Читать книгу Overheard - Mark Love - Страница 29

A man is in an independent retailers stocking up with medicines. He puts his purchases down in front of the checkout assistant.

CHECKOUT: Oh, excuse me a minute, sir, I’ll just need to call the supervisor.

The supervisor, who happens to be in earshot, strolls over and takes a look at the four packs of paracetamol and one pack of aspirin.

SUPERVISOR: That’s okay, Mandy. Sir, I’m afraid we’ll have to process these as single purchases.

MAN: I have to pay for them separately?

SUPERVISOR: Yes, sir. ’Spolicy.

MAN: I don’t understand. You mean you want me to do five separate transactions with my debit card?

SUPERVISOR: Yes, sir. Sorry, sir, ’spolicy.

The people in the queue behind the man begins to mutter darkly.

MAN: But they’re what? Forty pence each?

SUPERVISOR: Nothing I can do, sir. ’Scompany policy.

MAN: O-kay.

The supervisor moves on. The queue mutters ever more darkly behind the man as he falteringly proceeds with his purchases.

MAN: So is this about preventing suicides or something?

CHECKOUT: Dunno. Just can’t do it.

With all purchases made, the man offers a regretful smile to the grumpy elderly gentleman behind him in the queue.

ELDERLY GENTLEMAN: If the buggers want to die, bloody let ’em! That’s what I say!

Muttered agreement along the length of the queue.