Читать книгу The Wife Led Marriage - London Storm - Страница 4

Where is this desire for a wife led marriage coming from? It is worth the exploration. Let’s take the wife led marriage and drop it down to the base level which is a female led relationship. A female led relationship is a relationship in which the female has the authority and leads the relationship. This is also called FLR for short. FLR is becoming a trend that more couples are trying out. The trick with this work is that is intermixed with culture and sex. Yes, sex! We are talking about dominant and submissive sides to the equation. FLR covers a wide spectrum. On one side, the male is empowering the woman and serving her lovingly, hence called a loving FLR, and the other side is where the woman completely controls the man and all aspects of his life, known as Femdom. And then we have everything in between.

This book, is based on the light side of the spectrum, empowering your wife and serving her in a loving, supporting way. Think of a knight serving his queen on this side while the other side is a slave serving a master. Whatever you want from this is up to you. Be free, explore, however, use caution and sound judgement as always.

This book is in reference to married couples learning how to empower each other. It is a two-way street of empowerment. The husband empowers the wife to lead and the wife empowers the husband to serve. The “how” they do it is up to them. As a married couple, I refer to a man and woman who are in a faithful loving relationship. That does not mean to exclude single sex marriages. For this book, the discussion will talk about the male/female dynamic and how it plays out in a marriage. For anyone in a single sex marriage, take what you can from this book and have fun with it. Empowerment is a good thing. And the leader/supporter roles will become clear in whatever dynamics you have in a single sex marriage.

Let’s define Empower. It means: to give power or authority to; authorize; to promote the self-actualization or influence of. In a wife led marriage, the husband is submitting and surrendering to his wife's authority in the marriage.

This may be a quantum leap for some couples. As men, we are programmed to appear powerful, and as women they may feel programmed to be subservient. A lot is going on in the background of our minds. Can you see how this can be a lot to comprehend and execute? By programmed, I mean, we have beliefs formed about how a man or women should behave and what roles they should have.

What are the benefits of doing this? Couples in wife led marriages report they are happier. The sex is better. Communication is better. The sense of connection is greater. Can we get a little deeper? Of course, for men, a deep desire to serve exists in many of us. Wife led marriage’s tap into that desire and provide the man a mission to serve. The dynamic is that the husband empowers the wife to lead and the wife empowers the husband to serve. When this happens both husband and wife can discover a greater happiness together.

Women in a loving wife led marriage often feel more supported and secure. That support translates to a deeper level of trust which leads to a deeper level of intimacy. It may take a while and it ultimately allows the women to be free, and empowered to lead the relationship how she feels.

Speaking for myself, the road to a wife led marriage started with me and my desires. I can say that many of them revolved around the fantasy of being a submissive man to a dominant woman. These fantasies are strong. As I continued to examine and express these fantasies, I came upon the concept of a female led relationship. As I researched this topic, I learned how we are in uncharted territory on this subject. It’s a personal decision and it is based on many factors and you need full agreement to make it happen successfully.

A majority of the FLR material available focuses on female domination and the BDSM lifestyle to some extent. Which makes it some form of chocolate not vanilla in nature, if you know what I mean. And so here lies the rub, you are in a traditional marriage arrangement and now you want to try a wife led marriage. You burn with a desire to let your submissive side out and be of more service to your wife, and yet all the propaganda is domination flavored. This makes it hard to introduce this lifestyle to your partner if they are not already interested in this. This can be real turn off for a lot of women and men. Female domination of a male is not a wife led marriage, it is something different.

For those who do not know, Femdom, is a word used to indicate a woman being superior to a man. A Femdom relationship is where the women is in charge and has a higher status than the man. This is not what I refer to as a wife led marriage. Femdom is different and not something that will be introduced as a part of a loving wife led marriage.

In looking at all what is published on the topics of a female led relationship, it became clear to me that few books existed from the male perspective for the normal guy, and how it can play out in a real marriage. A great book is “Worshipping Your Wife: Six Steps for Turning Marriage Back Into Passionate Courtship” by Mark Remond. The author dives into the world of serving your wife and portrays this in a loving way. It is a worthwhile read and provides a sound framework on the benefits of a wife led marriage. As much as I adore that book, and I do, as it helped me tremendously in getting a picture of the knight serving the queen framework clear, it left out some of the inner mental work that happens along this voyage.

Part of this book is to dive into some of the methodology and take a look at the inner growth needed to make this happen in one’s life. It is a fun and rewarding journey if you can get your head around it in the right space. A lot of growth will happen in your relationship in making this transformation. To define transformation, it is operating from a different place. In a wife led marriage, the husband and wife are transformed and operating from a different place than the traditional marriage roles. It is wonderful, scary, exciting, and full of surprises for both.