Читать книгу The Fussy Baby Book: Parenting your high-need child from birth to five - Martha Sears - Страница 38

Channelling behaviour starts with knowing and accepting the child that you have been given. You use your knowledge of your child’s behaviour to structure your home environment and shape your interactions with your child in such a way that the child’s behavioural traits blossom to his advantage, as well as to his family’s and society’s. This is much healthier and more successful than trying to change your child’s basic nature, trying to reshape him into a behavioural clone of everyone else. High-need children whose behaviour is channelled appropriately may be the leaders of the future. In fact, many people who have contributed positively to society were once high-need children whose behaviour was gently shaped by wise and sensitive parents. Many people who have grown up to harm society have been high-need children who were not recognized or nurtured. A high need that is unmet may reappear later as a less healthy need, one that is difficult to meet in a socially acceptable fashion. A high need that is met early is more likely to reappear later as a positive quality for the child, one that works to his advantage. A mother who recognized early that she had a high-need infant and worked hard to channel that child’s behaviour confided to me, “Early on, I knew this child had the potential to be either a criminal or President.”