Читать книгу The Truth about Relationships - Stefan Blom - Страница 6

introduction

The experience of your relationships determines the experience of your life. This is a simple truth. If you feel close and connected to the people around you, life feels good.

Connection is the highway to happiness.

A life without real relationships is not a good life. The truth is that real relationships are honest and connected relationships – there is no other way to be in relationships. A life with close and connected relationships is always a more meaningful and significant life.

In our core, we are made for real connections. Our basic human nature is designed for togetherness, closeness and connection.

Animals and humans crave feeling connected to one another, because we feel incomplete without closeness and connection. When you don’t feel close to your daughter or son, or when you feel distant from your partner, it makes you unhappy. If you connect only with things and places, you don’t feel complete. To be truly happy, we need real, connected relationships.

To connect and stay connected is to love.

Because we are designed for real connection, there is no other way but to live an honest and connected life. A real relationship is an honest relationship. The closer you are to the people and animals around you, the happier you will feel. Being connected is happiness in action.

The only life worth living is a life of honest, close connections.

We remember and cherish our moments of true connection. When we speak about the times when we were truly happy, we speak about the moments when we felt more connected to ourselves and the people around us. These are the best times of our lives, for the simple reason that the more connected we feel to ourselves and the people closest to us, the happier our lives feel. When you look at an artwork, your pet, your partner, your garden, or your parents, and you truly connect with them, you love them. In these moments of true love, you will move and be moved, and life will bring you real joy.

Real, connected relationships hold the power of happiness. Maybe relationships are all that matter. Maybe relationships are all we really have to give us joy.

How often you are honest and connected to yourself and the people around you will determine the experience of your life. Think about it.

Our connections to places, things, people and animals need to be honest and real. We all know that connections to things and places are not as powerful as connections to humans and animals. The ironic truth is that the more things you have, and the more beautiful the place you are in, the more your need for real connections will surface. When we are in beautiful places, we miss our real connections. Therefore, we find true happiness in our relationships with the people and animals we connect with and love.

In the next nine chapters, you will find ways to move from disconnection to connection in any of your relationships. These include:

•Steps you can take to prepare yourself and create a context for having honest conversations;

•A selection of basic relationship skills that you can use for speaking honestly and openly;

•A selection of advanced relationships skills that you can use during your most difficult conversations, especially when you disagree;

•Practical steps to restore a sense of trust in any of your relationships, if trust has been broken;

•Exercises and topics for discussion that could assist you to reconnect sexually and intimately;

•A collection of questions in preparation for dating, and lessons for dating and meeting new people;

•An understanding of what you can do, practically, if your relationship feels like it is ending or when your heart is broken because your relationship has reached its end; and …

•An honest and practical guide to how to love yourself;

•Some frequently asked questions, with answers.

This book is written in such a way that you can read any topic of interest to you. At the same time, you may learn something about yourself even when you read a chapter that does not seem to apply to you.