Читать книгу The Interpersonal Communication Playbook - Teri Kwal Gamble - Страница 54

Gender is a social creation that imposes a sense of social order by reflecting the societal characteristics associated with the biological categories of male and female. Subtly or overtly, we are pressured to conform to social norms, encouraged to learn accepted interaction scripts, and usually develop preferences for using different communication styles. Though attitudes have evolved, in U.S. society, many still expect women to be more nurturing, sensitive to others’ needs, and more emotional than men. Similarly, they expect men to be more independent, assertive, and emotionally restrained than women. Some families even persist in dividing responsibilities along gendered lines, assigning more physically demanding outdoor chores to males, while expecting females to clean the home’s interior, cook, and care for other family members, including younger siblings and aging parents. Some hospitals still wrap baby girls in pink blankets and baby boys in blue blankets. Girls and boys similarly are provided with different kinds of toys—perhaps dolls for girls and action figures for boys. Schools have been criticized for encouraging students to pursue different curricula depending on their gender. So, from the delivery room to the home, to the school, and on to romantic relationships and career paths, we see gender shaping lifestyle. However, as we become more conscious of arbitrarily created gendered meanings, we are able to broaden our understanding of what is appropriate behavior and what we accept as “normal.”

While we all express gender through behavior that we believe is normal, what we define as normal changes with time. By identifying how arbitrarily created gendered constructions, or conventions, affect interpersonal communication and our relationships, we take a step toward understanding what we hope for when it comes to our interpersonal lives. Do you see your options as unlimited? What tasks do you feel free to perform? What limits, if any, do you believe should be placed on the role gender plays in our social, professional, and family relationships? While all societies promote gender ideologies that specify appropriate behaviors for males and females, what should you do if you believe a gendered construction is privileging, disadvantaging, empowering, or paralyzing you or a partner?