Читать книгу Are You the One for Me? - Barbara Angelis De - Страница 25

Mitchell is a thirty-six-year-old attorney who wanted to figure out why he couldn’t find the right woman to marry. ‘I’m looking for a powerful, independent woman who won’t smother me in a relationship,’ he explained, ‘but somehow I end up with the opposite.’

STEP 4: MITCHELL’S SUMMARY LIST OF SIMILAR OR COMMON QUALITIES

Drama queen

Controlling

Obsessive

Victim

Emotionally unstable

Immature

Sexually damaged

When Mitchell looked at his summary list, he was amazed. ‘I found these women so compelling,’ he admitted, ‘but for all the wrong reasons. I’m obviously attracting weak, little-girl types with a victim mentality and a real addiction to drama. You can imagine how turbulent these relationships are. The women fall apart and go from one crisis to the next, and I try to rescue them and fix everything.’

Mitchell learned several things from his Love Choices Chart:

He not only attracts women who are addicted to drama, but he himself is obviously addicted to drama, since he puts up with this kind of behavior.

He gets to feel superior to his partners by choosing women who are a mess, and helping them get their lives together.

Even though he says he wants a strong, independent woman, he finds women who are dependent and not self-sufficient, and once again he gets to feel needed and important.