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#5 Avoid Direct Confrontation

Maybe it’s this silent, desktop world we inhabit. Maybe it’s the new culture of positivity and triumph over depression. But having a big confrontation, complete with shouting, threats, revelations and tears, is a decidedly old, out-of-it thing to do.

If young people want to drop you or stop seeing you, they’ll just stop returning your messages. Or defriend you on Facebook. If they’re angry about something you’ve done to them, they’ll blog about it. Or send topless pictures of you on their mobile phones to all their friends. I’m not kidding.

So what do you do if you have a problem with someone young? First, do some deep breathing, take a yoga class, smoke a joint, drink a martini – whatever you need to do to get in a more, ahem, relaxed mood. Then, if you must raise the issue, do so electronically, couched in passive-aggressive – or even passive-passive – language. Say you’re having some ‘issues’ with the ‘process’. Or rather, say ‘I’m wondering whether you’re having an issue with our process?’

Question marks at the end of every sentence are good. Then, if the other person responds, don’t reply. Or take at least twice as long to respond as he or she took in the first place. If you’re as wise as you should be by your age, you’ll learn to keep your mouth shut until the problem disappears by itself … or the offending young person moves away.