Читать книгу Designer of life: 70 golden rules of deep transformathion. A practical guide to mindfulness. Will replace years of spiritual seeking - - Страница 15

“Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” – George Bernard Shaw

This rule states that your Life does not exist without you, just as you do not exist without it; you are a single organism. It appears in this world with you and disappears with you. Your connection is unbreakable: it came to experience itself through your body. And for you to resonate in unison, you must know the rules of this game. But humans are designed in such a way that they often fail to notice It – their Life – until the very end.

Everything you fill yourself with as you grow – your thoughts, feelings, beliefs, values – shapes your reality and fills your Life. If you are full of negativity, your Life will likely be filled with difficulties and problems. If you radiate positivity, love, and gratitude, your Life will be happier and more harmonious.

From the perspective of positive psychology, this principle is close to what Martin Seligman wrote about. He emphasized that a person’s subjective self-perception has a profound impact on all areas of life. The scientist cited experiments where participants with a more positive self-image showed more persistence, coped with difficulties more easily, and ultimately demonstrated a higher level of life satisfaction.10 His work in the field of “learned optimism” shows that our habitual ways of interpreting events and perceiving ourselves are not unchangeable but can be consciously adjusted. This confirms the idea that we are capable of “creating ourselves” and influencing the quality of our lives through internal changes.

Your inner state is the foundation of your life. It determines how you perceive the world, how you react to events, and, ultimately, how happy you are. Restructuring your habitual way of perception is not an easy task, but it is achievable. Since childhood, most of us – myself included – have been accustomed to focusing on what is “wrong.” It’s a kind of inheritance passed down from generation to generation. But this vicious circle can and must be broken.

I started simply – by learning to see what “was right” in every event. Gradually, I began to notice the pleasant little things that accompany each day: my morning coffee, a ray of sunshine, a passerby’s smile, a delicious dinner. At first, it required conscious effort, but over time, this attentiveness became a natural part of my life. Then, I began to consciously fill my day with things that I liked and that brought me pleasure. To do this, I had to study myself well – my interests and values. I made a list of what I love: foods and drinks; scents I love to inhale; fabrics I like to wear and touch; music that soothes my soul. All these actions changed my inner state, filling it with joy, and, as a consequence, transformed my reality.

To start changing your inner state, try making a list of everything that brings you joy and pleasure, using your “five senses”:

• Sight: Write down a list of things that are pleasant for you to look at. This could be natural phenomena, works of art, favorite colors, fire, a cozy interior, beautiful objects, photos of loved ones. Hang a print of your favorite painting on the wall, buy a bouquet of your favorite flowers, take a walk in a beautiful park.

• Hearing: Compile a list of pleasant sounds. This might be music, birdsong, the sound of rain, a cat’s purr. Listen to music by your favorite composers and the sounds of nature, even for just a few minutes a day.

• Smell: Make a list of your favorite scents. This could be the aroma of freshly brewed coffee, freshly baked bread, flowers, the sea air, your favorite perfume. Use essential oils and candles with your favorite fragrances.

• Taste: Create a list of foods that bring you pleasure. These could be your favorite dishes, fruits, sweets, or drinks. Prepare delicious food for yourself, savoring every bite. Linger on this pleasure a little longer than usual, filling yourself with this feeling of enjoyment.

• Touch: Make a list of pleasant sensations. This could be the softness of a blanket, the warmth of the sun on your skin, a massage, or swimming. Try to experience these pleasant sensations every day.

Consciously shaping your inner state is an active process that requires time and effort. But it is the key to a happy and fulfilling life. When your inner state is harmonious, you become more resilient to stress and more open to new opportunities. You start attracting pleasant events and kind people into your Life. Therefore, investing in your inner state is the best investment you can make right now.