Читать книгу It’s Called a Breakup Because It’s Broken: The Smart Girl’s Breakup Buddy - Greg Behrendt - Страница 7

It’s past two in the morning. You’re on your third glass of wine. You’re wearing his sweater because it still smells like him (and quite frankly, he never really smelled that great, but I’m going to give it to you because I’ve been there). I’ve been the saddest girl in the world, with a mangled heart and the certainty that getting over him was impossible. I’ve been the girl so in love with a person incapable of giving me what I needed out of a relationship that I not only married him but gladly gave away every last shred of my self-esteem to keep him. I’ve been the girl who not only suffers through an unhealthy, demoralizing relationship but then goes back to it in hopes that time spent apart has inspired him to love me enough to change…or even try. And guess what? It didn’t. I’ve been consumed with despair, confusion, anger—truly devastated by the end of a relationship that I thought was going to last forever. I’ve cried into glass after glass of pinot grigio, smoked packs of cigarettes, lost my appetite, my ability to sleep, and my ability to function. I’ve obsessed, rebounded, been pissed, sought professional help, leaned on my friends, moved across the country, got dogs, made new friends, shopped excessively, and even had other boyfriends who did love me despite the fact that I was still so hung up on the past that I was completely incapable of giving them what they needed from me. Truth be told, I rode that horse long after it had up and died and married someone else. On the outside, I wore the illusion that I was over it and that the end of the marriage was best for us both. But that charade was all smoke and mirrors and empty words. Being brokenhearted is like having broken ribs. On the outside it looks like nothing’s wrong, but every breath hurts. Let’s just say my ribs were broken for a long time.

Now, it may surprise you to hear that in all other areas of my life I was confident and successful. It’s true. I had a kick-ass job, made good money, had lots of friends, a great apartment, cool clothes, excellent taste in music, etc.…But for whatever reason, getting over this guy took forever. He was my kryptonite. And like Superman, I was powerless in his wake. But if you’ve seen the movies, you know that Superman always figures out a way to overcome kryptonite. And thankfully, I did too.

Now, defeating kryptonite and getting over a broken heart is incredibly tough. It’s also wildly empowering. But the even bigger victory is finally living your own life again without the constant presence of heartache. That’s the goal, and we’re here to help you get there. I’ve stood where you’re standing now, broken to the point that I couldn’t get past the idea that my life wasn’t turning out the way I’d planned. But guess what? Once I got through it and started living my life differently, making better decisions and demanding more from myself and for myself, I got a windfall that I never imagined. Today, my life is even better than I ever dreamed or planned. I have a husband whom I adore and whose love and devotion for me blows my mind every day. I have two beautiful daughters who are the funniest and most delightful people I’ve ever had the joy of knowing. And I have the very best friends and family in the world, whom I am grateful for every day. I would have missed it all if I’d wasted my life trailing after my ex and staying stuck in my grief. It’s like my Granny always said:“Even with all the mayonnaise in the world, you can’t make chicken salad out of chicken shit.” Feel free to apply that wisdom to your bad relationship.

Love,Amiira