Читать книгу Successful Networking in 7 simple steps - Clare Dignall - Страница 10

When you are building an effective and supportive network it is important to know exactly who you can rely on in a tight spot. We have all heard the old saying ‘blood is thicker than water’ and many of us assume that our strongest ties are those that are related to us through blood or marriage. But in the world of business, it is often safest to assume nothing. It can be enlightening, at regular periods, to ask yourself the following questions:

 Am I happy with who is closest to me?

When we talk about the people that are ‘closest’ to us, we usually include family and long-standing friends in that list. They are the people who have known us the longest, we spend most time with, and in most instances, have partially ‘created’ the person that we are now through long years of parenting, peer interaction, schooling and socializing. We unquestioningly assume they are on our side. But are they? Time to ask yourself a tough question: ‘Am I still happy with how much my family and friends influence me?’ Perhaps you seek the approval of parents or friends a little too much? Are your peers suspicious of success? Are you staying in a job you don’t want because you feel that’s what’s expected of you? If your aim to is to change the way your life looks, you may have to work out whether there are any people, very close to you, that are limiting you.

 Who would I turn to in a crisis?

It’s likely that asking yourself the first question will have revealed some unsettling home truths. By asking just one more tough question, you will find out who your real friends are. Imagine yourself in an awful situation. You’ve lost your job, your business is failing, or you’re going through a gruelling period of stress at work. Who, in reality, would you turn to? Without analysing too much, quickly write down a list of the people you would turn to first for advice and help. You may be surprised by what you see. If some of the entries on that list are people that you would never have counted as strong ties – are not family, and whom you see rarely, it may be time to sort that out. These people are clearly important to you on many levels: make it a priority to invest some time in them now. If you ever are to be faced with that worst-case scenario, you want them wholly on your side.

By asking two simple questions, you are likely to have a much clearer idea about who you want ‘on your team’. Some people are just plain good for us – they are supportive, trustworthy, positive and inspiring – in their company we aspire to greater things. Some people are not so good for us and can seriously limit what we can achieve. The trick is identifying who is who, and we’ll find out more later.