Читать книгу The Complete Fab Confessions of Georgia Nicolson: Books 1-10 - Louise Rennison - Страница 509

In a rare moment of sanity Vati has been over to see Mr and Mrs Across the Road and pleaded for Angus’s manhood. He was all pleased with himself when he came back.

“I thought I’d take a look at that garden fence, Connie, see if we can keep Angus in a bit more. Then he might not have to have his biscuits nibbled.”

Biscuits nibbled? What planet does he live on?

He started rooting around in the toolbox. I wish he would get a job and then he wouldn’t be interested in DIY any more.

Mum said, “Bob, I beg you, please get someone competent to do the fence. You’re only just back on your feet again.”

Vati got all Daddish.

“Connie, I can fix a fence, you know.”

We laughed. I helped Mum out: “Dad, there was the unfortunate leg through the ceiling incident when you last went into the loft.”

“There was a weakness in the roof.”

“Yeah, Dad, that was you.”

“Don’t be so bloody cheeky.”

I am not wrong though. The electrician who came to look at the fridge that blew up after Dad has “fixed it” accused Dad of being a madman.

And the shed fell down on Uncle Eddie.

But grown-ups will never be told anything until it is too late. That is the sadnosity of grown-ups.

As Vati went into the cupboard under the stairs Mum looked at me, but what was I supposed to do? It’s her husband, she should stop him. He came out of the cupboard with a hammer and a saw. I said, “Well, probably catch up with you later in casualty then, Dad.”

He swore in a very unpleasant way.

Actually, Mum is probably hoping he will injure himself. She hasn’t had any excuse to go see gorgeous Dr Clooney for a week or so. Libby can’t have any more vaccinations – she’s practically a pin-cushion as it is – and I am not going to sustain any more sports injuries to help her out.

As I was just going to escape through the door Vati put his foot down with a firm hand.

“Georgia, make yourself useful. Take Angus out on his lead. Get him out from under my feet.”

I put Angus’s lead on him while he playfully bit my shins. He’s mad for fun. We reached the bottom of the hill in about two seconds flat because he caught wind of a tiny little Pekinese. The owner had to take refuge in a shop.