Читать книгу What Women Want Men To Know - Barbara Angelis De - Страница 14

It was a challenge to write this book so that both women and men could feel I was talking directly to them. There are sections in which I am explaining certain things to women about themselves, and hoping that you’re reading this information as well. Then you will notice specific places where I make a point just for men. The best way to read the book is from start to finish, knowing that everything I’ve included in What Women Want Men to Know is designed to make you a lot smarter about women, love, and sex.

If you haven’t done so already, please go back and read the “Message to Women” at the beginning of the book. It’s just as much a message to you as it is to women, and you will find it helps to set up the rest of the chapters.

As I remind women in their Message, every female is unique and different, and so at best, all of what you read will be generalizations. This is where you come in: If you’re in a relationship, I strongly suggest that you discuss the material in this book with your partner:

Ask her if a particular point accurately describes her feelings.

Invite her to comment on what I say or what other women expressed.

Let her know what specific suggestions you’d be willing to try, and ask if these would make a difference to her.

Having these kinds of discussions will give you much valuable information about your wife or girlfriend. You’ll also find these conversations effortless and stress-free, compared with ones you’ve had in the past, because you will both be able to start your dialogue from the common ground of this book, rather than just your own opinions, and thus it will feel less adversarial and more like you’re both on the same side. Best of all, your partner will LOVE it that you are showing interest in her feelings, wanting her input, and that you care enough to ask.

I need to take a moment and say what this book is not about. It’s not about deeply wounded women with severe emotional problems who have shut down their feelings, suppressed their needs, and cut themselves off from their hearts. If you are presently or have been with a woman like this, you may find that nothing I say about how women behave applies to her. That’s because in order to defend herself from further pain, she’s built walls of protection around herself, and detached from her ability to feel. Men who make a habit of choosing emotionally unavailable women will be unable to relate to much of this book, and if you suspect you might be in that category, consider reading Are You the One for Me?, which will help you understand more about the patterns that prompt you to end up in unhealthy relationships.

I have a confession to make: I wrote this book secretly hoping my own partner would memorize every page, drink in each word, and digest every bit of information about me as a woman. I hoped he would enthusiastically try out every suggestion and explore each technique, intent on doing all he could to become the man of my dreams. If your wife or girlfriend gave you What Women Want Men to Know, guess what – she’s secretly hoping the same thing that I am!

Of course, what I am describing is how a woman would read a similar book, how a woman would approach pleasing a man, how a woman views improving herself, how a woman views love. Did you know that we are that way – focused on loving you twenty-four hours a day? Well, you’ll learn about it in the chapters that follow.

So how will you read this book as a man? What will you do with what you discover in these pages? Only you have the answers to these questions.

But I’ll confess another secret: If my sweetheart only takes a few important things from this book, it will be enough. I will be grateful that he was interested enough to spend the time to read about me, that he was committed enough to try to understand the tenderness of my heart, that he cared enough to consider ways in which he could make me feel more safe, more valued, more loved.

Your woman feels the same way. If, by reading what I offer here, you learn to appreciate her a little more fully, listen a little more closely, and love her a little more sweetly, she will be happy – and it will be enough.

Thanks for trusting me to take you on this journey into the heart and soul of a woman. I promise you it will be worth it.…