Читать книгу Tantric Secrets: 7 Steps to the best sex of your life - Cassandra Lorius - Страница 15

Take the first step to Tantric bliss by learning to love yourself. Before you can love your partner unstintingly, you must love yourself. Self-love is the key to self-development. Tantra deepens intimacy with your partner, but this means first taking responsibility for the quality of love that you can give. Look inside yourself to discover the depths of love. In Tantric sex, love is seen as a universal energy that is also inside you both individually. Through intimate lovemaking, you can explore and exchange this vital source of love.

If you lack confidence or are frequently emotionally demanding in a relationship, you risk becoming overly dependent on your partner; if you feel distant, you are likely to push your lover away. In order to be truly happy in a relationship, it is necessary to be joyful when you are alone.

You may, however, find it difficult at first to take the time you need to look after yourself. You may need to reframe your thinking, affirming that you are a worth-while human being and that finding the path to love and bliss is a basic human right. Tantra says that love and self-love is your birthright. It is not selfish to nourish yourself, pursuing activities that feed you. If you are used to pleasing others at your own expense, take the space to do what you enjoy. First of all you may require time alone, getting to know yourself and what motivates you; you can do this by recognizing the positive activities that nourish you – gardening, walking, dance, music or other creative hobbies. Explore your particular passions in life and live them. Someone else cannot be made responsible for fulfilling your needs. Let go of the negative aspects in your lifestyle and relationship that hold you back, such as any compulsive or self-destructive elements.

Although it may be tempting to skip this section and get right down to the sexual techniques explained later in this book, make a vow to start at the beginning – by looking after yourself. All the time you spend nurturing yourself will ultimately enrich your relationship as well. You will have so much more to bring to your lover. The fuller you are, the more fulfilment you will find together. To bring bliss into your relationship, you can learn here how to experience this heightened state independently. Then both of you can prioritize those aspects of your relationship that bring you nearer to joy and bliss, and enjoy it in abundance.

This Step shows you four Tantric principles with exercises that you can use now to release tension, and teaches you the Tantric secret of how to still the mind and awaken the sexual energy that fires your passion.