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Rotten Fruit

Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.

Proverbs 18:21

I was in the grocery store after work one day. There is always something we need. I really dislike going to the store after work. It is always crowded and they never have enough people on the cash registers.

As I perused the cereal aisle with my daughter, saying no to every overpriced, sugar coated, gaily colored box of pre-diabetic breakfast offerings, I saw a woman that I had known for more than twenty years. Twenty five years ago, we spent plenty of time together. She had witnessed and encouraged me through some of my lowest moments. When I saw her, I ducked down another aisle. I found myself creeping down the infant section, hoping she would get far enough ahead that I could get out of the store without being spotted.

It was not to be. I had not gotten past her radar. I resigned myself; I was going to have to speak with her.

As she plunged headlong into filling me in on all of her woes, I found myself growing more and more uneasy. My daughter stood next to me and switched glances between me and her. She had been fired, had to file bankruptcy, could not find another job, had run up massive credit card debit and in all of it she never once assumed responsibility for any part of it. She was being ganged up on by the world. The county were against her, the school had wronged her son, her employer cheated her and on and on she went. I politely nodded and expressed my sympathy concerning her difficulties. She moved on to complaining about her ex-husband and what she had gone through with him eighteen years ago when he was out of work. She bounced from present to past troubles for at least twenty minutes.

I realized as I listened to her that not only had her life of drama continued just as it had been twenty five years ago, moreover she had not changed anything about herself. Her hair was the same length and color it had always been. She was dressed as I had always seen her in jeans and a T-shirt. Even her eye shadow was the same. It was as if nothing had changed for her.

Throughout the evening the thought rolled around in my brain; why had she chosen to stay stagnant?

I think it started with her not letting go of the past. It seemed that for the past twenty five years, this woman had been riding a loop of drama, assuming the role of victim and shunning all responsibilities. She spewed negativity.

It was her words that kept her riding the loop. Nothing out of her mouth was positive. She seemed to ooze the negative.

I am guilty of this at times as well. Sometimes my words are laced with toxicity. I allow myself to speak defeat rather than victory. In order to stop speaking death you have to adjust your way of thinking. Everything begins with the way we think. Our attitude is the difference between defeat and victory and sometimes it can mean the difference to those around us. If our speech is negative and defeatist then that is what we emit to those around us. Family and friends will begin to adopt our speech, and that in turn will infect their attitude. A bad attitude is like rotten fruit it infects the good.

When I spent a lot of time around this woman my speech and then my attitude was poisoned. It took a while to rid myself of her way of thinking and reacting. She saw everything as a problem, not an opportunity. She believed that everything that had happened to her was uncontrollable circumstance rather the consequences of the choices she had made.

Whereas it is true that there are circumstances that are out of control how we choose to face them is wholly ours. Your attitude in any situation is the key to whether you have victory or defeat. As believers, our attitude and our speech should reflect our trust in God.

I encourage you to examine your words. Your words have the power to spread life and death, not just to you, but to those around you.

Proverbs 18:21 says that we will shall eat the fruit thereof. I’d rather eat the sweet and skip the bitter.