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It's hard not to get caught up in the emotional strain of being in the middle. But remember that you're part of a pattern. It's not personal, it's a reflection of the position itself.

Here are reframes that speak to the nastiest of the emotional toll—the sense of isolation and being undervalued.

1. It might feel like you're on an island at times, but that can be a good thing. You're actually a safe haven for workers to express frustrations, voice concerns, share ideas, and take risks without fear of undue punishment. I once took my team to an art studio where each member painted a picture of an island, as a symbolic gesture that this team would be an oasis, unlike any other team in the company, a safe‐haven and enjoyable place to be, free from typical company nonsense.

At the same time, of course, you also connect to the rest of the organization, and connect disparate parts of the organization to each other, by building bridges.

2. You're not alone, you're on loan, a ninja in the middle, there to make the engine hum. You're there until your talents elevate you upward in the company or across to something you're more interested in.

3. Senior managers might not always acknowledge your value, but everyone else does. Recall the earlier Boston Consulting Group research—you're more appreciated than you realize.

4. While at times it might feel like you're not in control of much of anything, you're always in control of your attitude. Just as important, you may have become numb to the amount of daily influence you have in the countless tradeoffs and decisions you make every day. No one in an organization makes more decisions that matter each day than those who lead up, down, and across.