted to get up at six?”

“So I did,” I answered; “why didn’t you wake me?”

“How could I wake you, when you didn’t wake me?” he retorted.

I saw George. He was still sleeping – the man who had wanted to know what time he should wake us – on his back, with his mouth wide open. I shouted in his ear, and he awoke.

“What’s the matter?” he asked, sitting up.

“Get up!” roared Harris. “It’s quarter to ten.”

“What!” he shrieked, jumping out of bed into the bath.

We finished dressing, and we remembered that we had packed the tooth-brushes and the brush and comb, and we had to go downstairs, and take them out of the bag.

We went downstairs to breakfast. Montmorency had invited two other dogs to come and see him off,[39] and they were sitting on the doorstep.

It was very bright and sunny on that morning. Harris and I brought our luggage to the doorstep, and began to wait for a cab.

Our luggage was rather big. There was a huge suitcase and the small hand-bag, and the two hampers, and a large roll of rugs, and some four or five overcoats and mackintoshes, and a few umbrellas, and then there was a melon in a bag, and a couple of pounds of grapes in another bag, and a Japanese paper umbrella, and a frying-pan.

Quite a small crowd had collected, and people were asking each other what was the matter. One party (the young and giddy portion of the crowd) thought that it was a wedding, and pointed out Harris as the bridegroom; while the elder and more thoughtful party said that it was a funeral, and that I was probably the corpse’s brother.

At last, an empty cab came, and packing ourselves and our things into it, we drove away amidst the cheers of the crowd.

We got to Waterloo[40] at eleven, and asked where the eleven-five started from.[41] Of course nobody knew; nobody at Waterloo ever knows where a train is going to start from, or where a train when it starts is going to, or anything about it. The porter who took our things thought it would go from number two platform, while another porter, with whom he discussed the question, had heard a rumour that it would go from number one.

We went upstairs, and asked the traffic superintendent, and he told us that he had just met a man, who said he had seen it at number three platform. We went to number three platform. We saw the engine-driver, and asked him if he was going to Kingston. He said he couldn’t say for certain of course, but that he rather thought he was. We gave him half-a-crown, and begged him to be the 11.5 for Kingston.

“Nobody will ever know,” we said, “what you are, or where you’re going. You know the way, so go to Kingston.”

“Well, I don’t know, gentlemen,” replied the noble fellow, “but I’ll do it. Give me the halfcrown.”

Thus we got to Kingston.

We learnt, afterwards, that they had spent hours at Waterloo, looking for the train we had come by, and nobody knew what had become of it.

Our boat was waiting for us at Kingston just below bridge. We stored our luggage, and into it we stepped.