Читать книгу The Good Behaviour Book: How to have a better-behaved child from birth to age ten - Martha Sears - Страница 51

“I don’t care what the book says, Bobby and Jimmy, fighting is not going to be normal in our home”, said a mother who knew her tolerance. Part of discipline is learning how to live with a child through different developmental stages, and the child’s learning how to live with you. A child’s early family experience is like boot camp in preparing for life. A child must learn how to get along with family members in preparation for future social relationships. He needs to be adaptable, to learn to adjust his behaviours to a particular family need. Billy is boisterous by temperament. Yet Billy is expected to play quietly for a few days because mummy is recovering from an illness and has a headache. It is healthy for the child to learn that the sun rises and sets on other people beside himself. Children must learn to adapt to house rules to prepare them to adjust to society’s rules.

Disciplining in a developmentally correct way does not mean becoming lax. While it is necessary to tailor your discipline to the temperament and stage of your child, widen your acceptance when the going gets tough, there is no excuse for not expecting and helping your child to obey. It is easy to pass off behaviour by saying “He’s just going through a stage” or “That’s just part of his temperament”, yet it’s important to keep a balance between the child’s need to develop and the family’s need for well-being.