Читать книгу Raising Cooperative Kids - Marion S. Forgatch - Страница 25

This is a common mistake we make as parents when giving directions. Naturally, we resort to this approach when we are in a hurry. Rather than taking a few moments to follow the strategies for giving clear directions, we forget several elements.

Dad rushes through the room, calls over his shoulder on his way to the car: “Alison! Hurry up! We have to go!”

What is missing here? Look at the strategies for clear directions and revise this statement to make it more likely to succeed. How long do you think Dad will race his engine before Alison joins him? Will he have to go back inside and try again? Given that he has to start over, how likely is he to be pleasant (or at least neutral)? Let's rewind and try it again with another approach.

Dad rushes through the room on his way out the door. He stops, comes back, and stands by Alison. He gently touches her shoulder, makes eye contact, and smiles.

“Alison, grab your backpack and let's go now, please.”

Then he stands and waits for her to get started.

In the long run, which approach takes more time? And which one will elicit that spirit of cooperation you're working to develop?