Читать книгу Sex For Dummies - Pierre Lehu A., Dr. Ruth K. Westheimer - Страница 126

Back in the day, the standard procedure was that the male would keep trying to push the boundaries — touching his date’s breasts through her clothing, putting his hand under her clothing, and so on — and the female would either allow her date’s hand to explore or push it away.

Today, there are new standards being implemented, but not everyone is on board, and that goes for both sexes. The key is to keep that word consent front and center. We humans communicate in so many ways, not just with words. In fact, even words can have more than one meaning. A woman might say no in such a way that she really means yes but wants to be asked again, or say yes but is obviously giving in to pressure and not pleasure. So it’s better that a “No” be given as clearly as possible. (But if she wants the relationship to continue forward, that “No” shouldn’t be given in a mean way either.)

So both sexes have to make some changes as to how they communicate with the opposite sex. Men have to learn how to ask without pressuring, be that physically or with words. Women who may have been taught they should play hard to get, believing that saying yes too quickly will make the man respect her less, have to modify their technique or else the men they’re with are going to go looking elsewhere.