Читать книгу Zita West’s Guide to Getting Pregnant - Zita WEST, Zita West - Страница 19

It is essential to keep talking. Often things come up in the safety of the consulting room that have been bothering one or other partner. As I’ve said earlier, trying to get pregnant – especially if it’s not happening as expected – is inevitably emotional, and ignoring this can create problems. So I look for opportunities to encourage couples to share their feelings, ideas, and even their resentments! It’s much better that these are aired, addressed and resolved than left to fester. I can provide the space for this.

I often recommend couples-counselling for those for whom the situation has become too difficult to deal with. It is far too easy to become estranged through the process of trying to get pregnant. In some cases, I have found that men seem to accept the situation more readily than women. The man may be more relaxed about getting on with life, while his partner may interpret this as a lack of commitment, especially if she is researching on the Internet, seeking out opinions and information, and wanting to focus on getting pregnant almost to the exclusion of everything else. Understandably, many men get fed up, and this can exacerbate the situation still further.

Very often, a few sessions of skilled couples-counselling is all that is needed to bridge the gap, allowing partners to express their feelings and their views, relieve tensions, reduce blame and establish a united platform from which to proceed.

Men need to express how they are feeling, and in the right setting it is amazing what comes out between a couple, especially when a man feels safe about being able to express what he is truly feeling about the situation.