Читать книгу Legend of the Peeing briton - Павел Тюрин - Страница 26

The most popular magazines were in a hurry to share the cheery news of a new star being born with their readers. One of them wrote on the cover: ‘Our most dashing thrill!’

The latest information is concerned with the negotiations taking place about an international contest to award a title of ‘Mister Peeing Briton’ that will be held in Riga, in Brussels, and in England.

The organisers didn’t envisage it as your typical Beauty contest. One couldn’t win it only on their good looks. This will be the contest of innovative manliness, the new ways of guest catwalk, tourist demeanour, the most effective ways of demonstrating the exclusive fashion, originality in club dance and so on. The winners will be awarded the miniature statues of gold – the Peeing Briton, silver – the Pee-peeing Briton, and bronze – the Pee-pee-peeing Briton. The winners will also be awarded tours to the Blockhead’s motherland, and establishment of a Peeing Briton sculpture at their registered place of residence. The list of the consolation prizes is no shorter and is just as varied. It includes figures of Blockhead from amber and semi-precious stones from the shores of Loch Ness, luxurious illustrated hard cover editions of the ‘Legends of the Briton’, shorts signed by Blockhead himself, and other things that the organisers prefer to keep silent about for the time being.

Several of the world-famous fashion houses have now declared their willingness to participate in the contest. The well-known couturiers have harnessed the main elements of the style that associates with the dishevelled look of the ‘Peeing Briton.’ The new style has already been described as a ‘Peeing Fashion’.

One of the first famous people who announced that he has started work on the new haute couture collection was the maestro Jean Paul Gaultier. He almost channels the free spirit of Blockhead – as he shows up during his collection’s presentation – that he is practically indistinguishable from the original.