Читать книгу Raising Cooperative Kids - Marion S. Forgatch - Страница 30

Phrasing directions as questions weakens their power and suggests children can choose whether or not to comply. Directions given as statements do not imply choice; they make it clear that you expect your child to do something very specific, and to do it now. Some parents explain that they are trying to soften the effect of a firm, clear directive. But you can be pleasant and respectful without framing your direction as a question. Furthermore, questions sometimes invite irritating responses. Notice how ineffective it is when Dad asks Ali questions rather than making clear statements in these exchanges.

Dad: “How'd you like to pick up your shoes?”

Ali: “Not especially.”

Or

Dad: “Where do your shoes belong?”

Ali: “In the closet.”

Dad: “Well . . .”

Or

Dad: “How many times do I have to tell you to pick up your shoes?”

Ali: “Oh, maybe five or six.”

Or

Dad: “Can you pick up your shoes?”

Ali: “No, I can't. I'm busy right now.”

Directions are clear and simple statements, not questions.