Читать книгу and I Believe - Jodie Richard-Bohman - Страница 14

“Something happened between you and Dad, didn’t it?” Jenna asked when I picked her and Mia up from Kellie’s.

I glanced in the back seat at Mia, whose eyes were already shut. Afraid I would start crying if I spoke, I just shook my head “yes” to Jenna.

“Are you two getting a divorce?”

Her question took me completely off guard. With tears filling my eyes, I shrugged my shoulders, not knowing the answer to that myself. She started crying then. Seeing her like that, hurt me so much, and I quickly embraced her.

“Is it something I did?” she asked, her lip quivering.

“Oh, no, Jenna, no, no,” I repeated. “This has nothing to do with anybody but your dad and me.”

She didn’t seem convinced and was quiet the entire way home, but when we pulled into the third bay of Mom and Dad’s garage, her eyes lit up a bit. All of the grandkids loved having sleepovers up here with Mom and Dad, so I prayed that this would help her and Mia with the transition.

“We’re just going to stay up here temporarily, okay?” I asked once we were inside.

“That’s fine. I don’t mind.”

“And you and Mia will both have your own rooms, and I’ll sleep on the couch.”

“Really?”

“Have you slept on this couch? It’s really, really comfortable,” I joked.

Plopping down on it, she spread her arms back behind her head.

“You’re right. This is nice and comfy.”

“Are you offering to sleep on it?” I asked.

“Ah, no,” she answered with a smile.

“I brought some of your things over from the house. Why don’t you arrange things the way you want them.”

“Okay.”

“Where’s Gwandma and Gwandpa?” asked a sleepy Mia, who was standing there innocently holding her little pink bunny.

“Grandma and Grandpa are at their house, but maybe we can see them tomorrow, okay?”

“Otay. Where’s Daddy?” she then asked.

Oh great—here we go.

“Um, well, Daddy had to go somewhere for work, but guess what? We’re going to stay here for a while and you get to sleep in the sun room.”

All of the grandkids, especially the younger ones, loved the sun room. Ever since I could remember, Mom always told the kids she loved them as much as the sun loved flowers, so when I redecorated up here, I painted in one of the bedrooms a beautiful blue sky with a great big sun that had Mom’s face softly etched into it. I then painted flowers with each one of the grandkids faces in the center of them. My sisters thought it was creepy, but the kids thought it was cool, so the room quickly became a favorite of theirs.

Luckily, once I told her she was sleeping in there, she got all excited and went running back into the room.

I leaned back on the couch and closed my eyes. I still couldn’t believe all of this was happening, but I really had a hard time grasping that Aaron never called today and made no attempt to see the girls. Like my sister Kristie said, he was a wonderful husband and father and treated me like a queen. He had to be going through a mid-life crisis like Joyce said.

The growling of my stomach reminded me that I hadn’t eaten anything today. I had no appetite, but needed to feed the girls.

Please let Mom have some food up here because I really don’t want to go to the store, I thought as I opened the refrigerator.

To my surprise, it was stocked full of groceries, with a little sticky note that said Enjoy! Love, Mom & Dad.

What would I do without them? I thought as I grabbed some ham, lettuce and tomatoes and began making sandwiches. There was also a container of potato salad and tapioca pudding in there that I thought we could have too.

Just then my cell phone rang. My heart did a flip.

Is Aaron finally calling?

To my disappointment, it was Joyce instead. I let the call go straight to voicemail. The events from yesterday still haunted me, and the way she controlled a situation that wasn’t hers to control made me have no desire to talk to her at the moment. I loved her dearly, but I still needed some time to recover from that.

Our family felt incomplete without Aaron as we sat at the kitchen table eating our sandwiches. Mia was playing with her food instead of eating it, and Jenna was quiet with her head down, barely eating anything at all.

“So,” I asked Jenna, “what all did you do at Aunt Kellie’s today?”

Her blue eyes brightened a tad.

“We ice skated on their pond and then we went sledding on the big hill at the park. I was sliding down the hill so fast that I went airborne.”

Smiling as she continued with her story, I pretended as if I was listening, but my thoughts were elsewhere, far, far away elsewhere.

Later, after both girls had taken baths, the three of us were in the living room watching TV. Jenna was on the couch, and Mia was cuddled up on my lap about ready to fall asleep. I glanced over at Jenna, who was engrossed in the movie. Even though she had just turned ten, she seemed older, kind of like an old soul, as my dad would put it. She was a very pretty girl with bright blue eyes, just like mine, and brown hair that hung halfway down her back. Mia’s hair was long too, but was more brownish-blonde. She and Jenna were both spitting images of Aaron, and if you didn’t know any better, you would never guess that I was their mom.

While the two girls looked alike, they were different as night and day. Jenna loved to play sports, while Mia loved to dance and sing. Jenna would listen to us on first command, while Mia was more stubborn and would not. Jenna had Kristie’s dry sense of humor with good one-liners, and Mia was my little cuddle bunny who loved to give hugs and kisses.

Snuggling closer to Mia, I closed my eyes and tried not to think of how much I missed Aaron. Every night after supper, the four of us would clean the kitchen together and then hang out the rest of the evening watching TV, playing a game or just talking or teasing each other.

“Dad—stop it!” Jenna yelled, while Aaron was on top of her tickling her.

“Say it,” he teased.

“No, never,” she giggled.

“Say it or I’ll go for the pits.”

“Fine, fine. You’re the best basketball player in the family.”

“Say it louder,” he said, tickling her even harder.

“YOU’RE THE . . . GREATEST . . . BASKETBALL PLAYER . . . IN THE WORLD!”

“Thank-you,” he said with a big grin on his face.

Exhausted from laughing so hard, Jenna lay there breathing heavy, her little chest going up and down.

“You two,” I shook my head at them then went back to reading my book. With no warning at all, I was pulled down onto the floor. Laughter escaped my lips as I squirmed to get out of Aaron’s tight grip.

“Who’s the bestest husband in the world?”

“My dad,” I joked.

“Who?” he asked as he tickled me even harder.

“Stop, stop,” I pleaded in between my uncontrollable giggling . . .

“Mommy, I got to pee.”

Bringing me back to reality was Mia, who was tapping on my arm.

“Ah, okay, sweetie. You know what? It’s actually time for you to go to bed, so why don’t you tell Jenna night-night.”

“Night Jenna.”

“Night Mia. See you in the morning.”

After putting her to bed, I shut off the rest of the lights and lay at the other end of the couch that Jenna was on. She moved her legs to make room for mine as I snuggled underneath the blanket. We watched TV in silence a little while longer before I nudged her leg with my foot.

“You okay?” I softly asked.

She didn’t answer, but shrugged her shoulders.

“I’m so sorry this is happening.”

“It’s okay,” she said, looking back at the TV. It pained me to see her hurting this way. I wanted to say more, but it was obvious she didn’t, so I dropped the subject.

It wasn’t long after our conversation that she sat up on the couch, “I’m tired and ready for bed.”

“Okay. I’ll tuck you in.”

We walked in her room, and she climbed into bed.

“I love you Mom.”

“I love you too, sweetie.”

“Mom?”

“Yes?”

“Don’t be sad. We’ll get through this.”

Her blue eyes were dark and serious.

“Thank-you, sweetie.” I reached down and gave her a hug.

Hopefully one day I can tell her exactly how much her words meant to me.

Darkness and loneliness surrounded me as I lay in the living room by myself. These last couple of days had been very hard, but something that bothered me even more was the idea of facing people for the first time tomorrow. Because Versailles was a small community, everybody knew everybody. Our town was very close knit and known for pulling together in times of celebration and in times of sadness. When Gene passed away from cancer, there were nonstop visitors, cards, telephone calls and meals that poured in from everybody in town, and it was that love that helped us get through our loss.

I loved living here and having the safe feeling of knowing everyone around me, but there was one disadvantage and that was how news traveled fast. Some of the news was true, but a lot of it was not. By now, I wouldn’t be surprised if what happened between Aaron and me was already circulating around, with only half of it being the actual truth. And even though I taught in another town, it was only ten minutes from Versailles and everybody from here also knew everybody from there. There was no doubt in my mind that it would only be a matter of time before the news would be in that community too. Just thinking about it made me want to hide away up here forever and never face or see any of them ever again.

My head hurt and I was exhausted from all of this thinking, so I got back up from the couch and went into the bathroom. Not following the instructions on the bottle, I took three, not one, sleeping pills and prayed for just one second that all of the horrible details from the last three days would be erased.