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Once you have determined what EQ skills you want to focus on, you must then identify what specific actions you will take. If you are going to work on being a better listener, you might decide that whenever you are talking with someone that you will take the time to pause, listen thoroughly to what they have to say without interrupting, and check with them that you understand what they are saying before you craft a reply.

Hopefully your answers to the above questions placed you more than half‐way toward the side of possessing EQ, which means that you know you have an opportunity for improvement. “Opportunity for improvement” is a positive frame for the concept of deficiency and your first lesson in the use of framing.

People are sometimes tempted to use personality tests to determine their EQ, but many of these tests, such as the Myers‐Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), do not have much value in predicting success, uncovering motivation, and understanding yourself and others. Instead, they attempt to pigeonhole people into types such as “feeling” or “thinking” or expressive.” Most psychological tests are not designed to assess emotional intelligence, so if you are interested in improving your EQ, use tests specifically designed for that, such as the Emotional Intelligence Appraisal – Me Edition, available for purchase at https://www.talentsmart.com/products/emotional‐intelligence‐appraisal.php.