Читать книгу The Road to Resilience - Adam Przytula - Страница 18

In Star Wars (I love Star Wars), Master Yoda explains, ‘Fear leads to anger; anger leads to hate; and hate leads to suffering’. This was me. From Year 4 until Year 7 I became more and more afraid of losing my sporting ability because it was the only thing that made me feel good about myself. In Year 4, I started getting bullied. By the time I reached Year 7, the kids who were supposed to be my friends beat me up instead, leaving my confidence in tatters. (I'll share this story with you later in the book.)

I went into Year 8 (the first year of high school in Western Australia at the time) with my self‐esteem having spiralled to an all‐time low. I had completely stopped trying at school. I hated myself, and it was really painful.

No‐one ever told me that it was okay to feel things. I didn't know that our emotions are a really important part of who we are. I don't blame my parents because they didn't know any differently and they acted in ways that tended to be ‘normal’ for their generation: ignoring negative feelings or reacting with anger. I grew up thinking this was normal. I thought I had to push down my anger and push away my negative feelings and pretend they weren't there. This had a huge impact on my self‐esteem.