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Loss, Love and Growth

REV. ALISON HUTCHISON

This was used in small church-group and hospital settings. It allows the acknowledging and addressing of the pain of various kinds of loss and the hope of growth through them, with God’s help.

Loss

Leader

It has been said that life begins in loss – in the very act of birth, we lose the comfort and security of our mother’s womb and are forced out to face a strange and unfamiliar world. The act of birth is inseparable from the pain of letting go. That experience of loss and new birth continues life-long.

When we think of loss, we tend to think of the aching grief of losing a loved one in death. However, loss plays a larger part in our lives. We leave places and people, and are left by them. We may lose opportunities or our dreams, our hopes. There are times we lose our identities, or the person we long to be. We may lose our health suddenly or slowly as we age. We may know the loss and grief of being separated from each other by distance or disagreement.

Let us acknowledge our losses and the grief they bring . . .

Reflective prayer

To be spoken by one or more people. Explain that silence will be used.

Voice 1

Living, loving God, we bring to you now any loss, any grief, large or small, deserved or undeserved, expected or unexpected. (pause)

Voice 2

We have lost those we loved, Lord – death, disagreement or distance separate us. Our lives have changed, for they are no longer with us. We are grateful for the loves shared, yet deeply mourn their absence. In the midst of our grief, past and present, you know and understand the confusion of our many different thoughts and feelings. We lift those thoughts and feelings to you now. (Silence – at least ten seconds)

Voice 3

We may lose our health, Lord. We feel cheated as body and mind fail us. We may face restricted lives, and the shackles of our times of ill-health are irksome and heavy. We lift our thoughts and feelings to you now. (Silence – at least ten seconds)

Voice 4

We may have lost ourselves, Lord, the people we long to be. We are unsure of who we are, how we should live, and have lost our way. We lift our thoughts and feelings to you now. (Silence – at least ten seconds)

Leader

Suffering Lord, share our pain and give us courage. Healing God, take our grief and ease its ache. May your great love, and the love of those around us, be the balm for grief past, the strength for living today and the hope for our future. Amen.

Love

Leader

Whatever we suffer in life, let us remember the love which never leaves us.

Reader

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? No, in all things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:35, 37–9, NIV)

Growth

Leader

Only crushed wheat can be made into bread. Only trampled grapes can be made into wine. Loss may crush our lives and grief may trample our spirits, but love and courage can transform them.

We have the choice. We can remain in our hurt, or with divine and human help we can accept, adapt and grow. Even in the most devastating loss we can find the opportunity to create something new, so that the loss need not be futile. As the act of birth is inseparable from the pain of letting go, we can find new birth and growth.