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It’s time to get serious about reclaiming your self-esteem. Whatever your personal zenith was, whatever the time in your life where you were totally ruling, winning and firing on all cylinders—that’s where the answers are to reclaiming your self-worth. That’s where your self-esteem was the highest, when you were projecting that into the universe and having the most personal success. You have to go back to the point in your life where you felt the very best about yourself and figure out how you got there, what was going on for you then that isn’t now and how to get yourself back into that space. To find a great relationship it’s imperative that you of all people believe all the best things about yourself again and figure out why those beliefs went away in the first place. Seriously, if you don’t feel them then why would anyone else be able to feel that about you?

Bust out your laptop, a notebook and cocktail napkin or whatever you can find. It’s personal inventory time. Fill in the blanks in the most specific terms you can. Let’s see if we can’t go and find the super you!

1 When was the best period in your life?

2 What was going on that made it great?

3 What was different about you then?

4 How did you feel about yourself then?

5 When did things change and what changed?

6 How do you feel about yourself now?

7 What can you actively do to get back into that space?

Let’s build on the good stuff you already have going for you

1 Why are you special?

2 What makes you different from everybody else?

3 Why are you a person of value that others should get involved with?

4 What are your best qualities?

5 What are your lovable flaws?

6 What are the tiny victories you’re going to line up for yourself?