Читать книгу DBT For Dummies - Gillian Galen - Страница 50

As we discuss earlier in this chapter, sometimes the hardest thing to do is to not move into action to make a decision, to continue a conversation or debate, to get in the last word, to quit a job or school, or even to end a relationship. Due to the very direct nature of communication in DBT, clients sometimes have difficulty seeing their therapist’s perspective. It may be that the therapist is holding a firm contingency that was part of a behavior plan or is giving you difficult feedback. When this happens, sometimes it can be hard to see your therapist’s point of view.

When you’re struggling to see your therapist’s point of view, it’s helpful to ask yourself whether you’re confused or you’re noticing strong feelings about what they have said or done. Keep in mind that interpersonal challenges are best addressed when both people are regulated. The stronger your emotions are, the more difficult it is to see other points of view. Here are some ways to remain effective and see your therapist’s points of view:

 Take a few deep breaths, and make sure your breathing and heart rate are regulated.

 Note that your therapist is trying to help you reach your goals; ask yourself how your therapist’s perspective may be helping you achieve those goals.

 Ask yourself: What is the wisdom in your therapist’s position?

 Ask yourself: Do you want to be right or effective in this interaction?