Читать книгу Zita West’s Guide to Getting Pregnant - Zita WEST, Zita West - Страница 20

Linda was 38 and had been trying to get pregnant for two years. She was tearful, angry and upset about her situation. She was on the Internet for up to four hours a day, plus all day at weekends. In the consultation with me, when I asked how it was affecting their relationship, her husband Paul said he had started to dread coming home – Linda would have inevitably found another treatment to pursue, another pill he was going to have to take. He felt completely unable to get through to her; any suggestion he made would get shot down. He felt that Linda was in a total spin; he felt depressed, isolated and fed up of constantly trying to please her. He felt inadequate, and that Linda resented this. His deep, deep concern, which he only felt able to voice in consultation, was that as much as he loved her, he felt that the drive to achieve a pregnancy was becoming destructive for the relationship. Paul had tried to understand Linda’s burning desire to have a baby, but he wanted their old life back together where when he came home they had a drink, a chat, a laugh, not him spending time on his own while she was on the Internet.

Linda was able to express that, on her part, she felt panicky that she was running out of time. She felt very stressed and was waking at 4 in the morning and grieving about the child she might never have.

The plan we came up with was to set an absolute limit on Linda’s Internet searches and work on getting her internal environment back into balance by doing some yoga and meditation. We did a detox with her to help her lose some weight and we changed the IVF clinic that she was currently attending. Linda got back in contact with me later, to say that our consultation had really been a turning-point. She had not really been aware of the impact her pursuit to have a baby was having on her relationship. Her interpretation of Paul’s behaviour was that he wasn’t interest ed in any suggestion she made about treatments, and she felt that he was blocking her at every point. After our consultation she felt she really understood where he was coming from and felt much calmer as a result.