Читать книгу The Complete Fab Confessions of Georgia Nicolson: Books 1-10 - Louise Rennison - Страница 295

After swimming today Miss Stamp came into the showers to make sure we all went in. She says we pretend to have a shower and that we are unhygienic. That is why she must supervise us. But really it is because she is a lesbian.

She watched a few of us go through (twirling her moustache). She shouted, “Come on, you silly ninnies, get in and get out!”

I dashed in in the nuddy-pants and was soaping myself like a maniac in order to get out quickly because Miss Stamp is a lesbian and might…well might…er…look at me. As if that wasn’t bad enough I had to be on even more red alert because Nauseating P. Green lumbered into the shower next to me. What if she accidentally touched me? It’s a sodding nightmare this place, like the Village of the Damned. If P. Green fell against me I would be smickled with Nauseatingness. She really is a most unfortunate shape. What on earth does she eat? All the pies, that is for sure. In fact, she has no shape. You can only tell which way up she is because of her glasses.

As I was getting dried I did feel a bit sorry for her because the Bummers had hidden her glasses while she was in the shower. She blundered around in the elephantine nuddy-pants, looking for them. The Bummers (who had managed to get out of games by “having the painters in” AGAIN! How many periods can you have in a month?) were singing, “Nellie the elephant packed her bags and said goodbye to the circus.” Then the bell went and the Bummers slouched off.

After they’d gone I gave P. Green her silly specs. She would have been in the shower rooms for the rest of her life otherwise. I hope she doesn’t think that makes me her mate.