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Babysitting

How old should a child be to babysit other children?

According to the Royal Society for the Prevention of Accidents, no one under the age of sixteen should be left to care for an infant or young child. However, there’s no current legislation that gives a minimum age for babysitters.

Your babysitter should be someone you trust to handle any emergency or who will at least know whom to call and what procedures to follow. Parents should assess carefully a babysitter under the age of sixteen. In some circumstances, parents can be prosecuted if any harm comes to their child while a babysitter under sixteen years old is supervising; no child under sixteen years old can be held responsible for children in their care. This changes dramatically over the age of sixteen, however, when there is a full legal duty of care.

The British Red Cross runs babysitting courses for teenagers. Children must be over the age of fourteen in order to attend. You can find out more about these courses from its website at www.redcross.org.uk. If you use a babysitter regularly, it might be worth paying for this training.

WHAT SHOULD I DO IF MY BABYSITTER IS UNDER SIXTEEN YEARS OLD?

The Royal Society for the Prevention of Accidents (RoSPA) offers the following advice for parents who plan to leave a child with someone under the age of sixteen.

You must be prepared to take some responsibility for anything that should go wrong in your absence. You must also be prepared to take responsibility for the care and safety of your babysitter, including making arrangements for the sitter’s safe return home. Never let a young babysitter travel home alone late at night.

You need to know that your babysitter is a competent person.

Define the qualities you are looking for in a good babysitter: for example, responsible, mature, reliable, honest, capable, tolerant, patient, kind but firm, has experience with young children, has first aid experience, etc.

Make sure the babysitter knows how and when to call the Emergency Services if it should become necessary.

Encourage your babysitter to visit your home and get to know the child or children who will be left in his or her care. It will also help the babysitter understand the particular household and the children’s day-time and night-time routines.

Give an honest opinion when your babysitter asks to have friends to sit with them (same sex or opposite sex). Use common sense and remember that babysitting can be a lonely business.

Make adequate preparations for your babysitter not only in terms of refreshments but also by giving him or her enough information to cover all eventualities. Make sure your sitter knows where everything is.

Never take advantage of a babysitter by leaving him or her to cope with an already sick or upset child who you know will not settle.

Never leave a babysitter alone with several children for long periods of time.

Always return home as close to the time you agreed with your babysitter as you can. If you are going to be late, inform the babysitter, if possible.

Talk to your babysitter about the child’s progress and give him or her up-to-date information; this is especially important if the sitter does not see your child regularly.

If you feel unhappy about any aspect of the care of your child, talk it over with the babysitter.

Are the guidelines different if the babysitter is minding his or her own siblings?

At present, there are no guidelines for babysitting whatsoever, although most children’s charities, including the National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children (NSPCC), do not recommend that anyone under the age of sixteen be left in sole charge of other children, including siblings. So, in a nutshell, there is nothing to stop you from asking older children to babysit younger siblings, no matter what their age.

On a personal note, my two oldest children watched their baby/toddler brother from the age of fourteen; however, they usually did it together, we were never more than 20 minutes away, and our maximum time away from the home was no more than four hours. All enjoyed the experience, particularly when the older ones were given a little extra money for their efforts. I looked after my younger siblings and neighbours’ children from the age of twelve and took the responsibility seriously.

What must a babysitter be prepared for?

However, no matter what the age of the older siblings, they must be prepared for any eventuality, and this applies to all babysitters.

They must be reminded of the responsibility and the importance of diligence. A toddler can stick a finger in a socket, get his hands on a sharp object or ingest a poisonous substance in a few seconds’ flat. Babysitters must keep an eye on them at all times.

Babysitters should be able to lock and unlock doors and windows, and operate the alarm system.

Babysitters should not answer the door unless they know the person well, and should never tell anyone on the telephone that they are home alone.

They need to know how to contact the Emergency Services, and there should be a list of important numbers by the telephone, including the doctor, your mobile, the poison control centre, and a neighbour or two.

They should know what to do if there is a power cut (torches are probably safer than candles in the hands of children; make sure they know where they are), a flood or a fire.

Babysitters should know how to administer basic first aid, if a child chokes, for example, or cuts himself. Leave a first-aid kit in an agreed place.

Discuss what is acceptable. Can your child have a friend round? Are there any forbidden activities (cooking, lighting the fire, drinking alcohol, for example)? Can they visit the park or the shops? Can they bathe a younger sibling?

Make sure there is always someone who can act as a back-up in your absence. Sometimes children just need a little reassurance that they are doing the right thing or that fears are unjustified. Making an agreement with nearby parents who have children of similar age to act as advisor when the other is out might be useful.

My 14-year-old daughter is keen to earn money babysitting and I’m nervous about the responsibility she is taking on. Is she old enough? How can I prepare her?

If your daughter is mature and practical, it could be an ideal job. She needs to be aware that it isn’t just a ‘fun’ or ‘easy’ moneymaking opportunity, and that looking after children can be hard work, tiring and difficult (even for seasoned adults). She must also know that it is often lonely work and a big responsibility. Although she cannot be held legally liable for accidents that occur while she is caring for other children (this remains a parent’s responsibility until their sitter is sixteen years old), it can be distressing and potentially damaging to feel responsible when something goes wrong.

Are there any courses?

It’s worth arranging for your child to take a babysitting course, such as that offered by the Red Cross (see page), so that she feels confident enough to deal with eventualities. Young children can become ill and are liable to accidents and mishaps, and your daughter will need to know how to cope with emergencies. Take the time, too, to talk through basic safety in the home, and help her to identify potential risks.

For the first few occasions, you may wish to be available to answer questions or to provide back-up if your daughter is uncertain.

IS YOUR CHILD MATURE ENOUGH TO BE LEFT ALONE TO BABYSIT?

If you are trying to assess your child’s readiness to be at home alone, discuss the possibility with him or her and listen to your child’s reactions. Do they look forward to the idea or are they hesitant about it? It is also helpful if you observe reactions to daily situations: do they rely on you to plan their every minute or do they enjoy planning their own time? Do they panic when the unexpected happens? Do they relish a little freedom and like responsibility? Are they familiar with emergency procedures, for example, in the event of a break-in, fire, flood or even a power failure?

What’s the maximum length of time a child should be allowed to babysit?

While there are clear guidelines for children in paid employment (such as not working after 7 pm on a school night, or for more than two hours during term-time; see page), this does not extend to babysitting. Common sense, therefore, must prevail.

A young teenager babysitting very young children will need a break – so three or four hours should really be the maximum for any babysitter under the age of fourteen or fifteen. After the age of sixteen, longer hours are acceptable, but consider the fact that looking after children (particularly if they are not your own) can be tiring and frustrating. If you can arrange for a little cover so that your sitter can take a break, or if you know your child will have a nap or relax in front of a DVD or television programme for an hour or so, giving the sitter some breathing space, then longer periods are acceptable. However, be realistic about what is achievable and the limits to endurance. If a child goes to bed early, a longer evening stint is acceptable, and if a child regularly sleeps through the night, your sitter is over sixteen years old and comfortable with the idea, then overnight babysitting may be OK too.

Can siblings babysit younger siblings overnight?

The NSPCC does not recommend that any child under the age of sixteen babysit (which is certainly open to personal circumstances and discretion), but it also suggest that no child be left alone overnight until he or she is sixteen. On this basis, if your elder child is over sixteen, is comfortable with the idea of being left alone overnight with his or her sibling, and is aware of how to deal with emergencies, it’s certainly acceptable. One recent study found that 91 per cent of those polled thought that fourteen was old enough to be left alone overnight (although not for an extended number of nights), so clearly many parents believe their children are mature and/or capable enough to manage. It may, therefore, be that your 14-year-old is deemed mature enough to watch a sibling overnight, particularly if the child or children in question are good sleepers and will get through the night without being distressed or requiring intervention. But babysitting is not the same as staying alone, and your child needs to be aware that he is being given a big responsibility for long-term care.

Should I expect my children to babysit their younger siblings on the weekends?

In a well-balanced household, it is acceptable for the weight of responsibility to be shared between all family members. Childcare certainly falls into this category. So yes, theoretically, your children should be encouraged to do their part and babysit.

If your older child is under sixteen years of age, you must be prepared to take responsibility for anything that should go wrong in your absence. You are also responsible for the care and safety of your older child.