Читать книгу The Fussy Baby Book: Parenting your high-need child from birth to five - Martha Sears - Страница 43

Many new mothers and fathers start parenting believing they must be in control of their child. Or, they may be the product of controlling parents themselves and have vowed not to do anything to squelch their child’s personality. Both extremes cripple a child. Putting the lid on a child’s personality stunts the child’s emotional growth. Letting a child’s emotions and character traits go unguided risks having the child turn out wild and lacking in self-control. Aim for a balance. Children need to be comfortable expressing their needs, yet high-need children need a high level of guidance to express themselves appropriately.

For the sake of your child, and yourself, in the early weeks of parenting, unload the baggage of your “control mind-set” and learn to give freely. When you have opened yourself up to be flexible enough to keep working at a style of parenting that helps all family members thrive, control will no longer be an issue. Without the stifling baggage of control hindering your intuitive parenting, you will be free to guide your child, channelling his personality traits to work to his advantage and to the advantage of the family.

Supersensitive babies react in a big way to physical and emotional discomforts. They let you know, in no uncertain terms, they hurt and they need help – now!

He cries in protest when the littlest thing is not right with him. He is so sensitive. Whenever he has a cold, he cries and whines, and needs to be held constantly. He wails when he has an ear infection. At his nine-month check-up, I recall our paediatrician saying, “Wow! So much anger for such a little baby.” I think he was just angry that his teeth hurt.

Though upsetting to your ears and frustrating to your sensitive heart, supersensitive babies are at least easier to read. They let you know when they need help or when something should be changed in their care-giving environment. Their signals cannot go unnoticed.