Читать книгу The Positive Woman - Gael Lindenfield, Gael Lindenfield - Страница 14

This is a very common fear, i.e. that ‘digging up the dirt’ through self-examination and exploration of the past experiences will bring overwhelming despair and depression. Certainly many people I have worked with find they have a very large backlog of tears to shed and do cry out at times, ‘Will it ever stop?’ But of course, it does, and then comes the feeling of relief and renewed energy.

As people become more experienced at doing personal development work, they learn to have more and more control over the buried tears and are able to choose to shed them in safe and supportive places – for example in the comfort and warmth of their own homes or in the arms of close and trusted friends who will not panic in the presence of their grief but simply be with them until it passes. As someone who has experienced the deep despair of serious life-threatening depression, I know that it is a condition of non-feeling, totally different from the reflective sadness and grief that we can experience as we recall and examine aspects of our past.

I knew that my cure would never be complete unless I could openly associate myself with two words; two words that had been my secret shame for so long, namely ‘illegitimate’ and ‘bastard’.

Catherine Cookson, talking about her breakdown

If any of these negative messages have been ringing bells for you – or, indeed, if you have any others – you must deal with your resistance first. If you begin your self-exploration with such attitudes, you will not only make the whole process feel like hard work, but you may also influence your objectivity, for if you expect to find trouble, your perception and memory will surely bring it out for you! Of course, you may recall sad times and experiences, temporary attacks of anxiety, self-doubt and cynicism, but remember that that is not the whole story!