Читать книгу 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do - Amy Morin, Amy Morin - Страница 20

Lauren was clear that she really wanted to be a nice person, and she thought that being a good wife meant tolerating her mother-in-law at all costs. She felt it would be disrespectful to ask her mother-in-law not to come over and she was hesitant to speak up when her feelings were hurt. She’d been raised to “turn the other cheek” when someone treated her poorly. But with help, she was able to see that setting healthy boundaries wasn’t being mean or disrespectful. Instead, setting limits on what was allowed in her own home was healthy for her family and less taxing on her mental strength.

Anytime you don’t set healthy emotional and physical boundaries for yourself, you risk giving away your power to other people. Perhaps you don’t dare say no when your neighbor asks for a favor. Or maybe you dread receiving a phone call from a friend who constantly complains, but you continue to pick up on the first ring. Each time you avoid saying no to something you really don’t want, you give away your power. If you don’t make any attempt to get your needs met, you’ll give people permission to take things away from you.

A lack of emotional boundaries can be equally problematic. If you don’t like the way someone treats you, yet you don’t stand up for yourself, you give that person power over your life.