Читать книгу Zita West’s Guide to Getting Pregnant - Zita WEST, Zita West - Страница 15

So many couples just don’t have sex often enough to get pregnant! However, I don’t advocate sex just for the sake of getting pregnant; it should be part of every couple’s normal, loving relationship, a way of sharing intimacy and having fun together. That way, sex doesn’t become an issue or a chore – where the man thinks the woman is only interested in sex as a means to an end, and not as an expression of her feelings for him. Women, in turn, can become fixated on their fertile time, and only want sex at this time. Prior to this, a couple’s rate of sex may have dropped to once week, or a couple of times a month, which may suit them fine – but it’s probably not happening enough for a pregnancy to result!

Sex can steadily become mechanical for so many couples; it is so hard for it not to. Many men suffer from ‘performance anxiety’ around sex if it seems that their partners are only interested in having sex around the time of ovulation. This puts a huge pressure on them. I have heard stories of women emailing their husbands at work, driving to their offices and demanding sex, which inevitably ends in a row and no sex.

If you have been trying for a while, a few basic questions:

• Are you sure you have been having sex at the right time and often enough?

• Are you only interested in sex at the right time of the month and not at any other time?

• Are you still making an effort with your relationship?

Plan ahead; make some of the changes specified in this book before moving on.

If a couple can keep their lines of sexual communication open, and enjoy this aspect of their relationship for its own sake, and not just as a means to pregnancy, then the process will be less stressful all round.

Contrary to popular belief, having sex often does NOT weaken sperm. Research has shown that the more a couple have sex, the more fertility is improved. Here are the figures for women aged 20–30: