Читать книгу A Quest for Healing – A Story of Love - EBOOK - Wendy Carol Abelson RNCP ROHP - Страница 18

The winter passed, and I continued along my path of healing. I prayed to God for hope. Some elements of my health had stabilized while others were still on shaky ground, but light was on the horizon.

The spring of 1987 marked the beginning of adventures that would prove to be beyond belief. I learned to stretch beyond my concepts about life and to open myself to exciting new possibilities. I learned about a man in India who had performed many miracles. This man was even known to heal the sick.

It was also written in books that Sai Baba was aware of everything about a person. He was omniscient, which meant that he was conscious of all things happening at all places and times. If I merely spoke to Sai Baba in my mind, it was said that he would hear me. How was this possible?

My brother James was engaged to be married in May to a beautiful woman from India. Lakshmi was a devotee of Sai Baba, and through her I learned about the miracles surrounding this Divine Being. I was eager to determine if the stories were true.

A week before James’ and Lakshmi’s wedding, Michael came to Calgary for a visit. It had been many months since I had seen him, and I was overjoyed to be with Michael again. His friendship enriched my life greatly by helping me to see my health and journey of healing in new ways.

Michael and I decided to go camping for a couple days at the natural hot springs near Canal Flats. We pitched our tent by a river that was surrounded by rolling hills and beautiful green pine trees. “Shall we head for the hot springs?” asked Michael as the last tent peg was put into place.

“I’m all for it.” I eagerly replied.

We followed the road until we came to a small path. “It’s down there. Have a look,” said Michael. There were three natural pools that had been made by gathering large rocks to contain the water. Each pool was on a different level of the hill as it sloped down toward the river. The water poured out of the top pool to fill the two pools below it. This created the effect of a small waterfall.

“It’s absolutely gorgeous. Let’s get in,” I said excitedly.

A narrow path led to the bottom of the hill. “The top pool is very hot and the other two are cooler. You can also go for an icy plunge in the river,” said Michael.

“No thanks. I think I’ll stick to the warm stuff.” My turquoise bathing suit was underneath my clothes. I tore everything off and plunged into the steaming water. “This is wonderful!”

Michael joined me and we both leaned against the rocks in the shallow pool. “So James and Lakshmi are getting married this weekend,” said Michael.

“They both look incredibly happy together. I know they are perfect for each other,” I said. The words “perfect for each other” echoed through my being as I looked at Michael.

“It will be interesting to see an Indian ceremony,” said Michael. A Hindu wedding was one of elaborate rituals of spiritual significance. I was happy that Michael would be there to share it with me.

“Sai Baba gave his blessings for the wedding when Lakshmi’s Mom was in India. Baba sounds like an extraordinary person. I wish I had known about him before this,” I said.

“I told you about Sai Baba when you visited me in California.”

“Oh, yes! Now I remember the picture in Tony’s hallway.” Michael’s friend was an avid Sai Baba devotee.

“Tony spoke with Baba when he was in India.” Michael playfully splashed water at me as he spoke. “Baba is a very wise being,” said Michael with an Indian accent.

A man appeared from the small wood shack that covered the upper pool. I thought we had been alone. “I couldn’t help overhearing your conversation about Sai Baba. This Divine Being is well known for his miracles and gifts of love,” he said.

“Wendy’s brother is getting married on the weekend. Baba said that he would be there,” said Michael.

“He’ll be there in spirit,” said the man. Ken introduced himself with a friendly smile and a warm handshake. Our conversation became centered on spiritual ideas and concepts. It was intriguing that Michael and I would meet a man in a remote area of the woods who knew so much about Sai Baba.

“I am just learning about Baba,” I said.

“In the west, many spiritual teachers have led people to believe that spirituality can be purchased with money. The only thing that Sai Baba asks for is your love,” said Ken.

“That is encouraging,” I grinned. Sai Baba obviously lived by the values that he taught. I had read about his life being his message. It was wonderful to find a spiritual teacher who walked the talk.

“Where are you from, Ken?” asked Michael.

“Planet Earth,” laughed Ken. “My wife and I have spent the last year traveling. We were in Mexico last month. Home is where we park the van.” Ken told us many tales about his travels to Mexico and his adventures on his spiritual path. His life experience was an inspiration.

“It’s been great to hear about your travels, Ken. It brings back some fond memories of my own journeys,” said Michael.

“Yes it is great to meet a fellow wanderer,” grinned Ken.

“It’s time for Wendy and me to head back to our campsite. We have to light a fire before dinner. All this fresh air works up an appetite.”

“It was nice meeting you, Ken,” I said as Michael and I climbed out of the rock pool. We walked over to where our clothes were lying on a rock. “How am I going to change into my clothes? There is no privacy here,” I whispered to Michael.

“Do it California style?” Michael put his towel around his waist and slipped on a pair of jeans.

“That’s easy for you. You’re a guy. That only solves half my problem,” I said modestly. There were many issues that I needed to overcome. Embarrassment was one of them. Michael laughed and stood in front of me while holding his towel around my body. “Private showing eh?” I said laughing. At least no one could see me from the road above.

Michael and I walked back to our campsite as the evening sun faded behind the trees. We made a fire in the round pit by our tent. Making dinner was difficult because we had remembered dishes, but not the utensils. I burned my fingers while attempting to flip salmon patties in the frying pan. The lid from the salmon tin was not a good spatula, but at least we had a can opener.

We curled up by the fire with our dinner of salmon patties, rice and vegetables. “Food seems to taste so good when it’s cooked outdoors,” I said.

“Are there any seconds?” asked Michael.

I filled Michael’s plate with the food that was left in the frying pan. “It seems like an irony that we are enjoying the luxury of a second helping, when there are many starving people in the world.” I wondered what I could do to make a difference.

“In North America obesity is a problem, and in third world countries the problem is starvation. Where is the balance?” asked Michael.

“It is a crime that so much food is wasted. Some farmers and supermarkets dump food that doesn’t look pretty. A carrot needs to be straight, or it’s not accepted. It just doesn’t make sense to waste food,” I said.

“The real problem is much more complex than the issue of food,” said Michael. “It is about power and money.”

“Would it help if everyone reduced the amount of meat they ate? I’ve heard that it takes twelve pounds of grain to produce one pound of meat. That much grain would certainly feed more people than one pound of beef.”

“It makes sense to reduce the amount of meat that we eat so that more food is available for everyone,” said Michael. This was an idea that meat producers would not welcome.

“Baba emphasizes a vegetarian diet.” Many spiritual leaders from the East believed that a vegetarian diet was necessary in order to follow a spiritual path. I had mixed feelings about this idea. “I think it is important to eat meat in moderation and with a sense of gratitude to the animal that gave its life for us. That is just my opinion.”

“Sounds like a reasonable opinion,” grinned Michael.

“As I learn about the miracles that surround Sai Baba, I wish that it was possible for me to go see him.”

“Why do you talk as if it’s not possible for you to go?” asked Michael.

“I haven’t seriously thought about it.” I had been in a state of wishful thinking. “I sometimes limit myself because of my health.”

“The only limitations you have, are those that you accept,” said Michael.

“Lakshmi gave me a video about Sai Baba. There are some amazing stories on that tape. Either Baba is a very talented magician or he really is one with God.”

“I’d like to see that video,” said Michael.

“There are people from all over the world who go to India to see Sai Baba. It is wonderful that people from different religions go there as well. Can you imagine a place where people of many faiths live together in harmony?”

“Now that is a rare thing,” said Michael.

“Sai Baba teaches that Love is the road to God, so why would it matter if you followed one religion or another? There is one thread that runs through all the faiths and that is Love.”

“In the end we are all headed toward the same place, and that is God,” said Michael.

“I believe that is true. Baba says that there is only one religion, the religion of love. There is only one language, the language of the heart. There is only one race, the race of humanity. There is only one God, and He is omnipresent.”

“God is everywhere,” commented Michael.

“Sai Baba brought a man back to life who died of diabetic kidney failure. The man was completely cured afterwards. Baba is supposed to be able to perform miracles like Jesus did.” Baba had cured numerous people of serious health ailments. I had seen an example of this on a video done by Richard Bock. He filmed Walter talking about his experience with death. When Walter was eighty-four years old, he died of a diabetic condition and diseased kidneys. Elsie, Walter’s wife, held him in her arms as he passed from this life.

Sai Baba came to the hospital to raise Walter from the dead. Walter described passing over to the other side as a calm experience. Sai Baba was there with him and a group of gentlemen who outlined all of Walter’s past existence as a soul. Baba spoke up and said he wanted Walter’s soul. The group said, “So be it.” Walter then came back to life!

The doctor who witnessed this miracle got test results back later that showed Walter’s kidneys and diabetes were healed. “I can see why the story of healing diabetic kidney failure would inspire you,” said Michael. It brought me hope that one day I could be healed of diabetes. “Healing is inside you, Wendy. I am sure that one day you will find it.”

“Walter and Elise had a remarriage ceremony done by Sai Baba. I got to see this on the video too. Baba seemed to almost joke about bringing Walter back to life so he could perform the wedding ritual.”

“When one speaks their marriage vows and says I do till death do us part, it is a literal statement,” chuckled Michael.

“Lakshmi has seen Sai Baba’s miracles herself! She used to learn Indian Classical dance with a girl who was cured by Baba. The girl had been paralyzed from an accident and no doctor could give her hope.”

“A situation like that would motivate one to look for answers beyond traditional medicine,” commented Michael.

“Sai Baba materialized a pendent for Lakshmi’s friend who could not walk. From that day, she began to recover. Now she is dancing!”

“Miracles can happen for you too,” said Michael.

I had read numerous books about Sai Baba. Each one inspired hope and brought the message that Love was the path to follow in life. It was from Love that all true healing would occur. “The most difficult thing for me to believe, even though I saw it on the video, is that Sai Baba can materialize objects. They literally come out of his hand,” I said.

“Why is that so difficult for you to believe when you say that anything is possible?” asked Michael.

“It is certainly beyond my understanding.” There were doubts in my mind about the stories. I wanted to believe they were true because then my own healing was possible.

Michael picked up a stick and moved the logs around in the fire. He knelt by the flames and put out his hands to warm them. I watched the silhouette of his body as the shadow of flames danced across his face. Michael’s lips formed a mischievous grin and he began to speak in a goofy voice. “I’m wild and crazy man and I like to make love to innocent women sitting by campfire.”

“Sounds like fun to me,” I said.

“I was just teasing. You’re supposed to run away.” Michael had been joking, but I was serious. I wondered why we could not be lovers as well as friends. Perhaps, Michael feared that being my lover would involve a commitment. I understood that Michael was unable to commit to anyone because freedom was so important to him. I also knew that he did not want to hurt me.

We watched the fire as it gave its last flicker. Michael sat quietly and looked like he was deep in thought. “Is there something on your mind?” I asked.

“Not really, just contemplating life,” said Michael. It was obvious that Michael did not want to share his thoughts.

We climbed into our sleeping bags as the heat from the fire dwindled. Without the warmth of the fire, it was cold and damp. “It gets chilly here at night,” I said shivering.

“You can say that again,” said Michael as he snuggled against my body. I fell into a peaceful sleep, feeling grateful that I was being held by a man that I loved so dearly.

The next morning the sun shone through the tall pine trees, casting shadows of cool air. I sat in the sun on top of the picnic table. The fresh mountain air filled my lungs with the scent of pine. “Good morning,” I said to Michael as he stuck his head out of the tent. “It’s a beautiful day.”

“It looks like a good day for exploring,” said Michael. We headed for a nearby lake that was beside a meadow filled with wild flowers. The crystal-clear lake reflected the pine trees and the gorgeous mountains that were in the background. A blanket, placed on soft tufts of green grass, provided the perfect setting for our breakfast of fruit and yogurt.

Michael was silent for a while, lost in thought. “What are you thinking about?” I asked.

“There have been many questions on my mind,” said Michael. “I keep wondering what I should be doing with my life.”

“I can relate,” I said.

“I have an opportunity to wholesale crystals with some people who are in the business, but I’m not sure that is what I want to do.”

“You once said to me that Life guides us in all things if we are willing to listen. I see in my own life how so called coincidences have actually been guidance from a Higher Power or whatever you want to call it. Maybe all you have to do is listen to that and your choice will be clear.”

“At times I don’t slow down enough to listen. Thanks for reminding me,” said Michael.

“Sai Baba says that every living being is knowingly or unknowingly on a spiritual pilgrimage. I believe we are all here to help each other along the way. You have certainly helped me!” I said as I savoured a strawberry from our array of breakfast treats.

“It’s true that we learn from our interactions with each other. It’s just a matter of taking time to reflect on the experience,” said Michael, running his fingers through his hair.

“Sometimes guidance comes in a direct way from God. There is a Sai Baba story about a woman who awoke one night to find a bright light hovering over her bed. It told her to improve her diet and to begin studying natural healing.” I wished that God could give me instructions that were that clear and specific. I often felt like I was stumbling in the dark for direction in my life.

“Have you heard of vibhuti?” asked Michael. Vibhuti was a sacred ash that was said to have the flavor and fragrance of flowers. Sai Baba materialized this vibhuti from his hand and gave it to his devotees to bless and heal them. This action reminded me of Christian communion.

“The video I saw showed Baba materializing gallons of vibhuti out of an overturned container. The moment he would remove his hand from the container the flow would stop. Then he would put his hand back in and the flow of vibhuti would continue.”

“There is much to the mysteries surrounding Sai Baba,” said Michael.

“It could not be a trick because the container was too small compared to the amount of vibhuti pouring out of it.” There were also stories about vibhuti appearing on pictures of Sai Baba that were all over the world.

“When it comes to these stories, a person needs to see with their heart and not with their mind alone. Faith can be a big step,” said Michael. Doubts continued to haunt me because I did not understand how these events were possible.

That night, Michael and I headed for the hot springs after midnight. The stars shone above us as the marvelous hot water surrounded our bodies. We had the pools all to ourselves. Michael lit a few candles and placed them randomly on the rocks around the pool. “Look over there at the shooting star,” said Michael.

“Wow!” I experienced the wonderment of a child as I watched the spark of light flash across the sky. It had been fifteen years since I had seen a shooting star.

“It’s very beautiful and peaceful here,” said Michael. The only sounds were the river and the small waterfall as it poured over the rocks into the pools below us. Michael held my hand as we leaned against the rocks and enjoyed the warmth of the mineral waters.

“I’ve been having some dreams about Sai Baba lately. It’s said that Sai Baba will not be in your dreams unless he wants to be there. Do you think that’s true?”

“It could be true,” commented Michael.

“I’ve also had some interesting dreams about you that I don’t understand.” I was silent for a few moments because I was hesitant about sharing the contents of my dreams. “Do you think dreams mean anything in particular?”

“I think that guidance can come from dreams as to what one needs to do in life. Sometimes there is valuable insight,” said Michael.

“Do you remember when I first met you? I had that dream about seeing your face become my face, and then your face?”

“Yes,” said Michael.

“I had this dream again but there was more to it. I heard a voice say that I was looking into the eyes of my soulmate. What is that?”

Michael’s body tightened as he let go of my hand. “Ramtha teaches that souls were once positive and negative energy joined together to form one light or soul. This is how we all began. These lights or souls split so that one soul can experience both a male and female existence. The two halves that were once joined together are called soulmates.”

I did not fully understand Michael’s explanation, but it sparked desire in me to learn more. Everything in nature had both a positive and negative electrical charge. At one time, were Michael and I a united form of light? I judged my thoughts as weird. I told myself to get back to reality, but what was reality anyway? “Do you believe this teaching?” I asked.

“Not really.” Michael made a few excuses as to why he did not believe in soulmates. His excuses did not make sense to me, but I decided to remain silent. I wondered why this simple idea would make him so uncomfortable.

“I had another dream about you in which I carried you in my arms down a spiral staircase. The further we went down the steps, the younger you became until I was holding a small child. At the same time, I was watching your life go by on a big screen.” The dream had shown me pictures of Michael’s childhood. I saw an angry frustrated child who had gone through many painful experiences.

Michael listened with interest and this sparked my curiosity. “What you are describing, does sound like my childhood,” he said. He quickly changed the subject.

We sat in the steaming water for a considerable time and I began to feel weak. “I think I need to get out of this hot water.”

I sat on the rocks by the pool, and Michael passed me a jug of water. “Drink some of this. It might help.”

The path to the road was very steep and I found it difficult to climb in my weakened condition. I clutched Michael’s arm as we made our way up the path. “I need to stop for a minute. I feel like I’m going to pass out.” Many thoughts whirled around in my head. “Michael, I’ve never felt like this.” My heart pounded rapidly against my chest as my head spun.

“Did you ask for assistance?”

I looked up at the sky and pleaded, “God, Jesus, Ramtha, Sai Baba, anybody, please help me!” My body began to tingle with energy as I stared up at the sky. Michael put his arm around me and helped me to the top of the hill. I began to feel better as we reached the road. “I just realized something, thanks to you. I sometimes forget to ask for help when I need it.”

“It’s important to be able to ask for what you need. It’s so simple that sometimes we forget.” Life’s lessons were not always complex, but this did not mean that they were always easy to see.