Читать книгу How to Make Anyone Fall in Love With You: 85 Proven Techniques for Success - Leil Lowndes, Leil Lowndes - Страница 24

Let’s look at the studies and see what works. A researcher named Monica Moore heard that women made two-thirds of the approaches and wanted to find out exactly how they did so. She set up a study where she observed more than 200 women at a party and recorded what are scientifically known as their non-verbal solicitation signals.

Here, in descending order, are the results of Monica Moore’s findings. The number following each move is the number of times Moore saw it work successfully during the experiment.²⁰ Need I spell it out? Huntresses, these are the moves that make a man come over and talk to you at a party.

How Women Successfully Make the First Move
Smile at him broadly	511
Throw him a short, darting glance	253
Dance alone to the music	253
Look straight at him and flip your hair	139
Keep a fixed gaze on him	117
Look at him, toss your head, then look back	102
‘Accidentally’ brush up against him	96
Nod your head at him	66
Point to a chair and invite him to sit	62
Tilt your head and touch your exposed neck	58
Lick your lips during eye contact	48
Primp while keeping eye contact with him	46
Parade close to him with exaggerated hip movement	41
Ask for his help with something	34
Tap something to get his attention	8
Pat his buttocks (My note: not advised!)	8

Sisters, do not be hesitant about making the first move. If you need more courage, think of it this way. Female choice is an evolutionary mandate given to a woman so she may select the best mate and thus assure the survival of the species. You are merely fulfilling your instinctive destiny when you overtly lure Mr Handsome Stranger. Mother Nature would approve.

Still shy? Do you feel he will think you are too forward if you smile broadly at him in the crowd or ‘accidentally’ brush up against him? He won’t, because, happily, the male ego takes over … retroactively. Ten minutes later he won’t even realize that he was not the one who made the initial overture. Researcher Moore said that men think they are making the first move when they are actually responding to women’s non-verbal overtures.

I decided to add my own research to Monica Moore’s established findings when I was dining alone recently at one of the ubiquitous TGIF restaurants in Albany, New York. I was giving a talk the following morning to a singles’ group, so as I was finishing dinner I was running the next day’s seminar programme over in my mind. In my talk I planned a segment on the ‘smile’, in which I would tell women how important it is to smile at an attractive man.

I thought to myself, ‘Leil, you hypocrite. Tomorrow morning you’ll be telling women to have the courage to smile at strangers, and you don’t even have the nerve to do it yourself.’ While ruminating over this, I spotted a good-looking man reading while finishing his dinner a few tables from me. I thought, ‘OK, Leil, courage. Let’s try it.’ So I smiled at this handsome stranger.

The poor chap looked a little stunned and dove his astonished nose back into his book. Soon after, he looked up again. I smiled again. Once more his nose disappeared in his reading material. A few minutes later the handsome stranger got up and walked past my table to go to the men’s room. As he passed, I forced myself to smile yet again. The perplexed fellow kept on walking, scratching his head.

Then things got interesting. On the way back from the men’s room he walked very slowly by my table. Once more I looked up at him and – you guessed it – smiled. Mr Handsome Stranger stopped walking. After the flood of smiles I had drowned him in, it was perfectly logical to start chatting as if we had been formally introduced. He joined me at my table for coffee.

Well, I invited this gentleman – his name was Sam – to attend my seminar the next morning, which he did. To illustrate the ‘smile’ part of my seminar, I told the audience the story (without revealing Sam’s identity, of course) of how my smile had engineered a meeting with the lone diner.

After the seminar, Sam said, ‘You know, Leil, I suppose you were talking about me in that little story you told. But,’ he added, looking thoroughly confused and quite sincere, ‘I thought it was I who made the approach to you.’ Of course, Sam.

I tell you, Sisters, the male ego is a wondrous thing. Have the courage to smile broadly, nod, point to a chair and invite him to sit – or choose almost any of Monica Moore’s manoeuvres – and he will forget that he didn’t make the first approach.

TECHNIQUE 8 (FOR HUNTRESSES)

Move First

Huntresses, when you spot a possible Quarry, do not wait for his approach. Nature decrees that you must make the first move. Use any of the proven ploys. It is as close to jabbing his buttocks with a syringe filled with PEA as you can get.